Talitha

Talitha

34p

42 comments posted · 1 followers · following 0

517 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - Genesis gets the Crumb... · 2 replies · +1 points

Pure Sin!!
We have regular Book Burnings and we now have a new one to add to the list.

If you want some real reading, try one of Pastor Deacon Fred's many books based on real True Christian™ philosophy.

My own favorites are:

"Daddy, Why Did Jesus Kill Grandma?"
God's violent anger is directed toward those who dare to question His perfect love for them. Grandma Jenkins is no exception. One little slip of the tongue on her deathbed secured an eternity of separation from God. Marooned alone in the lake of fire, her only company is a visiting red-finned water demon who sodomizes her from the deep as fire waves crash into her screaming head and burst her wrinkled body into flames.

or

"Donkeys Can Talk, People Can Fly, And a Man Named Jesus Lives Up in the Sky!"
Creation Science for Teens is a Bible based textbook designed to reclaim America's children from the corrupting influence of today's culture. Religious leaders around the country believe it will replace most high school science textbooks in the next four years.

and that old favorite: "

"The Talking Snake Theory: Creation Science & History for Christian Children".
For True Christians®, Jews, and Muslims, our entire belief systems hinge on a few words from a talking snake who appeared around this same time. By using fun characters and cartoons based on factual accounts from the Holy Bible book of Genesis (one of the few history books that all three major religions in the world agree on), youngsters are taken on an educational journey they will remember for the rest of their lives.

You can get them Online at the Landover Baptizon Store: http://www.landoverbaptist.org/talkingsnake.html

518 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - Writers of the Bible g... · 1 reply · +1 points

Finger pressed firmly in each ear, blindfold over eyes............. "Lalalalalalalala.......... I can't hear you"
I always deal with this kind of thing like that. It's the Christian thing to do.

What nonsense once again spouted by these God hating ScIeN tists.

If it says it in my Bible, it's true.
God wrote the Bible and God and the Bible is always right. It says so in my Bible.

My Pastor says these Scientifical types are all going to Hell.
It says that in the Bible too.

1 Timothy 6:20-21 O Timothy, keep that which is committed to thy trust, avoiding profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called: Which some professing have erred concerning the faith. Grace be with thee. Amen.

518 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - Charlatan Benny 'The H... · 0 replies · 0 points

Isn't it obvious dear?
Anyone not shown as being True Christian™ is Unsaved Trash.
We True Christians™ at Landover have all kneeled down before Jesus and gladly been filled with his Love.

Now, which of you Sinners gave me a thumbs-down for my last post?

518 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - Charlatan Benny 'The H... · 8 replies · 0 points

Oh, just so typical of the Godless British.
Persecuting a poor defenseless Christian just because he has great teeth and hair, and earns an honest living healing poor folk who can't afford medical insurance.
You know, we recently had one of our Christian Scientists do a study to find out what Jesus will look like when he returns, and guess what?
It turns out he'll be the spittin' image of Benny Hinn.
This handsome man with his naturally tanned skin, his near perfect hair curves, and neatly trimmed nostril hairs is the closest representation of what Jesus Christ would physically look like if he were to appear to us today.

519 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - Vatican priest nabbed ... · 2 replies · +1 points

It's a good job that Catholics aren't real Christians.
Stuff like this would want to make me give up my belief in Jesus. (Peace on HIM).
Now we know where all the money is going.
The catholic cult has a history of taking the money of poor widows in order to say masses for the dead (which do no good) and collecting the material possessions of nuns.
In Italy, the heart of papism, there is an often used saying that goes, "Without money, they don't sing the mass."
That is really pitiful on several fronts--1) mass is blasphemous and people who trust in it are hell-bound
2) there's no such thing as purgatory and ..
3) the gift of God is without price.

521 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - Religious discriminati... · 3 replies · +2 points

This religious intolerance has gone too far!
Why, only yesterday I was innocently walking around my local Supermarket when my Stoning Bucket was confiscated.
How on earth can I express my faith as the Lord intended?

The Jews killed Jesus and now they are trying to kill Obi-Wan Kenobi .

521 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - Don’t mention the wo... · 1 reply · +1 points

Brother Barriejohn, Rap is the work of the Devil.
Do you think we want the youth of our peaceful Church taking on the Negro lifestyle?
Of course not! You may as well ask if the Pope is a Catholic.
We all know that Jesus is as white as the driven snow and would find Rap music as Unchristian as Veganism.
In fact, our own Pastor Deacon Fred wrote a Sermon on this matter as far back as 2000:
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news1200/rap.html

522 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - Deranged Baptist preac... · 2 replies · +1 points

The Christian world should be proud of a man such as Pastor Steven Anderson who tells the Truth as written in The King James Bible.
The stories we could tell about his life before he got $aved.
Praise Jesus, all his Sins are now washed clean.

522 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - Good news and bad news... · 3 replies · +1 points

You are quite barriejohn.
1st Corinthians 3-10 sums up a womans place within Christianity:
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoureth his head.
But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven.
For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.
For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.
For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man.
Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.
For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels.

526 weeks ago @ The Freethinker - ‘Crazy atheists’ f... · 2 replies · +2 points

That's just typical of UnGodly Atheists trying to spoil everything for Bible believing Christians.

Now, Tom, if you are reading this, you are always most welcome to come over and join God's favorite Forums at Landoverbaptist.net. (Where the worthwhile Worship, Unsaved Unwelcome).
Our little Community of True Christian™ folk will, I'm sure, give you a warm welcome.
We don't teach fluffy-bunny Christianity. We teach Hard-Core King James Old Testament Bible just the way God intended it to be.
We get our fair share of Demon infested Atheists and even softy Liberal New Testament false Christians trying to disrupt our Boards.
It doesn't stop us trying to teach them the Truth about God's word.