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Even if it weren't implied, it doesn't matter. What Wes did was still a disgusting violation of Hope's agency, and the question of whether or not it included sexual rape in addition to the mindrape aspects of his actions does absolutely nothing to diminish the crime he committed against her.
4) Season four spoilers: yvggyr qbrf Fnz xabj, gung gvgyr vf nyernql gnxra.
I think the fact that what the Winchesters chastised him for was "you don't always get what you want" and NOT the fact that he completely removed another person's agency is part of the problem. Glossing over the implications of mind control - like the fact that what he did to her WAS rape because she couldn't and didn't consent - IS the problem, not just an unfortunate oversight.