IntenseDebate - cynicaloptmst81

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - Pharrell's G I R L Alb... · 1 reply · +10 points

Thanks Streetz....my beef with the beef exactly.

Now, I actually thought the lady in the back looked black from the jump. Either way, I felt like the first thing to do would have been to ASK if there were any black women on the cover. Why no one bothered to do that before spazzing out, I don't know.

I feel bad about how the black woman on the cover must be feeling...and the fact that no one seems to care about her feelings in this beef.

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - Five Pieces of Advice ... · 0 replies · +1 points

It sure is! My fav reminder from the list...

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - What's Up With Guys Wo... · 0 replies · +1 points

That MSU jab hurt, yo, lolol...

But, I never stayed on campus so I can neither confirm or deny, lol...

Def a solid break down though...

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - Why Are We All Looking... · 2 replies · +3 points

I think being honest with yourself about who you are and are not is step one. It's the first thing you need to do in order to get a strong stance about your position/choices in life. Do that correctly, and what society says won't matter...and not in a "what society says doesn't affect me" kind of way, but in a "what society says won't dictate what I do or don't do" kind of way".

If you really know and accept who you are...and you're good with who you are, then you won't be comfortable conforming. I don't think what I'm saying conflicts with the post at all. *shrugs*

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - Why Are We All Looking... · 4 replies · +8 points

I think you hit the nail on the head.

People aren't honest with themselves about who they are, what they want, and what will or won't work for them. There's a conflict between what it is and what they feel things should be...and the conflict should be resolved before they make any permanent moves.

This is why we need to take time getting to know people and have a clear perspective of what we want...so we can see this type of conflict when it exists in the person we are dating and walk away.

Know thyself and to thine own self, be true. Set goals you can achieve. Have people around you that are aligned with you (values, vision, etc.). Makes like peaceful and helps it to go a lot smoother...

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - When It Comes To Relat... · 0 replies · +2 points

Personal experiences and personalities def skew what people take away from blog entries/comments. So, yeah, arguing can be pointless b/c we don't fully see why people view things the way they do. And the "why" (or details) matters when it comes to actually winning an argument. W/o seeing the full picture to refute or affirm the root of certain perceptions, most arguments just drag on. That's why I fall back on "we can agree to disagree" fairly quickly. But opinion pieces are just that. You don't need to be an expert to have or give an opinion.

"At a certain age, it’s your fault that you screwed up your relationship."

So true!!! And some folks argue simply to try to play this truth down. And the word "relationship" can be replaced with "dating life".

Comparing this quote with #3, if you own your faults, it makes sense to want to address them (change) and increase your odds of relationship/dating success in the future. Not a massive overhaul of yourself per se...but def tweaking the areas that need improvements.

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - When It Comes To Relat... · 0 replies · +2 points

"The best advice is use your own judgment and be realistic, but its hard to sell books with 7 words in it."

LOL

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - Date That Man: 6 Reaso... · 0 replies · +7 points

Maybe I read the post wrong, but I thought she differentiated between real friends (#1) and real relationships (#2-4). I didn't get the sense that she was suggesting women trample over women's true feelings for a man she was really close with/in a relationship with. I agree with the premise of the post...that women need to emotionally release men that you only had a shallow dealing with (what you built up in your mind doesn't count) back into the dating pool completely. Emotionally holding on to a situation that barely got off the ground serves us how? In my opinion, if you're really over it and you and that girl aren't even friends friends like that, it won't and shouldn't matter to you. And, if you aren't over it, that's your problem to deal with. You can't make other folks responsible for your issues. Again, not speaking about your real friends or real past relationships...

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - Why Men Hate Dates: Th... · 0 replies · +1 points

Wow. LMBO!!!!!!!!!!

10 years ago @ Single Black Male - You Pray That Doors Op... · 0 replies · +4 points

"I think the (dis) carries a negative connotation. There’s nothing wrong with discontent. It is the driver of progression and goals."

I 1000% agree with that statement. All while still standing by my comment, lol. When I used the term content, I was referring to the "pleased and satisfied" part of the definition. I am pleased and satisfied when I am working toward/reaching goals that I set for myself (or my relationship). This is possible. We can agree to disagree on that, lol.

Discontentment can be bad if it doesn't have any boundaries or limitations ever though. For instance, no woman ever pleases/satisfies you, you can't stay at a job more than 9 mos., you move every 12 mos., etc.. There can be a harmful extreme (constantly needing more) to being discontent...as is the case with contentment (never wanting more) as well. As with most things in life, balance is key. How that balance plays out in our lives def varies though.

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