Women, Here are Four Reasons Your Online Dating Profiles are Giving You Headaches Comments

Felisha

Sat, 10 Sep 2011 09:34:11 +0000

My parents met each other, thanks to a dating agency some 30 years back and back then, they were using journal books/ledgers to list down the details and candidates. So, 30 years forward, we have online dating sites to help speed things up and a better option to meet people from every part of the world. So, to me, online dating sites are just another stepping stone for us to meet people who can potentially be our partners, and if not, hey, friends can do. Enlarging our circle of networks, why not. Kill two birds with a stone. Haha.. Anyway, my point is, a lot of users wrote different things in their profiles. Some are really cliche, some just plain boring, some are very exciting and interesting, and each of these profiles can actually attract people(time frame, or when, is another different story :P). There are many many thousands of profiles to read, person yet to meet, so, if we read some profiles or get some messages from people whom we do not really like(mainly because of the profile or maybe the personality), hey, move on, haha. Anyways, interesting article! Thanks for sharing your thoughts BR

bigbabyweezus

Thu, 8 Sep 2011 14:32:58 +0000

When I was single, a male friend of mine talked me into joining a dating site, because he was doing it at the same time. He actually wrote my profile for me, and then turned it over to me for editing. I think he probably did a better job of encapsulating who I am than I could have, and it was probably more accurate. So, it doesn't hurt to have someone else help...or at least review the profile to see if it raises any red flags for lack of self-awareness.

Myrtle

Wed, 7 Sep 2011 07:19:29 +0000

I met the cutest guy online and he was just as cute in person. Also smart and owned his own studio. I met him there and we hit it off immediately. So naturally I choked and started talking about his work with him and he gave me a tour- then offered me a job. I really suck at dating.

dostoevsky

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 22:22:27 +0000

I deleted my honest and heartfelt profile, and replaced it with an absurd, bare bones one. I've gotten twice as many messages and they're still all terrible. Moral of the story, I hate OKC and I don't know why I continue to use it.

EBone

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 22:02:38 +0000

My friend found her husband on a dating site ten years ago. I helped her pay for her divorce three months ago. He cleaned her out, emotionally and financially. I know this isn't how it goes 99.9% of the time, but it's my only anecdote for the article, so there you have it.

Ms_Print

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 21:52:18 +0000

I've been married for something like, oh I don't know, let's round it off to ~ 600 mostly happy years, so I missed out on the whole online dating thing. Now you have me thinking about trying to write one of those, and it is mildly terrifying. I'm pretty sure I would be a stress case, trying too hard to sound like I was not trying too hard. Makes my butt cheeks clench just thinking about it! Hats off to the folks who can do it well.

deleted8986766

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 19:09:17 +0000

I am not a big traveler, but I feel like I can't admit it to anyone or they'll be like OMG YOU UNCULTURED SHMUCK. I mean, I love roadtrips and camping, but I prefer not to have to go too far, and I hate flying. There's only so many 24 hour car trips I can stand. But yeah, I feel like if I were honest about that, people would immediately judge me as some kind of total loser, which is unfair because I am only like 60% loser.

deleted4427282

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 19:05:57 +0000

I gave up on online dating a looooonnnnngggg time ago. I can't distinguish between real people and the sociopaths anymore. Also, the emails, THE EMAILS. OKCupid was the worst for sending 3,094,834,394,035 emails everyday. It felt like harassment. And, lastly, the real reason I don't participate in online dating sites: I'm lazy. I never finish my profile and I can't keep up with people. Facebook, when I'm on it, keeps me busy enough. With that being said, I still believe online dating is a viable option. For one, my mom met her husband online and they are perfectly suited to each other, and many friends/clients have done the same. To some it up, online dating requires effort and motivation, neither of which I have.

deleted2856504

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 19:04:01 +0000

I love traveling. The vast majority of my coworkers do not and look at me sideways when they ask what I've got planned for the holidays. Vacations for them is either the Hamptons, Disney World, or if they're feeling especially exotic, a week at an all inclusive resort in the Caribbean. So if I were picking a potential mate, knowing that someone likes to travel internationally would be important information. As for putting that on your resume, that's just stupid. Might as well say "I'm going to require A LOT of vacation time."

DorothyBarker

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 19:01:02 +0000

Hilarious. The "I never thought I'd be doing this..." thing is so played. Get over it, folks, we're all here. Own it. But my on-line dating profile pet peeve? People who say, "My friends think I'm funny" or "I'm funny..." and their profile displays not the slightest TRACE of wit or humor. First rule of writing, people: show, don't tell.

Sprinkles

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 18:55:29 +0000

While working in customer support I have seen many people get burned out on travel and start trying to refuse it. Continued interest in and willingness to travel is often seen as an asset.

deleted6011313

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 18:30:45 +0000

Online dating is sooooooo tedious and slogging through the most boring people on earth is exhausting until you find someone who seems nice (that is when a female will respond because all the creeps ruin it for the rest of us and make the women, rightfully so, judicious to the extreme). That being said, I have a date on Sunday with a lovely young woman that I've been texting and talking to for a week or so now. So I'm not sure why I sound so bitter about online dating up top; maybe because it took 9 months to get a single solitary date.

deleted5993187

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 18:14:23 +0000

I also hate people who love to talk about their love of traveling in their profile. Really, you also like traveling the world? How interesting! If you also like eating and fucking we might actually have a good thing going here. I once actually saw someone place "international travel" on the interests section of their RESUME. I forwarded it to all my friends and told them to never hire that idiot. I think that while a lot of people have an online dating profile, plenty of people mate without the need of one. Online dating can be fun but it usually sucks and ends up costing you a lot if you are a guy. While the majority of people try online dating or have a profile somewhere, most seem to yearn to meet someone in the real world, and are open to making dates without an online introduction. And while I'm off the market, for the sake of my single friends, I hope the world never devolves into people giving out OKCupid profile IDs instead of a phone number.

deleted195313

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 18:11:55 +0000

Here's a hint from a Gay for the Straight Lady Frienz: if your profile reads like a Cosmo article, you will only get a guy who thinks you're stupid. Cosmo articles are composed of tips. The tips are tipped to trick a git into a trip where she is thinking her shit is fit to remit, to a twit who only wants to get his tip in her pantypit. You will have more success if you just cut and paste the italicized sentences into your profile summary.

Blix!

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 18:07:33 +0000

Chlamydia?

rina

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 18:02:55 +0000

As I have mentioned here before, it's the pictures that kill me. I have exactly no full-body shots that I'd be willing to put on line, and it's not that I'm totally ashamed of my body, it's just that it looks awful in pictures. Anyway, that's what kills the online dating for me. So sadly, I've just registered for a bunch of singles events. Sigh.

Jenna

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 18:00:31 +0000

"Your dating profile might benefit from similar things, to let you pre-sift candidates who might not appreciate you giggling at the Soon/Now pics." I like the way you think. "OKCupid, Match, Chemistry, PlentyofFish, etc."<---I'd actually read a male/female Crass breakdown comparison of those, though I'm aware this isn't the first discussion of online dating on this site. Just the first one written by a male commenter. Maybe that isn't necessary or I'm fascinated due to lack of familiarity. I get the sense that the people who are most successful in them don't need them as much. It's a supplement to what they'd find anyway face-to-face. (But what do I know.) Thanks Scrlrncutter

labyrinthine_

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 17:50:45 +0000

Yes. Apparently all the young people are completely socially stunted. Blame the facebooks! It's all the fault of the gosh darn twitters! *shakes cane, get off my lawn, et cetera*

achilleselbow

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 17:46:51 +0000

This is all good advice. Another pet peeve I'd add to #2 is things like "I love hanging out with my friends and having fun!" Oh, really? Who would've thought? Personally, I like hanging out with people I hate and being miserable. Honestly though, I tend to believe that people who write things like that in their profile are being truthful and actually just don't have very interesting personalities, so I don't know if the advice will work for everyone. On another note, is this just a thing that everyone has to do now? Are we at the point where if you're below a certain age it's just assumed that you have an online dating profile, the way it's just assumed that you're on Facebook? Is there like no hope for people who refuse to participate for whatever reason?

GenderFenderBender

Tue, 6 Sep 2011 17:43:28 +0000