This getting life, to me, is one of the saddest that I've read thus far. Most in the past have had some form of hope or findings of something else besides the nothing that this man can't get passed. However, I guess M speaks more of the reality of prison and what most people would think of it if they were asked about it. There is so much nothing and I couldn't imagine it. Hearing something like this from a "lifer" should give hope and strength to everyone that can find love. It should be something cherished and not taken advantage of in the slightest bit. By thinking of the people such as M who cannot be given that opportunity it should make others want to find love and treat it with the up most respect that it deserves. For the pure fact that out of everything that this man has lost, love is the strongest thing for him, it should have an effect on many people. More than the freedom of doing what you want, feeling loved is one of the greatest things a person can have. All i can do from my perspective as a student reading this is say there needs to be some sense of something you can find love in. Whether it's a certain group of people in the prison you can share anything with, religion, or anything that you can obtain or think about in prison. Feeling alone will just lead to deeper and deeper depression, and I can only imagine what that depression would add to a person who is in prison. For M, I am not very sure that his feelings will change because sitting in a cage thinking of thoughts such as these it might act as a cement forming thought that he will never find love anymore. I hope he can find something to put his focus on to take it off all the bads and lean closer to the goods. As hard as that may be, it might be the only way to live healthy in a place such as prison.

I feel that what J.V.G. writes about in this later mainly focuses on the point of generalizations. Generalizations are something that keep people close-minded. Generalizations are what keep people from seeing people for who they are rather what group they might seem to be a part of. They've created problems as deep as racism and unfortunately are still here today. The fact is, most of society today is a follower of this generalization theory, and it is a difficult concept to talk about when as a question such as; do you generalize certain people? Although many might be quick to say that they are only influenced, or they only judge how or who the person actually is, the majority generalizes in one way or another. Although this was a letter based on being a considered a "lifer" I feel that the idea that J.V.G. writes about focuses on a much broader topic. These "labels" that are given to groups destroy what certain individuals might have to offer to the world. It is combining traits and aspects of everyone and not including the individuality of every person. Furthermore, although this may never change it will always be known as wrong. I've learned through reading a lot of Getting Life's that there are plenty of individuals in there who are what people make them out to be. However, to say that every one of them are alike is just wrong. It all comes back to the old saying, "don't judge a book by its cover." I'm not to sure if people will ever learn the lesson behind a saying like that to the fullest extent, but it should definitely be acknowledged.
I hope that everyone who reads what this man had to say open there eyes a little bit more and allow themselves to meet those people they might never wanted to be a part of. Although there may be certain attributes that certain groups of individuals all have, there are also certain attributes that will never be seen if we don't open our eyes. Everyone needs to help push these generalizations behind them, and maybe this world will become a better place.

Having a girlfriend for almost two years now this message sent by C seems like a very warming subject to me because as hard as it can be to be that very good guy that he discusses, it is how you build and keep a healthy relationship. The media and overall view of woman is not this way, at least not anymore. Everyone feels the need to be "cool" and it has become accepted through most men today. The word "chivalry" just isn't as significant as it was in the past. However, as people grow older it seems to come more into play. Me as a 19 year old, I feel as if I'm going against the crowd but for some reason I just want to do everything to keep what I have. Just because I'm in college doesn't mean I should follow the crowd because that's not what I'm personally about. I believe that all the things that C listed are necessary to give to a woman because although these are just the things a man should get the things that woman give in return is very worth it.
C must have had some problems in the past and his message makes me curious to what exactly got him where he is today. However, it is very respectable to hear what this man had to say, and what his views were because to me everything he said is true and the way it should be. There are plenty of things that aren't necessarily socially accepted or at least used to their full capabilities. One of these things would definitely be the acceptance of treating people of the opposite sex right. For some reason it's just the way it is today. Everything that C said is the right way, but I don't think in any case or any topic in this crazy world that everything will be the right way unfortunately. All we can do is watch the way sociology takes its form and has an impact on society. Maybe if more people like C were to speak up, the world could change for the better.

Without hearing much of this man's background I believe that no matter what he did to get him where he is today he is definitely taking productive steps in helping his and others lives. He has clearly accepted what he is and refuses to let himself be known as someone who has failed now. C seems to realize that although it is very hard dealing with not being able to "be in the loop", he accepts what he has and makes the best of it. You really never get the idea of what his background is all about and what this man could have possibly done to get him in prison. All he claims is that he was a good guy and he definitely has supporting evidence of that by saying his teachers from high school still write him years later. Although it is apparent that he does have some struggle not being able to be as close as he once was, C seems to find help to this by allowing himself to be an older brother figure for those that have recently been put in prison for life.
Just like many other of the getting life's that i have done in the past this man does seem like he's going down the right path for a healthy future; or at least a future that gives this man the strength to feel good about himself. I couldn't imagine being in prison and not having the slightest bit of support system. Or more than just a support system but a family that you want nothing to do with. Your family should always be your closest people through thick and thin and when that's gone I don't know who else there is to look too. It's always good to know that someone like C is out there to at least attempt to be that support system for these young men that might have less of a support than he does.
Life and furthermore life in prison, must be one of the hardest things to go through without any sort of support. No one to talk to, no one to love, no one that when you’re sitting alone you can say that someone is thinking of me. I hope C can help as many people as possible and stay on his path of aid for the rest of his years.

Although it seems as the average person who has never experienced something that any of these other men have, just as an observation and reader of Getting Life, it seems that B unlike many other lifers is living by what he lost rather than what he can possible do with his life in the near future. Obviously for a very understandable reason, it was just an observation I made after reading all these others. To focus more on this man's situation, I feel although he is there for a reason that this man should be looking for something better only because what else is there. He seems in a very depressed state of mind and doesn't know what to put his focus on to allow for a better life. It is very sad to hear a poem such as this one because as the reader knows, this man may never find that warmth that he is so desperate to find ever again. I hope that one way or another this man can find some sort of objective in his life to focus on to bring him some sort of meaning.
The unfortunate fact is that when someone commits such a crime to put themselves in a situation just like this man they have to pay forever. And that fact alone could most definitely drive someone crazy. the idea of not having anyone who cares around you. Like B states, there is no love or warmth; it is a cold-hearted place with people all in the worst situation in the world. The one mistake they made that cost them everything. And all they can do is sit in a cell and look around and see everyone with the same dull idea of nothing.
Not knowing much of this mans background but rather only judging on his present feelings can only leave me to say that I hope he can find something that shows him a new way of life. I hope he can see the good and not the bad. Put his eyes past reality and into something much deeper that brings him satisfaction. b needs to find his own sense of warmth with something that gives him meaning.

The fact that this man is able to tell everyone to not have pity for him is a very wise statement for a man in his situation. At the age of 14, your friends are pretty much your everything. Yeah you have your family but around this age is when you realize how lenient you can become on your friends. It seems that he was in a very troubled state at this age but of course as he restated many times, there is no way to feel bad for this man. He understands what he has done was wrong and knows what he wants but now has to take what he's given and do what he can with it. I will listen to him when he says not to feel bad or anything it's just a very hard thing to live with something you did at such a young almost meaningless age. I could never imagine being in the same position but I can understand that there are so many kids that I'm sure have very hard youths and do things that they feel they need to be free at the young over protected age they are at.
However, to say that this man is a bad person I don't think can be true. Yes plenty of people out there have there own stereotypes about everything but that's just not right. Because noone knows everyones situations out there. You can't place your finger on the word murder or lifer and just claim something without hearing there story. M. was totally right on his approach for why he wanted to write such a letter which was to answer the question why. It not only just answered why but it answered so many questions that the average person would wonder about a person in prison for life. Sometimes just like he stated, no matter how much you want to be free when you feel that you realized what you've done and gotten past it all some things you do can't be taken back. What he did was absolutely wrong but I am proud to know that a person who had a troubled youth although now is in prison has been able to change his life for the better.

Although as stated in this man's letter that fear is something that everyone deals with in their everyday lives, the fear of being in prison for life is quite apparent that it has the most impact on someone. So many unfinished thoughts have to be going through a person's head in and out of everyday. And for the fact that these thoughts are unfinished there must be so many fears running through a person's mind. From his actual life, to the life that he once had and now seems to be lost; he lists his fears of both and states how he has to deal with these in his sub-conscious all the time.
I personally feel the hardest for one to cope with would have to be what his loved ones portray him as today. They don't know who he is in and out of everyday anymore and simply have a very bad memory of what got him where he is today. It must be a truly grueling experience to have to come to the acceptance that the ones that were your closest will no longer know everything about you. However, this man just like many others in jail for life I would assume do come to realize what they must do to move on. What they have to do to put these fears past them and take advantage of being able to wake up every day. His personal troubles are more of a public issue in that i feel like although he must feel being in that cell is the only thing for him, and his thoughts are only his; the majority of the people in his situation will have many of the same feelings.
It is so difficult to understand the exact mental flow of these citizens in jail for life. Sometimes I feel no matter how many of these I read I will never truly understand how these men get through what they do. I just know that they do because there are so many that are forced to and survive through it. Although I can never put my finger on what exactly goes through the heads of these people in their daily lives I cannot stop reading because I'm so intrigued that I can have the opportunity to read what these people have to say.

This man apparently felt the need to tell the world about every part of his life that could have brought him to where he is today. And although he tells us about this one time only, I'm sure this train of thought never fully leaves his mind and it will stay with him forever.These readings always make me feel lucky for who I am and always make me want to keep a head on my shoulders at all times. Yes I'm a college student and yes I see dumb things happen to people all the time but I want to do whatever I can to make sure people such as this man are not me. I refuse to think of my life as something of the past and I would never want to be paralyzed in a cage for my whole life. Unfortunately although I would never think of doing something to put me in jail for life at the age of 15, some people are put in places that can alter everything. Turn a good child into a bad one all based on their environment. A public issue took over this man's life and he could not beat it. He thought being in the "hood" and having sex with random girls was his own choice but it wasn't. He was just another statistic just like I would assume many of the people in prison for life are.

I have once again chosen to write in the Getting Life subtopic for this blog. The idea of learning more and more as you get older is one thing but the idea of learning more and more while in prison is very different and interesting. The understanding that one man who is in one plain, dull, non-eventful place for his whole life can sit and evaluate his whole life so often is very cool to look into. Although it is a very sad topic, it also allows for people to change for the better. And not only change but take a larger more broad perspective of their life.

Everyone has dreams that they hope to achieve and I'm sure even this man has dreams today that he has to realize can never become reality. He will never have the chance to strive for something. Work for somethign and get the satisfaction of achieving it. This is truly a scary idea to grasp and I could not even imagine as a 19 year old person that I am today, having all my hopes and dreams stripped from me because of a mistake I made. Furthermore, that mistake being so significant that i will never be given the chance to learn from it. Just like all of these blogs this man gave me an experience that I am glad to open my eyes too.