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3 days ago @ Clever Manka - Friday Open Thread · 3 replies · +5 points

We had massive storms last night and the power was out. Well, out, then back on, then out....all evening.
My patio is total destruction, but at least none of our trees caught fire from lightning. I no longer have any working patio umbrellas but they seem to be the worst casualty. Until you see my garden, where the saddest sunflowers ever are just drooped all over the place!

Teengirl needs mojo to go back to band class--is her own worst critic and needs motivation of the "get back on the horse" variety. Otherwise is doing ok considering.

Teenboy has been given stronger anti-anxiety meds which seem to help but this is definitely a marathon and not a sprint.

Did I mention how this drama is forcing me into frequent, intense interaction with my abusive ex? I am going to my counselor more frequently to keep from gaslighting myself with his lizard speak. He is still treating Teengirl like a possession and not a person. It has been a challenge navigating the crisis of Teenboy without allowing ex to walk all over Teengirl, and I have to be VERY picky about the battles I choose.

5 days ago @ Clever Manka - Mid-week check-in · 5 replies · +9 points

I have an adunct offer for next semester, so at least I will have bare minimum money happening.

Tomorrow morning is going to be a really stressful day for Teenboy. And the rest of us. I wish I could talk about it more but can't--and this is probably the first thing I've ever felt like I couldn't share here. I feel bad for always asking for support and not elucidating. That said, can you keep us in your thoughts tomorrow? With maybe some extra brave thoughts for Teengirl thrown in there?

On the plus side, now I only have one offspring in a lockdown psych unit on suicide watch, instead of two.
Yeah, ugh, I'm upright and breathing. And haven't blown up at my ex. And I made it through my lecture today. Gah, undergrads are soooooooooo trying when they stare blankly at you.That's got to count as my good things for right now.

also, bought a new mattress. Want to burn scraps of the old one as it reminds me of the ex, etc. Anyone have a ritual to recommend or a website to point me to?

2 weeks ago @ Clever Manka - Friday Open Thread · 5 replies · +5 points

Mostly bad news here, so I was very hesitant about posting--

but putting a positive spin on things:
The other shoe has dropped on the Teenboy issue and, while horrible and miserable and about the worst, it isn't *quite* as bad as it could be, and at least now that first step of waiting is over.

HS band director has been very protective in protecting Teenboy's GF(Teengirl's BFF) and Teengirl from harrassment/bullying/fallout. They are both incredibly brave young women.

Things are legal now and won't be resolved for ---maybe up to a year? Teenboy is still in a safe place and cared for 24/7.

I am managing to get to my class to teach, and it is good to have the distraction. The dissertation is about the furthest thing from my mind. Not great, but something's gotta give.

5 weeks ago @ Clever Manka - Clothes maketh...well,... · 2 replies · +5 points

I have a pair of thigh-high striped black and white tights (with a graduated width stripe pattern) that I wore to my first NYU audition. They would probably disintegrate if anybody tried to wear them, but they will always have a place of honor in my drawer.

My mom had a mustard yellow suede a-line mini in the 60's, and it's gone through her, me, my sister, and now hangs in Teengirl's closet.

5 weeks ago @ Clever Manka - Clothes maketh...well,... · 0 replies · +4 points

The only shoes I can buy out of the box and not have blisters from are Chucks. Same with my kids. At one point we had a huge pile of black chucks-hi-top, low-top, leather, super knee-high, falling apart ones, and "nice" ones, at the front door, at least 3 pairs each of us. Luckily the boys could share sizes, but there were still treasure hunts every morning between the 4 of us.
Our front door always has a pile of chucks.

5 weeks ago @ Clever Manka - Thursday Link Dump · 0 replies · +5 points

example: the Tesla symbol. Did NOBODY tell the man that it looked like an IUD? Nobody????

5 weeks ago @ Clever Manka - Mid-week check-in · 4 replies · +5 points

oh dear lord that was a close one.
Nearly lost--no, DID lose my shit yesterday when I found out that I'd been de-funded last March--but nobody bothered to tell me. It would have been nice to know BEFORE the summer!!

Today a new PhD student pulled out and I get my 8th semester of funding.
I was looking at no job. So whatever you ladies are doing, it worked, at least I have 3 months more income. Won't get to do my drone class but at least will be a productive member of the university while applying for jobs, instead of having to explain why I'm not funded.

May be months before we even have a beginning of knowing what's happening with Teenboy. Until then he is safe.

Teengirl passed her driving test!!

6 weeks ago @ Clever Manka - Mid-week check-in · 5 replies · +9 points

Dear lord I finally got the password/id right to log in again!

The wonderfulness of *THIS* week is that my funding got "forgotten" and not budgeted. So we can cobble me together one last part-time semester but I shouldn't have had to, and that means I can't pay the fee for my open-access journal and I can't do the week in Cambodia field-work follow up. So if anybody has any witchy skill at finding the missing paperwork I need to get my funding back, send it towards Ohio, please!!!! If I can prove that the dept. said they would fund me I will be in much better shape. Have been tearing home and office desks apart for the last 2 days.

Told advisor what is going on with Teenboy. Nothing will be better for months and could get quite a bit worse. I have her support and at this point can just be grateful that I still have him on this mortal plane. I haven't stress vomited or randomly ugly-cried this week yet? what with the PhD news on top of this, I'm pretty numb.

13 weeks ago @ Clever Manka - Friday Open Thread · 3 replies · +6 points

I love looking at stuff other people have embroidered. I can't even do cross stitch in a straight line without bleeding fingers.

I have taken RoseCamelia's suggestion and my instagram name is MovingViolets. There's not much yet because thunderstorms are drowning things as fast as I plant them (there was a tornado in my county last night). But my snakey buddy was in my yew bush this morning.

I'm just dragging. self-motivation to finish my research is hard, and I am so sick of coding/learning matrix algebra.

13 weeks ago @ Clever Manka - Mid-week check-in · 0 replies · +2 points

Our first bunny was given to us by a neighbor. He knew how to unlatch his cage --he managed to get out of his cage, which was inside the chicken coop, which was inside the big goat barn, all the way out, and I had to lay on my stomach to crawl under the grain barn in the snow to catch a white rabbit it 12F weather. We named him Houdini. You'd think I'd've learned!