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12 years ago @ Wonkette - Glenn Beck Figures Out... · 0 replies · +9 points

Sorry, I just got back from committing terrorist acts like I always do...so what's going on now?

12 years ago @ Wonkette - Liveblogging The New H... · 0 replies · +20 points

Impossible to answer that question in only 30 sec.

12 years ago @ Wonkette - Liveblogging The New H... · 0 replies · +15 points

I agree, His nose is crooked like someone broke it which would not be surprising considering what a massive, massive douchebag he is.

12 years ago @ Wonkette - Liveblogging The New H... · 0 replies · +13 points

His mic cut out. He was trying to say that's he's taken the bullets...loaded, and fired them.

12 years ago @ Wonkette - Liveblogging The New H... · 0 replies · +1 points

By the time this post hit, she pretty much retracted that. We all knew the logically consistency couldn't last.

12 years ago @ Wonkette - Liveblogging The New H... · 0 replies · +20 points

Newt forgot to mention that we also questioned the loyalty of all our Japanese Americans during WWII and.....oh, wait that's right, it was a total human rights disaster and a national embarrassment. Nevermind, keep fucking that chicken.

13 years ago @ Wonkette - Boycott These Koch Ind... · 0 replies · +8 points

Shit, so long Dixie cups. Though I suppose glassware would add a sexy/dangerous element to beer pong.

13 years ago @ Wonkette - Brokenhearted Rep. Lou... · 1 reply · +15 points

For me it depends on what precisely you mean by "hitting that":

with a blunt object? yes
with my vagina? nooooooooooooooo

13 years ago @ Wonkette - Weeping-Eagle Erotica:... · 0 replies · +4 points

Zombie Reid, perhaps? It works with the "rising from the dead" theme John Kerry has going for him.

13 years ago @ Wonkette - Weeping-Eagle Erotica:... · 1 reply · +5 points

I think it's less of a question in this case and more of a destiny.

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