Mandyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!! I completely echo your thoughts about not blogging, not writing and feeling disconnected. Over the years, I've watched as others have come and gone from blogging, but this has been my year to take a break. I don't like it one bit. I feel isolated from friends whom I otherwise don't see (other than a chance meeting here and there) outside of the blogging world. And, it's hard to watch as others move ahead with their blogs, knowing I just don't have the capacity to do the same with mine. That's a long way of saying, what are the odds that you wrote AND I read on the exact same day?!? It must be our day! =) Happy weekend, friend!

Interesting that reading about death and dying is no longer of interest to you. Maybe it has to do with your renewed effort to focus on living and the people who make living so very worthwhile? While it saddens me to know how upsetting it was to lose your stepfather, it also warms my heart to know you have used that pause in your life to ensure your everyday is better than it was before.

My first and only trip to the Outer Banks was logged in late October - Sweets proposed to me there (10/22/2007!) ... I love that part of the Carolinas and will always have fond memories of my time there. Looks like OBX delivered some fabulous fall weather for you, just like it did for us so many years ago!

Awww, looks like you had a great time with Alli. For the record, this Jew HATES kugel ... then again, my brother likes to say I'm JewISH?, so maybe my vote doesn't count. =D

Ditto to what San says ... sounds totally magical, indeed!

Sounds heavenly. Enjoy your much deserved vacation!

I have always loved October, too. It's largely why Sweets and I chose to get married in this month and I'm convinced it's why Gavin insisted on coming two months early -- just so he could have an October birthday. =)

Have you ever been to the Outer Banks? I've only been once (in October!) - it's where Sweets and I got engaged! We stayed at the Inn on Pamlico Sound. It was such a special vacation (obviously). Can't wait to hear about your plans - and I love the nod to less time looking at your phone! =)

I'm not nice enough for others to take advantage of me. Ha. Well, I say that in jest, but it's also true. Here's the way I have looked at the general population of people: there is a spectrum that ranges from givers on one end to takers on the other end. The key is matching up the givers with the takers. The first step is figuring out where you fall on that spectrum (and over time, where you fall likely changes - I don't consider this a fluid situation).

You are definitely a giver, Mandy. You have a huge heart and would do almost anything to help the ones you love. Sure, that can lead to others taking advantage of your good intentions, but sometimes people just get used to you giving and giving and giving to the point where they expect that of you.

However, it sounds like you are evolving into someone who also realizes you have to give to yourself, which might just mean you can't give everything to everyone all the time. The problem is people who know you still think of you as this all-encompassing giver. So, it falls on you to educate them about where you stand today.

If the co-worker is a friend, then maybe give him the benefit of the doubt (you've given so much to him over the years that he doesn't consider his request to be "too much."). And, to that co-worker that indirectly or directly asked you to work on a planned vacation day, I might say, "You know, friend, if you had asked me that favor a year ago, I would have worked during my planned vacation. But, I've been teaching myself to be kinder to myself and today, my reality is I am really looking forward to that vacation day. In fact, I need that vacation day. I'm sorry I can't help you." That way, you don't have to give up your vacation day, but you also don't have to be mean about saying no. Plus, now that he knows you're trying to be kinder to yourself, maybe he keeps himself in check regarding what favors he asks you in the future.

So super cool the two of you got to spend some time together. Slowing down and taking in life is good for the soul, especially when shared with a treasured friend.

So cool that Lisa planned a trip to see you. I know she's not very happy with Charlotte, but it seems like a lot of her friends are benefiting from that - she's open to travel almost every weekend! You guys will have so much fun ... hugs to both of you!