en-us https://www.intensedebate.com/users/9904653 Comments by cleo http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025332606 &lt;3 Tue, 5 Jul 2016 02:27:03 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025332606 http://the-toast.net/2016/06/30/things-lucy-maud-montgomery-lied-to-me-about/#IDComment1025291034 That is a good question. My guess is that some boys do. But I don&#39;t know any. The boys whose reading habits I know about did/do not read Anne (mostly my brother, my nephews, my cousin and my husband - which is not a big sample). I&#39;ve noticed that my 9 yo niece is really not interested in reading about boys and only reads stories about girls but her younger brother is still willing to read stories about girls - although he&#39;d frankly rather read about oceans and sea mammals. Mon, 4 Jul 2016 14:18:03 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/06/30/things-lucy-maud-montgomery-lied-to-me-about/#IDComment1025291034 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025191473 Thank you! I&#39;m proud of you too! Thank you for starting this thread.<br /><br />Trauma is weird. And recovering from it is weird - I can only speak from my own experience. I&#39;m a survivor of CSA - I was 11 - and I repressed almost all of the emotions surrounding it (not the actual memories though - I always knew what happened, I just was numb and in denial about it). <br /><br /><br />I&#39;ve had two big triggering events in my life where it honestly felt like some internal regulator said \"oh good, you&#39;re strong enough to deal with this now\" and opened the emotional floodgates. The first time was when I was 20 and after that I honestly thought the worst was past me. But no, when I was laid off at age 44, it felt like the next level of floodgates opened and it was just as overwhelming as the first time. <br /><br />The good news is that I had more than 20 years worth of healing to call on this time, so I did know how to weather it better. And as you say, it&#39;s a good chance to do emotional housekeeping. The other good thing is that trauma treatment has improved *dramatically* in the last 25 years - trauma-informed treatment didn&#39;t exist when I was 20 and it has helped me a lot in the past 10~15 years, and especially these last two.<br /><br /><br />Much love and strength to you as you heal. Sat, 2 Jul 2016 22:52:03 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025191473 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/go-on-get-out-of-here/#IDComment1025184453 &lt;3&lt;3&lt;3 Sat, 2 Jul 2016 20:05:35 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/go-on-get-out-of-here/#IDComment1025184453 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/go-on-get-out-of-here/#IDComment1025184328 &lt;3 Sat, 2 Jul 2016 20:02:41 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/go-on-get-out-of-here/#IDComment1025184328 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025139591 &lt;3 &lt;3 Sat, 2 Jul 2016 03:02:41 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025139591 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025139580 &lt;3 &lt;3 Sat, 2 Jul 2016 03:02:29 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025139580 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025139571 &lt;3 &lt;3 Sat, 2 Jul 2016 03:02:08 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025139571 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025127626 Brunch sounds more my speed. Is there a Chicago Toasties group somewhere I can join to find out more? Fri, 1 Jul 2016 21:47:02 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025127626 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025123817 &lt;3 ((((hugs))))) if you want them Fri, 1 Jul 2016 20:26:47 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025123817 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025123230 Huzzah for that! &lt;3 My brother had ideopathic anaphylaxis and that was a terrifying time (he was only in the ER once, but that was enough). His went away after a couple/few years and hasn&#039;t come back - according to his specialist that&#039;s v common. Good luck to you. Internet hugs if you want them. Fri, 1 Jul 2016 20:15:36 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025123230 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025117538 I don&#039;t think I would have seen the movie without the Toast comments - just one more way the Toast enriched my life.<br /><br />Sent from my iPhone Fri, 1 Jul 2016 18:31:04 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025117538 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025111782 I was laid off two years ago (after 17 years at the same place) and that reactivated my ptsd (after 20+ plus years of treatment I had been doing really well, thank you very much). Suddenly I was in this crazy situation where being un/under-employed was really hurting my mental health, but my mental health made it much harder to look for work. I&#039;d also realized that I&#039;d accidentally erased my queer identity when I married a man in 2001 - and let me tell you, the idea of coming out a second time in my 40s seemed much more daunting than coming out at 21. The Toast (along with Dear Author, AutoStraddle and Captain Awkward) accompanied me on this incredibly humbling journey of healing and rediscovery. The queer content, the comments by Toasties looking for work or freelancing, the opportunity to be a part of a community that values my encyclopedic knowledge of Anne of Green Gables and shape shifter romances, enthusiasm for objectively bad but subjective great movies, and ability to craft sarcastic but loving comments about classic books - all of these things helped me slowly find my feet. Today I am still looking for work but thanks to grace, SSRIs and therapy, I am in a much better place mental health wise. After freelancing for 2ish years, I&#039;m much more confident and know what kind of ft work I want. And I&#039;m slowly becoming more visible - I marched in Pride this month with my church and my husband wearing a brand new bi-pride flag t-shirt. I belong to a couple different queer groups. I&#039;m sure that the first open thread I ever posted in was about getting ready to go to my first ever queer book group - I was so afraid to go, but with the blessings of the Toasties, I went and I bravely (and semi casually) came out as both bi and married to a man and it went quite well. Thank you all. (The needle is tooooo heavy). Fri, 1 Jul 2016 16:47:05 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025111782 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025110393 I&#039;m sorry I won&#039;t be able to make the Chicago one! I&#039;ll toast you all long distance from Rogers Park. Fri, 1 Jul 2016 16:26:14 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/an-open-thread-and-sea-room/#IDComment1025110393 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/a-note-on-the-toast/#IDComment1025108843 Good point! Thank you brave moderators!!!!! Fri, 1 Jul 2016 16:02:10 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/a-note-on-the-toast/#IDComment1025108843 http://the-toast.net/2016/06/30/things-lucy-maud-montgomery-lied-to-me-about/#IDComment1025106929 It was a long time ago and we&#039;re no longer coworkers. Thank goodness. He was creepy for many other reasons. It was a weird conversation. He told me I reminded him of Anne and I was like, omg, I looved those books growing up. And he was like, books? There were books? Fri, 1 Jul 2016 15:30:35 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/06/30/things-lucy-maud-montgomery-lied-to-me-about/#IDComment1025106929 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/a-note-on-the-toast/#IDComment1025104416 Yes. I was going to post that same excerpt. So true and so powerful. Fri, 1 Jul 2016 14:50:59 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/a-note-on-the-toast/#IDComment1025104416 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025099640 House keeping question. Where&#039;s the RSS feed follow button? Fri, 1 Jul 2016 13:38:03 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025099640 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025099367 Thank you Nicole!! I did not always have time to read the links, but I loved reading the round up. Dearest Toasties. What Gifts of the Toast are you taking with you? What Gifts do you want to give to each other? I&#039;m taking with me the gift of self knowledge - The Toast has helped me be much more comfortable with my queer identity and been a tremendous help in my journey to be more visibly bi while married to a wonderful cis man. And the sword of Oh Hell No to cut through misogynistic nonsense. May you all be too witches. Fri, 1 Jul 2016 13:33:19 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025099367 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025098937 (((((HUGS)))))) &lt;3 &lt;3 &lt;3 &lt;3 Fri, 1 Jul 2016 13:26:10 +0000 http://the-toast.net/2016/07/01/the-final-link-roundup/#IDComment1025098937