Right, that's why I said "the difference is how they make me feel". If I'm truly on the ball with eating I follow a Primal or Paleo lifestyle for the ultimate in feel good living.

I too struggle with this. I have learned over time to shoot for 80% of my day being foods that I consider healthy. I like to stay away from gluten/wheat not necessarily carbs. This means that an OK food for me is the rice krispie bars at Starbucks -- because it's a better choice than the brownie. That said, if 80% of the food that I put in is on my "good" list the remaining 20% is still OK even if it's not ideal. For example, if I have a good protein based breakfast (say an egg, cheese, and ham omelet), and then a lunch of salad with protein then dinner can have a piece of bread with my protein and veggies. Or it could be the tortilla in a quesadilla, pasta in a meat base sauce, etc. There are many days when I have 100% "compliance" with my eating because I'm not worried about it. I don't stress over it. I know for myself the more I say I can't have something the more I want it. If I tell myself I can have it then I don't want it as much. I still want it, but I'm able to moderate it a bit more.

Another thing for me is teaching myself that no food is truly bad. We can assign labels all we want but all food breaks down to the same base components: fat, protein, carbohydrate, etc. It's all the same stuff. Broccoli isn't righteous and haagen-daz isn't a sin. They are all the same thing - what IS different is how they make me feel. If I want to have energy and feel good consistently then I know that a diet of sugar isn't going to work. But some sugar is OK. If I label a food bad or good, then I'm also labeling myself as good or bad. I don't have time to beat myself up if I choose a snickers & doritos for dinner instead of protein and veg. I have better things in my life to do!

It's about paying attention and being aware of yourself and not going on auto-pilot. If you are on auto-pilot you cease to be aware of what is going on and that is the path to being unhappy in the end.

Be kind to yourself too. You are un-learning a life of habits.