Interstellar, I think?

I wanted to do something clever, rewrite "Funeral Blues" or quote all of the beautiful and hilarious things you all have said through the years that have made my corner of the universe a little bit brighter. When I was fighting with my parents, or having a rough time in school, or questioning whether I could ever be happy, you all were there, cheering me up and cheering me on. This place taught me that it's okay and good and possible to be kind, and strong, and funny, and weird, even in this brave new world, and for that I will be forever grateful.

This ending comes at the same time as so many beginnings: possibly leaving for a new denomination, applying to PhD programs, moving to a new city to start the next chapter with the love of my life after two years of painful long distance. I feel small, and unprepared, and afraid, and though I am sure this comment will be buried, I have to ask:

What is one piece of advice that guides you through life?

Thank you, thank you, thank you, forever and always.

Because I knew you, I have been changed for good.

Okay, but my mom middle-named me after Anne with an E, and I always secretly felt that it was a self-fulfilling prophecy because I turned out dreamy and bookish and outspoken, and so whenever someone mentions to me that they don't like AoGG, they have no idea but I feel PERSONALLY REJECTED.

Oh. Oh. This struck me so very close to the heart. I grew up in a deeply tribalistic, exclusionist denomination, and am currently struggling with the question of whether or not to leave.

"I’ve been searching through my own faith, trying desperately to hold onto it — a new form, the same essentials."

But you're right - that nagging question remains. What if they're right? What if I'm making a terrible mistake by choosing love over dogma and inclusivity over exclusion? I find myself again and again turning to Huck Finn's desperate proclamation: "All right then, I'll go to hell."

A year, specifically. I'm about to start a year off between Grad School and More Grad School, and this year is just going to be working and stressful applying to things and saving money so that I can close the difference with my partner. We're in an LDR and I am just very tired of this living situation and very ready to be with them.