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22 hours ago @ Crasstalk - Big Start Open Thread · 0 replies · +7 points

There was a shooting at the Boise mall, I was just letting you all know I wasn't involved.

1 day ago @ Crasstalk - Big Start Open Thread · 4 replies · +6 points

It wasn't me.

2 days ago @ Crasstalk - Weekend Open Thread · 1 reply · +2 points

Still waiting on my squirrel food, which needs to be kept frozen. Probably going to get it on tuesday (5 days after I ordered it and I was forced to pay extra for shipping) and no I can't find it local. It will probably be spoiled when it gets here. Squirrel dad is getting angry.

2 days ago @ Crasstalk - Weekend Open Thread · 0 replies · +2 points

Welcome to Plathville makes me want to barf when I am listening to it in the background while my wife watches it. People who are that emotionally stunted and fucked up should not be allowed to have their lives exploited for ratings.

Almost every show about couples does not end well for the couples, who says "Yeah, nobody else survived this, but we can!" I realize it's all about the sweet sweet cash they get paid (I also assume they are members of SAG-AFTRA) so it's annoying to hear them complain about money. Don't pretend you don't have cash sweetie, we all know the producers are going to fork over the pocket change for your boob job.

Now we get Tampa Baes, noted Space Dick enthuisast and Lex Luthor cosplayer Jeff Bezos is really going to put a "reality" show out about lesbians in the Tampa area. Just get it over with and have real people hate fuck each other on TV, because that is where this is heading. Vin Diesel and The Rock. Jen Psaki and anyone from Fox News. Anyone with an IQ about 110 and Tomi Lahren. Ted Cruz and his hand. Gold Jerry! It's going to be gold!

3 days ago @ Crasstalk - Weekend Open Thread · 1 reply · +5 points

About as sure as I can be, I have caught myself leaving the room a couple times to grab something from the fridge and come back to find I left the cage open by mistake. These last couple of weeks I have been low in energy and having trouble focusing on tasks. I have been stressed by all the moving/construction, my legs look like I got into a cage match with a bunch of really short black belts and I lost like 10lbs. I see a doctor on monday though.

3 days ago @ Crasstalk - Weekend Open Thread · 5 replies · +10 points

I went into the Squids room and discovered I had left the cage door open. There are easily a couple hundred spots in that room they could hide and it would take me forever to find them. Fortunately, when Squirrel Dad opened the door they were both easily visible. After a brief "We are busted" pause, both ran back into the cage.

I want to weigh them, but I also like my blood flowing through my veins and not out of it. They are getting wild ya'll. I figure I got another week, 2 at most where they respect me and then it's full on Squiddageddon.

3 days ago @ Crasstalk - Weekend Open Thread · 0 replies · +4 points

You should have seen him on Seth Meyers before and after rehab. He was clearly out of his mind doing those segments before, then he came back after and talked about how out of his mind he was.

4 days ago @ Crasstalk - Weekend Open Thread · 5 replies · +7 points

A sweaty man on TikTok said he has info that Olivia Munn and John Mulaney broke up. Twitter is in a titter. This was a predictable outcome.

5 days ago @ Crasstalk - Midweeker · 0 replies · +4 points

The parents need to be hit with Obstruction charges in the least, accessory after the fact would be more appropriate.

He took the cowards way out, I knew he wasn't coming out of that swamp alive. I have zero sympathy for the parents in this case.
His parents finding him right away is sus, they knew all this time and weren't talking.

5 days ago @ Crasstalk - Midweeker · 1 reply · +7 points

I am trying to get an art comission done for my D&D wizard. I want her attractive but menancing and mentioned she dresses conservatively.

So far the styles from the artists who have applied are
Soft and Cute
Big Boobed Bimbo

I just want a half-elf female wizard who doesn't look like some Sailor Moon wet dream or one of the girls from that volleyball game that was basically porn.

Edit - Also, I am at my limit of looking through portfolios and seeing furry porn. There are some weird people out there.