en-us https://www.intensedebate.com/users/11877159 Comments by LaxMom http://clevermanka.net/2021/05/26/mid-week-check-in-249/#IDComment1100339317 Checking in: trying to allow myself to take this week off from PhD and job hunting anxiety. (end of semester). Teengirl's last day of high school is tomorrow. Ask me if she's got her term paper written or her final project done. (used to be) Teenboy took a plea deal. Just typing that out makes me want to cry. Sentencing is in 2 weeks and I really, really don't want my kid in prison because he tried to kill himself. Not to mention that that will probably accomplish the former if he ends up there. June 8th please send all the everything you've got that my kid gets probation and can continue in treatment. After that Teengirl turns 18 and the child support is over. Good, because I'm done with ex. Bad, because I have yet to earn a living wage or finish my PhD. Not like I"ve been distracted or anything. Eldest got a new job driving a forklift and is satisfied for the time being. I'm going to go buy plants and sit in the mud, weeding. Wed, 26 May 2021 19:30:26 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/05/26/mid-week-check-in-249/#IDComment1100339317 http://clevermanka.net/2021/05/26/mid-week-check-in-249/#IDComment1100339172 I am right there with you, on both counts. I wish I had something more encouraging to say! You can always come take a break in Ohio for a few days if you need to switch things up and commiserate with someone new. For self care, I'm going with "plant the damn flowers already" and "You KNOW this is a bad week for you, just acknowledge it so you don't get caught by surprise'. Wed, 26 May 2021 19:22:35 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/05/26/mid-week-check-in-249/#IDComment1100339172 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/26/friday-open-thread-245/#IDComment1098554224 The kids I babysat had care bears but the closest i got was traded puffy stickers in my sticker collection book. 4th grade memories! Just wanted to update to say that Teengirl is home, physically ok, and the new meds are really making a difference. How she will ever get anything made up in time to graduate is the next big challenge. And I'm off crutches next week! Sat, 27 Mar 2021 14:25:16 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/26/friday-open-thread-245/#IDComment1098554224 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/26/friday-open-thread-245/#IDComment1098554134 agreed! Nice, simple, sandbox-level problems! Sat, 27 Mar 2021 14:21:04 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/26/friday-open-thread-245/#IDComment1098554134 https://clevermanka.net/2021/03/15/monday-open-thread-13/#IDComment1098255185 T is off the breathing tube and awake sometimes. Pretty much beat up all the nurses when the hallucinations got bad (she'100lbs but it took 8 people to hold her down). eeg looks good, liver and kidneys are ok. Hopefully she will transfer out of the PICU today or tomorrow. Mon, 15 Mar 2021 20:54:11 +0000 https://clevermanka.net/2021/03/15/monday-open-thread-13/#IDComment1098255185 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/12/friday-open-thread-243/#IDComment1098215842 i really needed to hear that. Thank you. Sun, 14 Mar 2021 04:15:51 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/12/friday-open-thread-243/#IDComment1098215842 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/12/friday-open-thread-243/#IDComment1098179144 Teengirl took a huge overdose. Is currently in PICU heavily sedated and medicated for seizures. They expect her to stay on the ventilator for several days. Send me strength. And the ability to go without sleep and not fuck up my hip surgery, please? Fri, 12 Mar 2021 18:24:51 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/12/friday-open-thread-243/#IDComment1098179144 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/12/friday-open-thread-243/#IDComment1098179089 was a scout through high school. Even got a job offer to be a guide at one of the (then) big 4 boy scout camps, tinnerman up on the french river. Really embarrassed my little brothers by setting a cliff jump (into a river) record that they had to live down. my favorites are samoas and tagalongs. TW suicide info in comments Fri, 12 Mar 2021 18:22:33 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/12/friday-open-thread-243/#IDComment1098179089 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/10/mid-week-check-in-236/#IDComment1098173228 can't log in again on a a nrw thread. Teengirl attempted OD again last night. Is in ICU having seizures. Fri, 12 Mar 2021 12:38:38 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/10/mid-week-check-in-236/#IDComment1098173228 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/10/mid-week-check-in-236/#IDComment1098129565 Does fixing broken body parts count as self improvement? Because I'm on surgery #2 in 6 weeks and this one is tough. Like can't get myself dressed on my own for weeks tough. Still plugging along trying to keep Teengirl afloat. Still waiting and fighting on two fronts the former-Teenboy court cases. Distracting him by talking about gardens again. Haven't been able to log in for a while and I'm on my phone so I will keep it short. Getting some back PUA $ so I can open medical bills without a heart attack for the present, at least. Wed, 10 Mar 2021 20:25:40 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/03/10/mid-week-check-in-236/#IDComment1098129565 https://clevermanka.net/2021/01/22/friday-open-thread-236/#IDComment1096905890 Still here. Career stuff looking good, but in the nature of academia, unreliable. Didn't end up teaching this semester. TW: surgery went in for an ovarian cyst removal wednesday and (not a surprise to me) they found a bunch. of endo and removed it. Teengirl is being incredibly doting and I may attempt a shower. Brain is finally in work gear again and body isn't cooperating! Fri, 22 Jan 2021 18:55:46 +0000 https://clevermanka.net/2021/01/22/friday-open-thread-236/#IDComment1096905890 http://clevermanka.net/2021/01/08/friday-open-thread-234/#IDComment1096548658 still here. A fresh legal hell has been added to the former-Teenboy saga. Still waiting to find out if and what I will teach this semester, at a new college, will have only days to prepare. But, hey, at my pre-op appointment I got told that I have "a simply beautiful ekg"! And then I got flirted with by a cute guy at the Lebanese bakery/deli. I'll take it. Fri, 8 Jan 2021 22:35:53 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2021/01/08/friday-open-thread-234/#IDComment1096548658 http://clevermanka.net/2020/12/18/friday-open-thread-231/#IDComment1096003900 TW: whiny rant ahead SO. Instead of having surgery next week, I'm having ovarian surgery at the end of Jan and then recovering and having hip surgery in March. Guess when Teenboy's trial will probably be? So I'm turning 50 next week. Got divorce right at 40. Had no job, no money, couldn't work because I was dealing with hip and pelvis injuries. I worked my ass off raising my kids and getting 1 1/2 degrees in the past 10 years, only to have my archaeology prof fired for sexual harassment. Have a part time teaching job, maybe, if there are enough students at the community college to teach. But instead of having surgery before the semester, I'm now gonna have to figure it out during the semester at a new college. Oh, and Teengirl still self-harms when we talk about college apps, and Eldest's job is being shitty so he's stressed about money. She turns 18 in June and child support runs out. My mom can pay my mortgage for about 6 months...until June-ish, when the double whammy hits. Whatever, I've given up on the money angle and chalked it up to 2020 again. BUT I fell apart and dumped on teengirl. "I've worked for 10 years and done all the things right and made all the plans and every last one has gone spectacularly wrong and here it is TEN YEARS LATER and I still have no money, no job that I can live on, and am facing a year of surgical recovery and crutches. Which also means that I can't do any fieldwork either. DUUUUUUUUUUUUDE the winter bleak has gotten me good. Plus my mom's way of grieving has been to make sure that I got a will made and life insurance bought, which isn't helping the whole "turning 50 and haven't been kissed in over a decade" thing. PLUS my little cousin (47) has stage 4 colon cancer. Sorry, that pity party just had to happen. I hate my birthday. Fri, 18 Dec 2020 20:11:53 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2020/12/18/friday-open-thread-231/#IDComment1096003900 http://clevermanka.net/2020/12/18/friday-open-thread-231/#IDComment1096003606 I cannot even tell you how much this (unfortunately) resonates with me. Sympathy and commiseration. Fri, 18 Dec 2020 19:54:22 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2020/12/18/friday-open-thread-231/#IDComment1096003606 http://clevermanka.net/2020/12/09/mid-week-check-in-226/#IDComment1095793468 Ok, trying this again! We were incredibly lucky that the tree our electric line runs through didn't come down. It sagged but held. My mom and others down the street didn't have power all week. 20 inches is typical lake effect snow. 3 times in the past 24 years we've had 5 feet in 24 hours. Once was on Earth Day. Wed, 9 Dec 2020 18:31:37 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2020/12/09/mid-week-check-in-226/#IDComment1095793468 http://clevermanka.net/2020/12/09/mid-week-check-in-226/#IDComment1095792868 Still waiting for last week's 20 inches of snow to melt enough to use the front and back doors. Currently we're just using the garage door, because it nearly killed Teengirl and I to get that much shoveled clear, even with the plow coming 3x. It was just that fast. Eldest is a bit down because he can't start his new job until the background check clears. Teengirl is dealing with midterms. How about we burn Teenboy's legal mess, my bad ovary and hip, and Teengirl's college app anxiety? And my ptsd. Too much? Wed, 9 Dec 2020 17:47:42 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2020/12/09/mid-week-check-in-226/#IDComment1095792868 http://clevermanka.net/2020/11/25/mid-week-check-in-223/#IDComment1095490462 very big hugs. I'm in those trenches with you, if you need to vent Thu, 26 Nov 2020 04:11:12 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2020/11/25/mid-week-check-in-223/#IDComment1095490462 https://clevermanka.net/2020/11/23/social-isolation-open-thread-32/#IDComment1095479677 The prosecutor refuses to deal, and the trial was literally supposed to be a year ago. So nothing really changes, except that the slight chance that I might have my kid home for the end of the year is gone. And if this is like in March, the courts won't be back up until February. I want to hug my kid and it's gonna be a lot longer before I can. Wed, 25 Nov 2020 15:51:12 +0000 https://clevermanka.net/2020/11/23/social-isolation-open-thread-32/#IDComment1095479677 https://clevermanka.net/2020/11/23/social-isolation-open-thread-32/#IDComment1095477422 2 weeks. We were 2 weeks away from trial and the courts are shut down again due to covid. Wed, 25 Nov 2020 13:47:10 +0000 https://clevermanka.net/2020/11/23/social-isolation-open-thread-32/#IDComment1095477422 http://clevermanka.net/2020/11/20/friday-open-thread-227/#IDComment1095419199 Hi right back! I'm trying to be around more! Sat, 21 Nov 2020 16:04:53 +0000 http://clevermanka.net/2020/11/20/friday-open-thread-227/#IDComment1095419199