en-us https://www.intensedebate.com/users/762983 Comments by vhg5003 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/how-am-i-not-a-racist__trashed/#IDComment69843876 I mean I do not think you’re a racist, obviously. In our lives, we all get like that. We all get a little cocky. I know there have been many times where I have thought I was better than someone (bad, I know, oh well)—but we all do it. In your case, you were in lesser developed countries, so, of course, you would think you have more of a shot at life than they do…..because you do. But I see what you’re saying, there is a fine line between thinking you’re superior and acting superior (with actions/word etc.) I guess the line between the superiority feelings is basically if you would actually want to help these people develop and reach a level where they have a fighting chance (which I’m thinking if you were in a lesser developed country in the first place, then yea, you are empathetic). I don’t know, I think it’s mostly a thing everyone does--- a lot of people try to be better than someone else: whether it is at sports, dress better, think you’re prettier, better looking, skinnier, cooler etc. It’s not one of our best traits, clearly, but as long we know the line between competitive and actually suppressing another type of person with our actions or words—then I think we are all going to be just fine. Fri, 23 Apr 2010 00:22:56 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/how-am-i-not-a-racist__trashed/#IDComment69843876 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment69842963 I would never have even thought he was in prison, if he hadn’t said (or I hadn’t previously known about Sam’s visits with the “lifers”). That was really amazing, and I thank you so much for sharing. Honestly. That letter (?) really opened my eyes, and, in a way, warmed my heart. His words really do ring true—no matter where we are, who we are, what we are—when we see human suffering, all hatred or ill sentiment is, mostly, erased. Usually replaced with raw emotion—the vulnerable, sometimes scary feeling of real human empathy. We are all human and we all go through our own battles each and every day. The person you smile at who smiles back, may have just found out her grandma died. The person you wave at, may be feeling lonelier than anyone could ever really understand. But this letter… it really kind of refreshes (and in a way restores) my faith in human kind. Sometimes I feel like the whole world is one really, truly messed up place with all the wars, murders, sadness, and loneliness. I guess you don’t have a lot of chances to get inside someone’s head, like we just got to do with this enlightened man. I am kind of at a loss of words about this—I don’t know I just feel like if people in prison--where many have committed the cruelest act a human can do--- can find a brighter day and understand the true emotion of suffering but the power of a gesture to lessen someone’s suffering, then this world is going to be A.OK. Fri, 23 Apr 2010 00:14:27 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment69842963 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/300000-whats-it-mean-to-us__trashed/#IDComment69840502 Unfortunately, that’s the way we are…. As a nation, and as humans. It is human nature to try and forget the rough times (and that includes sad incidents or memories). I agree with you completely. I actually think about that a lot. I know I would absolutely be a mess if anything at all happened to my family or a friend. But somehow, when these HUGE tragedies happens in a land far, far away—it’s easier to just forget and let go. Maybe it’s because we don’t want to think about it? Or feel guilty, or feel obligated to do something. I know sometimes I feel really terrible when I start thinking about the world and the numerous horrible things going on. I feel almost trapped—like I can’t do anything. So I find it easier not to think about it as much, unfortunately. However, there’s the occasional times when something really does hit me --- like the book we read about slave trade. I am absolutely REPULSED by the slave trade industry and I have really been making a truly conscious effort to watch what I buy, where I buy it etc. When I see wal-mart and K-mart and all those other little chain stores, all I can think of is the poor children’s faces, the bodies that were literally ripped apart and beaten. I feel the older we get, the more we try to forget things. We get caught up in our own life, our schoolwork, our relationships, our social life— most of us are in our own bubble. I know I am. I am happily living in this little bubble we call Penn State—where the majority of what I think about is my dwindling meal points, my lion cash, what party I’m going to this weekend, what homework I have. It is unfortunate, yes, but I do not think we can completely blame ourselves for not thinking about it. We are in such a whirlwind time of our life where everything is happening at once—whether we’re figuring out what we want to do with our lives, or simply just trying to get through the day. In high school, I was pretty aware of everything that was going on—but that’s because we were being tested on it in different ways. In some ways, I kind of hope that when I get older and get a job, I will be more aware and conscientious to all the tragedies, and do the best I can to bring help (as well as awareness). What you said is true, we are all people—and though these things happen on the other side of the world, they are real. They are real people’s lives, real people’s brothers/sisters/moms/dads/aunts/uncles/friends etc. I hope that I can find a balance between feeling terribly guilty and sad, with being aware and trying to help as much I can. Thu, 22 Apr 2010 23:52:53 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/300000-whats-it-mean-to-us__trashed/#IDComment69840502 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-about-the-men__trashed/#IDComment68290165 This is funny because I was just having this conversation with my friend. Just on this campus (but definitely not limited to- I see this phenomena everywhere) I see so many pretty girls with not so good looking guys. There have been so many times where I will see a great girl—good personality, body, looks etc. with a chubby guy or a really different looking guy that does not fit the “pretty boy” stereotype. I think a lot of it is based off of the fact that girls really take personality into consideration. If a guy isn’t good-looking, but he is funny—automatic in. If a guy isn’t muscular, but he’s sweet—automatic in. There are so many things that girls look for, and being “hot” is but a small, minor aspect. When I talk to guys, they say , hands down, looks are the majority of what they look for. Let’s be serious, if a girl is chubby and not very attractive (in the cookie cutter “beautiful” stereotype) is a guy even going to take a second look at her? No. Maybe she will be put in the friend category, but that is as far as it will go. Perhaps a certain type of guy tries to fit these impossible standards that magazines/Hollywood gives—by getting “big” or being tan or wearing nice clothes, but there is no way it even levels to the amount that girls put into their appearance and body image. Thu, 15 Apr 2010 23:46:26 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-about-the-men__trashed/#IDComment68290165 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/women__trashed/#IDComment68289198 I agree, we are all women and we are all beautiful. Unfortunately, nowadays—we don’t think so. I know I have battled with body issues for probably my entire life. I’ve never been overweight—I’ve just never been skinny enough (in my mind). In college, my body loathing has unfortunately only gotten worse. Guys base everything on looks -99% of the time. One of my friends told me to go that STUPID website “College ACB” –BAD DECISION. These poor girls are getting torn apart. Some of my friends who have been posted about on that website have been so beaten down by these comments. People call them ugly, or chubby—which when I look at them, they are skinnier than me, so I’m like “damn, I need to lose weight.” I hate that this is what our world has come to. Women are getting increasing more conscientious about our body image. I have had many anorexic and bulimic friends—isn’t that saying something? These Hollywood images of beautiful people give us impossible standards. I wish I could say that we shouldn’t be comparing ourselves to this, but I can’t—because I still am. I have not grown enough as a person, and looked inside myself to find a good medium yet. I know I am still on this journey, as many, if not most, women are. It is one of the hardest things I have had to deal with but maybe someday it will get easier to truly see that we are all beautiful people. Thu, 15 Apr 2010 23:37:01 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/women__trashed/#IDComment68289198 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/christian-invaders-the-turnaround__trashed/#IDComment68287568 Today’s class was by far the best class I have come to thus far. I have been waiting for someone to come out and say all of this stuff for quite some time now and I am so unbelievably happy that Sam did. Honestly, while he was talking, I really connected to every word he was saying. How could we, as people, be so dumb to believe that we WOULDN’T fight if people were doing this? We are a warring nation and if anyone, ANYONE at all even tried to pull half the stuff we do (including this manifest destiny garbage)---we would be up in arms, literally. We, as a country, would be freaking out and assembling troops, hate groups, militia, etc. anything at all to take these “enemies” down. The United States would, in my opinion, be doing much, much worse than what the middle eastern nations are doing to us. Now, I am not about fighting—I voted that I’m against wars and I stand by that. In 2003, I went to the largest peace demonstration in Washington D.C. because I truly hope and believe in a calmer and a more peaceful tomorrow. Obviously in the past few years, this hope has been dwindling. As time goes on, this war we are in gets more and more confusing. Why are we there? Didn’t President George W. Bush say we we’re “going in” because there were weapons of “mass destruction?” That is the excuse he gave to the American people, so how come when people (like John McCain) say it is a war for oil, no one is outraged? We have gone into a nation- destroyed their homes, killed their families, pillaged their cities, mocked their culture, and that’s not even the worst part. The worst part is that some people still believe we are doing GOOD. Please tell me how in the WORLD we are making for a better tomorrow? If anything, we are contributing—no actually, we are CAUSING—the hate that will be directed toward us in the future. I am disgusted. I have grown up traveling the world and I absolutely hate the fact that it’s a different world now—when I travel nowadays, I have had such animosity toward the word “American.” Why? Because we meddle in things that we should not be meddling in. It truly breaks my heart. Don’t get me wrong, I love my country, and we have truly done some great things—but we have let the “fame” and pride get to our heads. We are not the policemen of the world. It’s sad when you see a Muslim or Arab and you automatically think terrorist—we have waged a war on an entire nation, when really it was an extremist group that we should be worried about. Just because we have the KKK, does that mean other countries should base their entire image of America on these extremists? HECK no. So why are we doing it?!?! We don’t want future generations to hate us for what our country did; we don’t want children growing up asking why America is, essentially, a terror to the world, and we don’t want our children cleaning up OUR mess. Sam really touched a sensitive topic with me and I am so happy he did. More people need to get this into their heads—and I think he did get through to people by the results of joining the fight against “enemies” who are doing what AMERICA is doing. We have the power to change this—and work for a better image, a better reputation, and a better tomorrow. Thu, 15 Apr 2010 23:21:24 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/christian-invaders-the-turnaround__trashed/#IDComment68287568 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-might-be-the-second-step__trashed/#IDComment66845064 Honestly, I have no idea what the second step is. I left class on Thursday feeling the exact same way. I know we can just stop eating chocolate, but will that ever be enough? There has to be something else, but perhaps it comes with time—a world movement that causes a large scale change to be made. People should never have to work in slavery—those children worked for their “master” because they thought they were going to be paid, and then they weren’t---that should never happen. In a world like ours (and country like ours) unfortunately we are based off of a constantly consuming way of life. It will be hard to change the ways that American’s live their daily lives, truthfully, I think it might be impossible unless there is more awareness. Somehow, there needs to be an incident that is made very public, or a campaign or something (anything) that really gets to the hearts of everyone. I wish it was mandatory for every single person to take SOC119, because then maybe their views might be a little different. Step two will be hard to find, but hopefully in time, it will become clearer to see. Fri, 9 Apr 2010 18:00:09 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-might-be-the-second-step__trashed/#IDComment66845064 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/this-is-totally-off-the-hook__trashed/#IDComment66843742 This is disgusting. I am appalled. Watching this video made me realize how far people think we’ve come where in reality, we have not made that big of leaps in rights/freedom/thinking etc--- but now the horrid things that used to be out in the open are either swept under the rug or come out in different ways: like this game. This “rape” game just once again highlights what is wrong with our world—they are making something that should be a very, very uncommon and looked down upon thing, seem very normal and common. It even shows a game where it is revenge on a woman—where they stalk her and rape her multiple times. How is this possible that people could make this game? I am at a loss for words—other than it just makes me really sad to see that. How NOT far we’ve come. This just breeds a society and culture that is bound for bad things. When kids can play a game where they physically take advantage of a woman, something is wrong—and it shows the people playing it that it is not a big deal. In a way, I feel as though many would become numb to it, just like Americans are sometimes numb to killing people in video games (which, I don’t see much difference in ours vs. the rape game). Either way, these people need to see the detrimental damage they are doing to this world. It is not okay. Fri, 9 Apr 2010 17:54:19 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/this-is-totally-off-the-hook__trashed/#IDComment66843742 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/how-can-we-ever-win__trashed/#IDComment65342673 Honestly, you can never really “win,” when you say one thing, there will always be someone saying the exact opposite. However, with these L L bean photos, I agree with Sam. Diversity (in color) is added to these catalogues but only in a sideways kind of way. Many people see these pictures and they may not allocate the black people into a category right away—simply because they are, in a way, made to be white. They have the typical yacht shorts on, a cardigan, loafers. Seriously, I have seen very few black people ever wearing an outfit like that. Now, I’m not saying there aren’t plenty who do, but it’s just not the uniformly accepted stereotype or image we, as people, have. When Sam said he looked for a black person wearing shorts and could only find his own TA—that says something. Truthfully, if you’re really that offended by some of the stuff that he said then maybe you haven’t opened your mind enough yet to get to the next stage—understanding things a little bit clearer. I think that is the main point he is trying to make with these different arguments: we are all in different stages and, depending on our understanding and stage, we see things a little bit different from the person sitting next to us. Thu, 1 Apr 2010 22:53:47 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/how-can-we-ever-win__trashed/#IDComment65342673 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/those-damn-dolls__trashed/#IDComment65337372 This video honestly made me tear up in class. Our society and even some of the world, has such a messed up and skewed view of beauty. How dare majority propaganda make these girls, much less anyone, feel inferior. It is yet another problem with the blind eye for diversity. No one really wants to accommodate all these different types of people---they cater to only those that will make them money. This vision of beauty being only white is going to cause these girls detrimental harm in the future. Self-loathing is especially prevalent in women---and nowadays, it is not just the color of your skin that makes you feel ugly or bad. It’s how your body looks or hair or skin---why aren’t you 20 pounds less? Why don’t your thighs look like sticks? Why isn’t your hair straightened everyday? It’s disgusting. This society is really destroying women and their perceptions of themselves. I cannot even tell you how many of my friends have eating disorders—in high school, one of my friends burst out crying after eating ONE grape during the day. ONE. GRAPE. Mind you, she is one of the prettiest girls I know (and I’m not just saying that). She views herself as ugly, just like these black children are going to do. It is not right and it needs to be changed. Thu, 1 Apr 2010 22:34:51 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/those-damn-dolls__trashed/#IDComment65337372 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/revisioning-the-revisioning-stage__trashed/#IDComment65335154 Although I grew up in a primarily white region—New England is somewhat known for being the majority white—I was thrown into a stage of awareness from early on. Since my parents have found it a necessary part of my education to travel to different parts of the world, I started at a young age immersing myself into different cultures. I rode a camel in Portugal, bargained in Tunisia, etc. I understood a somewhat difficult concept in the most basic sense: these people were different from me—I didn’t know why and I didn’t exactly understand how, but I knew they were. As I got older, I began to further develop my questions (as well as answers) when I began to realize the complete lack of diversity in the schooling system of New Hampshire. From first to sixth grade, I believe I had maybe at most 10 black people in my school. From seventh to twelfth grade, I had even less—perhaps 5 black people maximum. I remember asking questions to my parents in seventh grade about why I didn’t have any people of color in my school. Their answers were always somewhat broad and I would occasionally get a speech from my dad. He talked about how the north often sees themselves as elite and open-minded, as well as accepting of everyone—though there are no black people. My dad, who grew up in Alabama, had many black friends and went to a primarily black high school. I knew maybe two colored people in the north, where he knew and was friends with a good number, in the south. It was really then that I started to question more and more about race relations. In high school, we had a discussion in our ethics class about “black people” (like they were some far off fairytale characters) and almost all the people in the class said that the north is the most unbiased and accepting of blacks—yet, with the two black kids in my school one was referred to as “fresh off the boat” and the other one was referred to as a kid who is an “oreo”—black on the outside, white on the inside. I gave the example of my father’s high school experience and got shut down with “they’re all racist down there.” Honestly, although I was not thrown into the revisioning stage at a young age (though I did travel and immerse myself in different culture in other ways), I did get thrown into a sort of awakening stage that only progressed from sixth grade on—questioning the lack of diversity instead of questioning the diversity within my schooling career. It was a backwards sort of way to go about the different stages, but I’m glad I did it this way because it gave me a keen understanding of diversity over my high school peers, and obviously, now that I’m in college, I have found my transition into a more diverse community easier than I would have normally. Thu, 1 Apr 2010 22:27:04 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/revisioning-the-revisioning-stage__trashed/#IDComment65335154 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/whats-the-big-deal-with-periods__trashed/#IDComment64071671 Periods are a very weird topic. I know that, as a girl, I feel so awkward if it’s even brought up in front of a guy—no matter how close of a friend he is. I have a lot of guy friends and I’ve come to realize that many of them hate periods: period talk, period materials, period anything. They hate it. I watch their faces get uncomfortably red or their mannerisms become very awkward when there is even a commercial. Honestly, maybe they need to be more educated on the menstrual system. Not only do we have it hard by “bleeding” once a month, but guys don’t understand it so they are insensitive to all that is a period. Another annoying misconception is definitely the PMS side of the period---I can’t tell you how many times I have been a little quieter than usual or maybe a little snippier, and guys will automatically blame it on PMS. No, I am not PMS-ing everytime I don’t want to talk to you, thank you very much. Honestly, I think in school starting from a young level people need to be teaching these kids about both bodies and what they go through, instead of this complete lack of knowledge where guys feel nervous when they see a Midol commercial on the television. What good is that? Girls should not be feeling disconnected because they have a period. Honestly—I think guys should be pretty happy. We are the ones who are fertile and have to go through the pain of having a child, not them. They get to watch and hold our hand as it happens. I don’t know why it’s such a weird topic---I guess people are afraid of what they don’t know about. Therefore when guys hear the word period or see a tampon, there is an immediate diversion of eyes and topic. I’m not going to lie, even I don’t really fully understand what a period is, what it does, and how it effects your body. I know enough, yes, just from experience. But, I think we could all use a little elementary school lesson on the basics while stressing the importance of what exactly a period is—the beauty of it, of being fertile, of being able to create another life. It really is a miracle. A period is something that should be celebrated, not something that should be swept under the rug as some embarrassing thing that happens once a month—an annoying visit from “Aunt Flow.” I know when I was a camp counselor for a couple summers, whenever a girl would get her period—we would make a point to have a “period party.” Our party consisted of wearing all red, drinking red bug juice, and snacking on junk food. We did this to let the embarrassed girl know that it wasn’t something to be afraid of or nervous about. We celebrated her growing up and coming into her own instead of quickly washing her sheets, handing her a tampon, and never speaking about it again. Thu, 25 Mar 2010 18:01:26 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/whats-the-big-deal-with-periods__trashed/#IDComment64071671 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64071570 If men could menstruate, I still think we would have to pay for tampons, unfortunately. I mean we all eat, we a drink water, we all need shelter---and we all pay for those things. I wish that we didn’t have to pay for tampons and pads but if men were in on the whole bleeding once a month thing, I do not believe that it would change much. We would still have “sport” tampons and “gentle” tampons and “super” tampons and “pearl tampons” etc. We have a variety now---and with men involved, it would just stay the same. Perhaps the period products would be cheaper because a lot more people would be buying them—but it still costs money to make tampons, pads, “female hygiene products” etc. However, maybe if men got their periods they would not feel so awkward about the topic anymore and try to understand it better and understand the human body better—that’s the real problem---not the period and its products, but the understanding of what a period actually means as a human being and a woman. Also, I think if men had their periods, there would be more commercials promoting periods and tampons in a more direct light, rather than the ones we have now that completely beat around the bush. I saw one the other day where a woman said, “Man I am so craving chocolate right now….you know what that means!” Actually a lot of people don’t, so maybe you should just say it for everyone to hear. Thu, 25 Mar 2010 18:00:40 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64071570 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-are-all-of-you-thinking-about-asians__trashed/#IDComment64071453 I actually feel as though I really need to learn a lot more about Asians. I am sad to say that it is very, very hard for me to distinguish between Asians and Asian Americans. I know very little about the culture, really only what I hear on the news or read in books. I think that Asians are definitely looked at different—stereotypically most definitely, and in sort of a anti-social and cliquey light. I’m not saying that this is true but I know this is how a lot of people that I’ve talked to about this subject feel. My neighbors are Asian—and many times I’ve seen that there is a huge cultural barrier. They never come to floor meetings or floor events. They don’t know any of our names. They only hang out with Asians at very late hours. They skype with their parents back home in China at 4 a.m. almost every day (I can hear everything). I think it is definitely a cultural difference that we all need to work more on understanding. What makes an Asian American and who Asians really are. By doing that and coming to a better understanding of the culture and the people, I think relations would be ameliorated and people would start looking at more of the individual rather than the race. Thu, 25 Mar 2010 17:59:49 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-are-all-of-you-thinking-about-asians__trashed/#IDComment64071453 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-happens-to-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment62855866 I think that this kind of thing is the whole point of the course: to realize we are not all one color or have one association. Just like today with the survey, many people associate themselves with different things whether it’s “American” or “Irish American” or “African American”—we are all different and we can never fully categorize ourselves. Just like when Sam talked about those little boxes on college applications: checking off if we are white, black, Hispanic, Native American---how can one ever fully classify themselves into a category like this. It is normal for your friend to feel confused because, of course, he doesn’t know which to associate himself with. It’s a weird topic, most definitely, because it really depends on how he was brought up, his culture etc. There are other factors, like Sam always says, that play into what one associates themselves with. Undoubtedly, we are meant to be confused. I know people in this class who used to just associate themselves as white (even though they varied in culture). Now, they are more confused because the borders of white and black have turned grey. There really isn’t one set answer or one set association, a lot of outside factors play a large role and I think that’s what Sam is trying to teach us. Thu, 18 Mar 2010 23:43:21 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-happens-to-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment62855866 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/does-this-rudeness-thing-cut-both-ways__trashed/#IDComment62854788 Sometimes in Soc119, I feel as though it can be a one-way street. Even though we are actually learning that we aren’t so different and we have very skewed perceptions of each other and different races, people still tend to default back to their tendencies of close-mindedness and the fact that “everyone’s out to get me.” When white people said rude things--- the black people addressed it with gasps and shakes of the head in a negative and disgusted fashion. Sam even addressed the comments. However, when black people said rude things, there was very little said. The black people DID say rude things but many times I think we feel as though we can’t get mad because of what they went through. We are still being “awakened” just like we’ve been talking about in class. We are unsure of our boundaries and what’s okay to say and what is not okay to say. I don’t think black people should be testing those boundaries because it just isn’t fair. It’s like the little sibling who never gets in trouble and the older sibling who is “supposed to know better.” It’s not fair, we are all equally accountable for our actions. Enough with the conflicting sides—the whole point of the class is to shy away from those rude comments to better and more fully understand each other and where we are all coming from. Thu, 18 Mar 2010 23:34:35 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/does-this-rudeness-thing-cut-both-ways__trashed/#IDComment62854788 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/prom-or-no-prom-just-dont-let-the-queer-students-dance-together__trashed/#IDComment62853944 This is despicable. How can we say that we live in a free and open democracy when this sort of garbage is still going on? Schools need to get with the times, as do some hardcore conservatives who can’t handle change. Like I’ve said before, I went to a hardcore catholic conservative high school—believe me, I have heard it all—including that gays are “gross” and shouldn’t “touch each other in public.” Is this really what our world is coming to? Canceling a prom to try and hinder a looming change that is absolutely inevitable. I had a run-in with this sort of thing once in my high school career—not to this extent—but it still rubbed me the wrong way. At a school with people who claim to be holy, righteous, open, loving, kind (you know, all the normal religious convictions) there seemed to be something hypocritical going on one night at our homecoming dance. A girl in my grade who was known in the school by teachers and students for being openly lesbian(we were sophomores) brought a girl to the dance. My fellow peer is a nice, sweet, smart girl who really never did anything wrong—except (apparently) at this dance. When she and her date were both dancing together, in their dresses, having a good time our principal came up to them and asked them to leave. When they asked why, he said “We don’t condone that sort of thing here.” Wait a second, didn’t Jesus say you should be accepting of all different kinds of people. Didn’t he hang out with lepers who were in the drugs of society? Instead the vice-principal and the rest of the teachers who were chaperoning the dance backed up my principal. The two girls were escorted out and asked not to attend any more dances if this was how it was going to be. These girls were completely embarrassed and not only did they feel ashamed but they wasted their time and money on buying a fancy dress for this event—as well as the cost of the ticket. Honestly, I was disgusted. How can people seriously think that by holding people back like that, that it is ACTUALLY going to hold an entire movement back. That is just not going to happen. Evolution is a constant thing—we evolve, our ideas evolve, government evolves—and canceling a prom is not going to stop that. Instead, this poor girl who got her high school prom canceled because of her is going to feel terrible repercussions of her school’s actions, not her own. She is going to be demoralized and made to feel like she is doing something very wrong, when in reality she probably didn’t choose this. How dare a school pick on a kid who doesn’t really have anyone to back her up. Those people are bullies and should seriously be reprimanded for their disgusting actions. They are going to leave hurtful scars on those kid’s self-esteem—just like my teachers did to the girl at my school. Thu, 18 Mar 2010 23:27:41 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/prom-or-no-prom-just-dont-let-the-queer-students-dance-together__trashed/#IDComment62853944 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/a-long-long-way-indeed__trashed/#IDComment59780715 I think that slaveholders would be shocked, confused, and most likely speechless. Back in the eighteen hundreds, in the pre-civil war era---these slaves were property, expensive property, but property nonetheless. They didn’t know how to read, write, much less make a lot of money (enough for the “bling” nowadays that seems to define most celebrities). I mean if they saw the rap videos of people like fifty cent or lil wayne, maybe they would be a little disgusted---although, I do not think they would know what half the words being said were. It has been a long way since slavery in the sense that the culture has changed, the world has changed—where black people were then (the lowest of the low) is very different to where they are now (the president). I think mostly, the slave owners would be very curious about the culture and nature of our world today in correlation with black people. I mean, sure, maybe in the most extreme cases there would be slave owners absolutely freaking out, appalled at what our country “has come to” and possibly a conversation about how the confederacy was the best—but for the most part, I think curiosity would prevail above all else. Thu, 4 Mar 2010 19:50:09 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/a-long-long-way-indeed__trashed/#IDComment59780715 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment59779550 I’m a little confused on this comment---I know I have never, ever been to a themed party that was racially geared toward black people. Yes, I have done the “Jersey Shore” parties---but first and foremost, that is not geared toward black people, and secondly, it is a television show! There is nothing against that: if those people put themselves out there on reality television, then they are exposing themselves to other people’s ridicule, comments, anything at all. Maybe the term “guido” or “guidette” is insensitive, but the actual people taking part in the show used them, as well as defined themselves, their lives, their personality—BY the term. But, really, I have been to themed parties thrown by black people, white people, Spanish people…it really doesn’t matter: I have never once thought that there was something off about the parties (or who was pre-dominantly throwing them). I really can’t even imagine what a theme party geared toward blacks would even be like. Usually theme parties come from television, whether it is reality, movies, shows, etc. that is mostly the main theme for all of them (at least every one I’ve been to). Maybe if you gave an example I could better understand what you mean, but for the most part—I don’t really see any correlation with race and theme partie Thu, 4 Mar 2010 19:39:11 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment59779550 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/are-whites-the-only-people-willing-to-humiliate-themselves__trashed/#IDComment59778505 I actually noticed the same exact thing while watching the season finale of The Bachelor. There are pretty much no people of color, and very little diversity in ethnicity. However, with more controversial reality TV shows—like Flavor of Love, or For the Love of Ray J--- there is a diverse group of people. Is that because the people looking for love are black? Or is it just because more people of color, ethnicity, background etc. would go for someone like Flavor Flave and Ray J. It is quite confusing when you look at the demographics of these shows. Do they choose white people because more people watch The Bachelor, or do they choose white people—thus causing more white people to watch The Bachelor OR do these bachelors and bachelorettes have a preference at the beginning before the cameras even start rolling. These reality TV shows are so hard to peg---usually they are predominantly white or predominantly colored, there is really no in between. Even non-reality shows are pre-dominantly white. Every time I turn on ABC Family, Disney, E, or even news channels-- there is a show with white people cast as the main characters: Secret Life of the American Teenager, Greek, Wizards of Waverly Place, Keeping up with the Kardashians, news anchors from MSNBC, Fox, etc. I think the only reality show I’ve seen that can compare with Kardashians is “Reverend Run’s House,” a reality show about a black family of a reverend. Honestly, I really have no clue as to why television stations do this (make it all white). Maybe they think not a lot of people will watch it, or it will become “trashy” (like much of Flavor of Love is), or perhaps they think that people of diverse backgrounds don’t watch those kinds of shows. It is confusing, no doubt, but I don’t think there is anything that can change it other than the evolution of television. The Bachelor and The Bachelorette will continue having predominantly white contestants (if you can call them that) for as long as people keep watching---I’m sure when people lose interest, they will try something else to spruce it up, but for the most part, it’s going to continue to be dominated (just like all reality television is) by whites, maybe throwing in a colored person here or there. Sometimes, I’ve noticed, the people who recruit for these shows try to get off with adding a Latina to the mix or someone who is completely Americanized, but has an exotic look or background. I guess that’s how it’s going to be---but I’d be shocked if within the next year or two a colored bachelor or bachelorette comes into the mix. I would even be shocked if there were more than four people on the show with a different, diverse background other than blonde, skinny, and fake tanned. I guess the movie producers don’t want to take the risk of trying something new—just like the old saying, “if it’s not broke, why fix it?” Thu, 4 Mar 2010 19:30:30 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/are-whites-the-only-people-willing-to-humiliate-themselves__trashed/#IDComment59778505