gdp's Comments

The Toast : A note on The Toast

Fri, 1 Jul 2016 16:14:15 +0000

Oh my god. And *your* hair looks great, too, Madam soon-to-be-President.

The Toast : The Final Link Roundup!

Fri, 1 Jul 2016 13:27:50 +0000

I have spent the last week being mostly sad and furious about Brexit and my stupid, stupid country, but today I am even sadder about the end of The Toast. I should have known that something that burned so bright could not last, but we will always have the memories (and the archived site). I raise a glass to The Toast and all my fellow Toasties, and for a final time, I take to the sea.

The Toast : Hey Ladies: Take it to Slack

Thu, 30 Jun 2016 20:56:42 +0000

Hey Ladies! So I accidentally took a Brexit last week, and I'm still feeling the effects. Can anyone tell me when it wears off? Seems like everything is on fire and nothing makes sense any more lol. "Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." - UK Prime Minister Winston Churchill "The haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate" - TayTay (Oh Ladies, you terrible people, how I will miss you. Thank you, Caroline and Michelle. *pours one out for Gracie*)

The Toast : Annotating Dean Martin's "Gentle On My Mind," The Greatest Work Of Art Produced By The 1960s

Wed, 29 Jun 2016 21:49:17 +0000

I didn't even know I needed an annotation of Dean Martin's performance of Gentle On My Mind, but now the world would be incomplete without it. O Toast, where will I find such things when you are gone?

The Toast : "I saw writing from people like me": Readers Toast The Toast

Tue, 28 Jun 2016 16:34:44 +0000

Finding The Toast was like discovering someone had crafted the most perfect present just for me. It felt like Christmas morning. It was sharp, fiercely intelligent, high-brow and low-brow at the same time, loved myth and art and stories - and it was so, so funny. And then I discovered it was Christmas morning for a lot more people than just me, and the comments were even better. I haven't felt so much loss since Shapely Prose closed. I mean, NBD that it's closing. I'm sure there are lots of other misandrist, women-in-Western-art-history-captioning, two-monks-inventing-art, making-children's-stories-horrible websites with an archive of texts from great figures of literature and a complicated love/hate relationship with Ayn Rand out there. *sobs forever*

The Toast : Don't Let Anyone Tell You That You Can Read Chaucer's Untranslated Prologue

Tue, 7 Jun 2016 19:42:18 +0000

I work for a famous university press that last year made an emoji (😂) our Word of the Year, to much wailing and gnashing of teeth (including mine at the time), but I think it's legitimately fascinating how all this stuff* is changing language and written communication (hashtags, emojis, lolcats, memes, gifs and so on). *Stuff is a technical linguistic term, of course.

The Toast : An Update To Wikipedia's "List of people who disappeared mysteriously"

Tue, 7 Jun 2016 18:39:10 +0000

I'm Spartacus, and so's my wife!

The Toast : Women Who Have Gone Back in Time: An Annotated Ranking

Mon, 6 Jun 2016 21:03:53 +0000

And there are Muggle-born witches and wizards! Do none of them ever want to do anything non-wizarding as a career? Do none of the kids want to be doctors or lawyers or football players or hairdressers or publishers or journalists (there's only one wizard paper, after all)? Apparently joining the wizarding world is a one-way ticket - no one ever seems to go back, and they wouldn't have the skills if they wanted to.

The Toast : Women Who Have Gone Back in Time: An Annotated Ranking

Mon, 6 Jun 2016 18:33:40 +0000

I just watched the last episode of Outlander S1 last night, and I am SO DONE with all the rape. The final episode is basically one long gratuitous torture-porn rape scene. I don't think I'll be watching S2. And Claire is an idiot. Yes, why go back home to the 20th century where you have the vote and antibiotics and dentistry, when you can stay in the 18th century and probably die of a treatable illness or in childbirth. Despite her idiocy, Claire has somehow memorised everything about the Highland Uprisings and 18th century Scottish customs, which is pretty handy for her. The only thing I like about her is that she's drunk most of the time, which is pretty much how I'd handle accidentally travelling back in time. Love Sex Kilt, though. It was almost worth watching 15 hours of rape attempts for that.

The Toast : Women Who Have Gone Back in Time: An Annotated Ranking

Mon, 6 Jun 2016 18:15:43 +0000

Also, why no Maths or English or any other Muggle classes? I get that magic is why the kids are there and would push out other stuff, (.History of Magic instead of History, Potions instead of Science) but they still need basic skills to write their essays and work out how much eye of newt/do basic budgeting (although that might explain the Weasleys...). God knows how any of the students from the overseas schools learned English, unless their schools were better at Hogwarts in fitting Modern Foreign Languages into the curriculum. And the rules of Quidditch are ridiculous. One team is winning 14-0, and the other catches the snitch and wins the game? That. Is. Not. A. Sport. That is like playing 90 minutes of football, then deciding who wins based on a coin toss. Come at me, bro.

The Toast : The Wedding of Sir Gawain and Dame Ragnell

Fri, 27 May 2016 08:38:36 +0000

I feel like my answer to every question today should be: "even owls get married / so"

The Toast : David Beckham, Sexiest Man Alive

Wed, 25 Nov 2015 18:15:26 +0000

YES.

The Toast : Some People Eating Normally In Paintings, The Way People Eat

Fri, 21 Aug 2015 16:20:06 +0000

And if you haven't seen the amazing Bread Lion created by one of the bakers in this year's competition, have a look at this: <img src="https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2015/08/gbbo1.jpg?w=748&h=416&crop=1"/>

The Toast : A Partial But By No Means Exhaustive List Of What's Great About Period Dramas

Thu, 23 Apr 2015 17:23:54 +0000

A Knight's Tale was the first thing I ever saw Alan Tudyk in and I had no idea he wasn't British. And I AM British. So respectful fistbump to Alan Tudyk's accent. Plus there is nothing sexier than Heath Ledger dancing to Golden Years. *sigh*

The Toast : Things I've Learned About Heterosexual Female Desire From Decades Of Reading

Thu, 23 Apr 2015 11:50:24 +0000

Loki's hair always looks so greasy though, like he wants to remake "Rattle And Hum". I regret that I have but one thumbs-up to give to this comment.

The Toast : Portraits Of Lord Byron, In Order Of Lord Byron-ness

Thu, 23 Apr 2015 11:09:28 +0000

"Kill: Roman Byron because that is a really lame painting." Also, he's already dead, so you're ahead of the game.

The Toast : Twelve Classic Novels As Summarized By Someone Who Has Not Read Them

Wed, 1 Apr 2015 17:10:05 +0000

"Wow, that interior designer took the Gothic theme too far," he thought to himself. - The Bone Clocks It was a perfect day. The sky was blue and cloudless, the sand golden and soft under their feet. They wandered along the shore, paddling in the waves, then paused to buy an ice-cream. How lucky they were to be alive. - On The Beach "Yes, this one will do just fine," she said, pointing at the child. - A Suitable Boy "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS C**** IN HELL!" - Possession

The Toast : Twelve Classic Novels As Summarized By Someone Who Has Not Read Them

Wed, 1 Apr 2015 16:59:18 +0000

I somehow hadn't seen these and am now shaking with laughter, so thank you!

The Toast : Bejeweled Skeletons and Bee Curses

Wed, 18 Mar 2015 17:51:50 +0000

As well as the bottled witch, the Pitt Rivers also has shrunken heads. SHRUNKEN HEADS (which it is ethically conflicted about displaying, not that I cared about that as a child). It is the most Toast-y museum imaginable. Virtual tour here: http://www.prm.ox.ac.uk/virtualtour.html

The Toast : How To Tell If You Are In A Terry Pratchett Novel

Tue, 17 Mar 2015 14:16:25 +0000

You're a maiden, a mother or... the other one. You know that the natural size of a coven of witches is one. You are strongly suspicious of anyone who talks about The People, and doubt they have met any actual people. You know that the symptoms of madness are dribbling, talking to trees, and deciding that Ankh-Morpork needs a king. You believe that sin starts with treating people as things. (This is true.) THERE IS NO JUSTICE.THERE IS JUST YOU. (I have never missed an author as much as I miss Pratchett. His books basically built me.)