gdp's Comments

Wonkette : The Snake Oil Bulletin: Butt-Chugging Gluten With The Food Babe

Sun, 15 Feb 2015 15:44:52 +0000

Easy for you to say that, as one who wasn't tormented by your schoolmates with the taunt "Hey, Glutenface!"

Wonkette : The Snake Oil Bulletin: Butt-Chugging Gluten With The Food Babe

Sun, 15 Feb 2015 15:41:06 +0000

If I could do one thing differently, I never would have bought all those shares in Consolidated Gluten.

Wonkette : What 'Lesser Cut Of Meat' Are Women? Like A Flank Steak Maybe?

Fri, 13 Feb 2015 20:23:47 +0000

It appears that FITS News takes her side because she's less of a RINO than Corbin, so yeah, in her case they can safely dream of a day when a Republican is judged not by the configuration of their nasty bits but the content of their wingnuttery.

Wonkette : Asshat Wankers Celebrate Lincoln's Birthday By Thanking John Wilkes Booth

Fri, 13 Feb 2015 19:11:51 +0000

It's about heritage, not hate. Well, some hate. Well, actually, a lot. Look, it's about hate, alright?

Wonkette : GOP Rep Just Sure Obama Really Loves Those Mooslims He’s About To Bomb

Fri, 13 Feb 2015 18:56:35 +0000

There comes a point where this shit isn't funny any more. And as someone who lives for lulz, I take personal offense.

Wonkette : Gee Does It Seem Like Elizabeth Warren Knows More About Banks Than This Bank Lobbyist Does?

Fri, 13 Feb 2015 16:22:50 +0000

That gal can really dish out the STFU.

Wonkette : New Republican Congress Accomplishes Nothing, Goes On Vacation

Fri, 13 Feb 2015 15:27:13 +0000

They're friggin' in the riggin' 'cause there's fuck-all else to do.

Wonkette : Rick Santorum Hates Americans For Our Erotic Freedoms

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 23:02:13 +0000

Freedom of speech isn't really worth much if you're too fucking dumb to put a coherent sentence together.

Wonkette : Rush Limbaugh: Scott Walker Should Use Rape Jokes To Explain Quitting College

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 22:52:40 +0000

"Is it true, Governor, that you left college to avoid prosecution for rape?" "I'm going to punt on that one."

Wonkette : Ruth Bader Ginsburg: It's OK, America, Gay Marriage Won't Hurt A Bit

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 16:56:28 +0000

I wish someone would hurry up and invent an internal-combustion engine that runs on wingnut tears, 'cause we're about to hit the motherlode.

Wonkette : Morning Maddow: Jeb Bush's Website Violates Everybody's Privacy, Oops (Video)

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:43:47 +0000

He's been poaching experts from this team to keep his website up to date.

Wonkette : Elizabeth Warren Asks Questions About Vaccines, Gets Shocking Answers

Wed, 11 Feb 2015 18:35:55 +0000

Like Bitcoin, anti-vaxx information is backed by the full faith and credit of the Internet.

Wonkette : Arizona Senate Committee Votes To Make Federal Government Optional

Wed, 11 Feb 2015 18:24:36 +0000

I'm pretty sure even Scalia and Thomas would slap this one down, WHICH JUST GOES TO PROVE THEIR POINT.

Wonkette : Alabama Continues To Reel From Tyrannical Federal Gay Marriage Over-Reach-Around

Wed, 11 Feb 2015 17:21:35 +0000

I'd like to see a bunch of gay Alabamans form a group called Homosexual Friends of Roy Moore and give a press conference that would be a spectacle of extravagant fruitiness to beggar elviouslyqueer's imagination.

Wonkette : Tennessee Continues Long Tradition Of Hurting Poors, Totally Sucking

Wed, 11 Feb 2015 14:36:05 +0000

If Tennessee had been testing poor folks for drug abuse back in the 50's, there never would have been rockabilly music.

Wonkette : Jon Stewart Made An Announcement Last Night, Don't Wanna Talk About It

Wed, 11 Feb 2015 14:10:15 +0000

I like calling that other guy Craig Shouldhavebeenkilledbeforehewasborn.

Wonkette : Creationists: Darwin Was Wrong And Unicorns Are Real

Tue, 10 Feb 2015 21:15:07 +0000

The world is groaning all right.

Wonkette : Aaron Schock Spending Tax Moneys On Hot Male Personal Photographer. Totally Normal.

Tue, 10 Feb 2015 20:09:59 +0000

He's probably a "former" wedding photographer because it was against his religious convictions to take photos at all these gay weddings they're having nowadays.

Wonkette : Bobby Jindal Can't See Race, Not Even In The Mirror

Tue, 10 Feb 2015 17:47:51 +0000

What we haven't seen yet is the secret portrait he keeps in his attic, the one that shows a man eternally possessing normal intelligence while Bobby's own face reflects the ongoing ravages of a life devoted to derpidity.

Wonkette : Your Smart TV Is Probably Spying On You, What Could Go Wrong?

Tue, 10 Feb 2015 16:54:18 +0000

I've been trying to tell you people for years that the government is spying on you through your TV!