236 comments posted · 10 followers · following 0

10 years ago @ Wonkette - GOP: Downward Facing D... · 1 reply · +33 points

Who needs a vaccuum? [spit!] I clean the trailer by wiping everything down with duct tape. Satan won't be sodomizing me, now will he?

10 years ago @ Wonkette - Happy Birthday, Dr. Ji... · 2 replies · +18 points

Which Amtrak? [spit] The slow one that barely gets started and breaks down before it gets anywhere, or the high-speed one that's done before you even noticed until you suddenly find yourself in New York?

10 years ago @ Wonkette - Happy Birthday, Dr. Ji... · 1 reply · +10 points

When your penis is a joke, it's time to move on. [spit!]

10 years ago @ Wonkette - Brazilian Preacher Arr... · 0 replies · +5 points

It's written in the Book Of Peen

Suck the throbbing cock,
Pastor Picanto will come,
To make your life full.

10 years ago @ Wonkette - Nice Time! High School... · 6 replies · +55 points

We already have gays in the military, now this. [spit!] What's next, gay actors in the theater?

10 years ago @ Wonkette - Nation Remembers N.J. ... · 1 reply · +11 points

C'mon! Real Americans live in Alaska and Wyoming. [spit!] They obviously need representation, seeing as how they are "We the People" and all.

10 years ago @ Wonkette - Nation Remembers N.J. ... · 14 replies · +11 points

Does New Jersey even really need two senators? [spit] The place is just a suburb of New York and Philadelphia, with a nasty turnpike running up the middle. [spit] So, everyone there already has representation from the other states. This is how we cut government waste, people! [spit!] Free the people from the burden of excessive government by downsizing the senate.

10 years ago @ Wonkette - Steven Seagal Is Your ... · 3 replies · +13 points

One man's shitty movie is another's epic allegory of the struggle to find meaning in a world driven mad by the alienating omnipresence of consumerism. [spit] I think of Steven Segal's acting choices as constituting a model of authenticity. Fuck yeah! [spit!]

10 years ago @ Wonkette - Steven Seagal Is Your ... · 2 replies · +20 points

I've been working on integrating, leveraging, and optimizing return on the meth market.[spit!] I wonder if there are Russian producers who would profit from my extensive knowledge of the trade. Does Russia have trailer parks?

10 years ago @ Wonkette - Thank God This Arizona... · 2 replies · +22 points

Good to see a lawmaker show some spine. [spit!] And "spine" is an anagram for "penis," so it's all good.