en-us https://www.intensedebate.com/users/759779 Comments by sstiles623 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment69970598 Part 3 I do believe people can change and the prisons should recognize it, the problem is how can you really be sure, and who is going to decide what is the right level of change a person needs to show. That is really the issue, because we live in a gray world of anomalies. That is just too subjective though. There would be no true way for a person to judge whether someone has changed, and especially in the legal business if there is not a clear line or definition someone can apply to see if inmates have changed, there is nothing that can be done. While people do change and no one who changes should be punished for life, we have to treat all alike, because then it could become a favorites game which would be way less fair. Fri, 23 Apr 2010 19:21:15 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment69970598 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment69970560 Part 2 People are not just good and evil, we are equipped to change and evolve as we age and experience more, so it is really unrealistic to say once a bad person always a bad person. That’s why it makes sense for this lifer to write about basic human instincts that are within us no matter what your past actions may be. The inmate who was writing this excerpt really did put a more compassionate face to prisoners in jail. It is really amazing to see how far a person can change, how they can evolve as time goes on. What I believe he was trying to get through was that as a prisoner you are not automatically uncompassionate, do not care for others, and are all around mean. The basic human instincts kick in in times of hardships and hurdles. That is funny the prisoner was talking about how not all people in jail are bad. My friend always says you cannot really tell how a person is until a crisis comes along and they are at their worst, that is when you can tell what kind of person they really are, because all their actions and words are true. Fri, 23 Apr 2010 19:20:53 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment69970560 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment69970499 Part 1 This story really intrigued me as I was scrolling down though the recent blog posts, because it was based off of a story Sam told in class that really intrigued me and got me to think a little bit more about. Sam was talking about how he and his wife, Laurie, go and visit lifers at the local prison. Humans have always intrigued me, how we are so different from each other, but in the end still so much a like. When people think of prisons they automatically think of it as a place where all the evil and bad people go. The truth of the matter is the world is not just plain and simple like most would like to think. It is not black and white, good and evil, but this gray area that I keep on bringing up in most of my blogs. It is actually possible for innocent people to be in prison, it is possible that a really good person got caught up with the wrong crowd, or that a scared person was just doing what it took to preserve their own life or that of a family member. Fri, 23 Apr 2010 19:20:29 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment69970499 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-about-the-men__trashed/#IDComment68013614 It is human nature to want to fit in, to be the part of the in crowd, to wear what the famous people wear, and to act like everyone else. Who sets the norm though for the whole society to follow as the new “it” thing? I really believe men just as much as women are susceptible to the influence of society, because in the end all anyone really wants to do is fit in, and be a part of the majority. This starts at a very young age, the need to be accepted, little kids will compete for their parents attention with their siblings, because they want to be the most liked. I think that’s where it all stems from the competitive nature of human beings. As we age though the need for acceptance really takes a turn for the need to be accepted in society, and become like everyone else, normal. When someone feels accepted and wanted they feel good, so one will do whatever it takes to achieve it and keep that feeling around. When people see other people happy like this they associate it with that persons looks, skills, and other attributes, so they want to be like them so they too can have that feel good feeling. Who really decides what is “in” though and the way men and women should act. Is it the opposite sex who sets these guidelines per say out for the opposite gender? I do think it is partly that, women want to be attractive to males because it is just human nature so they will do whatever the men think is attractive to be more appealing, and vice versa with men. Nowadays we are more than ever bombarded with media. We have television shows of celebrity gossip of who’s who in Hollywood, we have magazines plastered with perfect models all over them, and we have the internet where you are just one click away from anything. Even though it always appears women feel the pressure of society on the way they should walk, talk, and act, I believe men are just as susceptible, just in their own way. Society says women need to be pretty, skinny, and big chest-ed. You can tell when women are feeling the pressure of society’s norm, because these are outwardly appearances that can be judged with a quick glance. With men everyone expects them to be tough. They are not really supposed to show any emotion like crying. They are supposed to like sports, and they are generally supposed to be strong emotionally and physically. It is harder to tell whether men are feeling the pressure of fitting the norm because it is more important with how they act, and first glance really cannot tell you that. In the end I feel like everyone feels the pressure to fit society’s norm. In the end its just human nature, it’s what we do, want to feel wanted, needed, and loved. Wed, 14 Apr 2010 16:51:26 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-about-the-men__trashed/#IDComment68013614 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/this-is-totally-off-the-hook__trashed/#IDComment66422306 As I was looking through the video posts to see which one I wanted to end up replying to I came across the Japanese video game post. Unlike the other posts this was something new and fresh, something not really touched upon in class, so I decided to choose this one as a change of topics per say. When I started reading and watching the video though I was surprised to see what it actually was about, virtual video rape. What the video was basically saying was that there are video game out in the Japanese market that depicts rape and other stalker-ish qualities towards women and girls. I was actually really shocked that they would allow something like this out in the market for people to buy and use. I mean I do not really know anything about the Japanese culture or how their government is run, but I assumed this problem to be a basic common human knowledge. You cannot hold rape lightly and make fun or even base games off it. I really wonder who actually comes up with these games though, because this is not something some everyday normal human being would think up. These people need to be evaluated by a therapist clearly something is off there. The video goes on to explain the grotesque nature of the games. For example you can corner girls and repeatedly rape them, stalk them on busses, and even grope them. That is not all though some of the scenes are too graphic not even CNN can show and report on them. I do not see how any game like this really is a good thing to have out on the market. This is normalizing an action such as rape that should not be taken so lightly or half heartily. What is even worse is that since we are in the new age of technology where anything can be transported and sent to the masses in a matter of seconds via the world wide web, it is coming to America. Multiple women rights groups are infuriated with these games as they should be, but what makes them any different than the other shooting and violence games out there. Both types of games play up and normalize illegal activities such as rape and murder, while murder games are allowed to stay on the market in the Unites States. I found it surprising that when the Japanese government was confronted about their video games that they uttered no response back to them. I know we cannot do anything about how the Japanese government handles their country but we can try and out regulations on it here in the United States. I do not know where it will end to be quite honest. If rape becomes a subject you can poke fun at and make a game about, there soon will be no stopping at what else you can make a game of, no matter how good or bad that may be. Wed, 7 Apr 2010 16:59:06 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/this-is-totally-off-the-hook__trashed/#IDComment66422306 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/nothing-about-the-census-is-easy__trashed/#IDComment64963084 Part 3 This does not only happen for black though. The same problem arises with Hispanics/ Latinos. They have a wide variety of terms used to describe their ethnicities. They vary from Latino, Mexican, Puerto Rican, Chicano, Hispanic, and even Spanish. For many individuals they fall in to multiple categories so they do not know which one they should check, causing yet another dilemma. This makes the process of this whole census thing kind of out of date per say. A most of us know as the years go by there will be less and less distinct races and more mixes. So what will the government do then to take account of what kind of citizens they have. I never realized how confusing this process could be of checking a race off on the census sheets. Nothing is ever black and white in the real world. There is always this gray area. The government tries its best to account for everything but it is just not possible, so they are forced to over generalize. Wed, 31 Mar 2010 05:28:30 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/nothing-about-the-census-is-easy__trashed/#IDComment64963084 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/nothing-about-the-census-is-easy__trashed/#IDComment64963034 Part 2 At first when I saw this topic I was confused at how such a simple task as marking what race you are on a piece of paper could be so hard. I then watched the short CNN video clip and it became more clear. The video showed how confusing this apparently simple task can really be. Take the African American race for example, they have black naturally as an option, African American as another option so it can be more respectful if some think black is derogatory. Now for the first time in awhile they added back again the term negro. Responses varied for example on the video a group of black people when told that negro was put on the census sheet, they seemed confused and appalled. One said it reminded them of old times and the slaves. It almost seemed like they took it as a derogatory term. I think the reason why they put it back on this time was because for older individuals they would be confused as what to put because that is all they knew of since they were born. Wed, 31 Mar 2010 05:28:04 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/nothing-about-the-census-is-easy__trashed/#IDComment64963034 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/nothing-about-the-census-is-easy__trashed/#IDComment64962992 Part 1 More and more lately we have been hearing about the upcoming census that us Americans are being urged to fill out to help the government know who and what kind of people they have here living in the United States. But of course nothing is ever as easy as it may first appear. The biggest issue I have heard so far is the races and ethnicities they put on the census for people to check off. Sam brought it up in class for a bit, but I assume as time goes on and it gets closer to the census date he will bring the issue of race up in class since it is relevant to what we study in Soc 119. Wed, 31 Mar 2010 05:27:38 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/nothing-about-the-census-is-easy__trashed/#IDComment64962992 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64241484 Part 3 Like other things in the world today, people know of things that you just should not talk about. For example, pooping, vomiting, other “dirty” bodily functions, and yes even periods. I do not understand why though that such a natural and vital process such as the period has such an effect on a classroom and society. I do feel that if men had a period too then it wouldn’t be as such of a hard subject to talk about. I mean girls all the time talk about their periods to other girls because it is natural and they are comfortable hearing it. The second you talk about it to a male though they do not want to have anything to do with it. It is not their problem so they really just do not want to hear about it. I just really thought it was funny when this girl in class got on the mike and was mad saying does your wife know you talk about her period in class like that? Of course she has to know, what I do not understand is why that girls was getting so broken up about the matter. When it comes down to it it’s a natural process that unfortunately is necessary. Fri, 26 Mar 2010 19:56:15 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64241484 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64241428 Part 2 I have to admit though I was surprised that at the first utterance of the word, as he calls it “bleeding” , groups of students, that from what I can tell were mainly males, left the classroom all together. Yea it is one of those topics in life that we just do not talk about for one reason or another, but for some reason the men and even some females could not take what he was talking about. I mean really it is a natural process that every female has to go through, and like all the other posts that I was reading said, none of us would even be here if it was not for women’s periods. Fri, 26 Mar 2010 19:55:53 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64241428 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64241368 Part 1 I have to admit I still do not know how Sam got on the topic of his wife’s period. One second we were going through the stages of how white people feel about race issues or something to that effect, and the next thing you know Laurie’s period is the new topic. I was actually reading some other posts and one kid made a valid point about how and even why this topic could possibly come up and even be related to the whole race stages. The student said Sam was talking about how you just will never know how it is to be another race you can try but you will never know. That kind of relates to the whole period subject of how men just do not know how it is to actually have a period. To me this does actually make sense, maybe he was just trying to relate it to all of us with an issue that was not race related at all but gender related. Fri, 26 Mar 2010 19:55:24 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64241368 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-happens-to-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment63333099 Part 3 As I was reading through some of these posts to the question I do agree with the person who said Sam just had 2 races to simplify the process. There is no possible way he could have a question for each race out there, there are simply too many to account for. We would be wasting the class, so in order to just make things simple it is easier just to divide the questions by people who have color and people who do not. Still I understand that it can be confusing for some because the color of their skin may not really be how they define who they are going to associate with, or as Sam says what team they are going to play for. I feel then that is the point when you just go with what you associate with. I mean take my friend for example even though he looks like any other white person he still associates with his Mexican heritage so he would vote with the black or brown people. When it comes down to it you just have to do what is right for you what feels right. In the end it is just a class and they are just questions if you cannot decide who to vote with just don’t vote at all, in the grand scheme of life this does not really matter. Sun, 21 Mar 2010 15:05:32 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-happens-to-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment63333099 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-happens-to-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment63333068 Part 2 It was interesting to see Vinny post a question about his friend who was confused with whom he should vote with. Thinking more about this question made me realize I am sure there are many more students in the class who feel this way. Then it hit me my friend David had the same question of who he should answer the questions with. He is Mexican, both his parents are Mexican, but he lived most of his life in Texas. You would think okay what is the problem, he is Mexican so he associates with the colored people questions. The funny thing is he looks like any other white person though, you would not be able to tell the difference from him to another white student until he opened his mouth. This is kind of confusing I can see now, do you vote by where you are born, what nationality you are, or what you look like, aka the color of your skin. Sun, 21 Mar 2010 15:05:09 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-happens-to-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment63333068 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-happens-to-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment63333040 Part 1 I knew this was going to cause confusion, questions, and even anger when Sam had questions up on the big screen that were divided up by different races answering certain questions. He had the questions split up into two very broad categories whites, and black or brown people. Since this world is not just black and white but in the middle filled with gray area. We have become a very diverse nation today, much more culturally mixed than ever before. So naturally there would be much more races intermixing and making the lines of race more blurry as the years go on. So with such a vast overgeneralization of races in the class questions where do the mixed races fit in, with whom do they associate with. Sun, 21 Mar 2010 15:04:47 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-happens-to-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment63333040 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment61287377 Part 3 I have been to many themed parties but never have I ever been to one that pokes fun at any race. If anything we made fun of ourselves more than anything. I have heard of many themes like catholic school theme party and white trash party, but never anything that in the slightest made fun of someone of different color. Another thing I hated about the way this girl stated her question was that only whites have themed parties. Really, are you crazy? I know for a fact that all kinds of people have themed parties not to poke fun at races but to spice up a party and make it more interesting. Of course sometimes you will get costumes that may go too far like someone dressing up as Obama for Halloween and going as far as painting themselves. When you really step back though and think about it, it is not to be racist and hate on a person, but rather poke fun and make light of the person. Everyone gets made fun of it is part of life, just don’t take everything too personally. Wed, 10 Mar 2010 21:18:41 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment61287377 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment61287270 Part 2 This girl was in the TA’s class and this is where the topic was generated from. The teacher brought in an article about a Compton Cookout. What it basically was, was a bunch of white people came dressed as residents of Compton. As most know many residents of Compton are black. On the invitation it basically said to come dressed up in your ghetto wear like Rocawear and Fubu. Some decided to take it to far though as some of my classmates said by painting themselves black. This stirred up much controversy and that’s what made the girl in the blog post give a question like that. Knowing now more behind the story I can understand how the girl felt the way she did, but is she crazy to think that everyone is like that, that was a humongous generalization. Wed, 10 Mar 2010 21:18:15 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment61287270 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment61287058 Part 1 When I first heard this blog post I was so surprised at how that comment right there over generalized not only the white race but the black race as well. The whole point of this class was to become more educated so we would not make such comments that were totally not backed up by any facts and not to just base a whole race on stereotypes. I was seriously like what the heck is she talking about? I immediately went into defense mode as about a hundred and one reasons popped into my head of how this chick was wrong with various examples to back me up. What made me happy was that it got the same reaction from my discussion group classmates as it did from me. It made me feel like I was not just over reacting. We all could not understand what would cause this girl to make such remarks, until one of the TA’s explained the back story to it. Wed, 10 Mar 2010 21:17:34 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment61287058 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/when-do-we-do-or-say-something__trashed/#IDComment58895651 When the student in class spoke up and gave a possible reason or excuse to why the statistics are the way they are brought up some valid points but like I have said in previous blogs there are always two sides to every story. To recap the past lecture there was a startling social experiment where there was visible racism and they took note of how various patrons of the store reacted to it. Six agreed with the racism and were totally for it while thirteen stood up against racism, and a startling amount of twenty two people just turned their back to it. You see this tend is all too common though. This is not the first time I have heard of these types of social experiments. One time I was watching a twenty/twenty special when a similar situation was set up as the one in class. They had people getting robbed in a park and they watched to see what other people in the park would do. The interesting thing they did here was that they changed the races of not only the robbers but the person getting robbed too. The one common tie to the social experiment we saw in class was that no matter how many people went to go help the person, call the police, or wait till more people came to help out the person, the majority of people just left, turned their shoulder and just went on their daily business. I find that very intriguing that the number of people who just forget about what they just saw was so high in comparison to the people who helped. I find it funny we all as humans are programmed to know right and wrong. We are even taught to share, respect others, and treat people like you want to be treated in kindergarten. As we grow though, we somehow forget the most basic, but vital lessons we learned way back when we were little. I brought this story up to my roommate because she is taking psychology so I figured she could give me a reason as to why people forget the basic lessons learned in kindergarten. She told me that it has been proven that if people are in big groups they are less likely to go and help someone in danger because they figure someone else will do it so I do not have to. You are more likely to help if you are by yourself because you feel like you have an obligation to the person in distress because you are the only one present. I can kind of see why the student in class said he probably would not say anything because his parents basically told him to mind his own business. His is the majority of people out there. The thing is though not saying anything at all says a whole lot more than you can ever imagine. By turning your shoulder its as if you agree with the injustice. Sat, 27 Feb 2010 00:33:01 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/when-do-we-do-or-say-something__trashed/#IDComment58895651 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/lgbt-class-question-six__trashed/#IDComment57648682 When I first heard we were going to have a class on LGBT issues I was intrigued. It is not every day I get to sit in on a class and have a discussion on controversial life issues such as gay marriage, adoptions, and other things of that sort. I was really trying to take this as a learning opportunity and get as much from it as possible. It raised many questions in my discussion group about how gays are perceived and the main question of the day was this one, why are lesbians more accepted in society versus gay men? I think one of the biggest reasons for lesbians to be more accepted is the pure fact that they are female. In society we have the double standard with men and women. It is ok for a guy to get a lot of girls, but if a girl gets around then she is a slut, even though she was acting the same was as the male in regards to relationships. It seems to be ok for a female to be a lesbian but a male is just looked at differently. It may be because females are naturally more emotional and more loving publicly. Males have this image per say that society generally says they have to live up to. They need to be strong and tough and show no emotion or that would be a big sign of weakness. When you see two lesbians it may just seem more natural, but for the males it just does not seem to make sense with societies perceptions on gender roles. Another big part I think of why lesbians are more accepted is because I think it is generally harder to tell if they are actually lesbians. Girls naturally are more touchy feely. They link arms with other women as they walk down streets and they hug much more often to say hello, goodbye, or I am here for you. Now if you see males linking arms down the street it just looks more out of place and people will notice it more. The truth of the matter may be that we do not recognize lesbians as lesbians but just as close friends. So therefore it almost seems like they are being accepted, when actually the acceptance rate of lesbians and gays may be pretty much the same. Finally I think another reason why lesbians could be more accepted is because guys are known to love some girl on girl action. The porn industry definitely plays upon the male fantasy of females hooking up with each other. You never really see females egging on males to hook up with each other like males do. Because males seem ok with females hooking up society may feel more comfortable with lesbians because it is almost more common. One way or another both groups still have a long way to go in getting accepted no matter if you are a lesbian or gay. I am glad we ended up having a class on this because it was a nice change from the same old topic lectures over and over, and it sparked many questions from students as well. Fri, 19 Feb 2010 17:15:25 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/lgbt-class-question-six__trashed/#IDComment57648682 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/swinging-past-the-other-end-of-the-ideological-spectrum-on-the-way-to-the-intellectual-gray__trashed/#IDComment56549515 I know this may not be the majority of my fellow classmates general consensus about Sam's lecture he gave Tuesday but I thought he ended up talking about nothing really controversial and instead about general facts of life that I consider common sense. The whole point of the lecture I presume, and correct me if I am wrong, was how it is not good or as he said intellectually sound to be an extremist. The intellectual person realizes that you have to be in the middle of both extremes. I thought that was common knowledge though that being an extremist in any situation was a bad thing. We live in the real world where things are never black and white; there is this whole gray area. There are always two sides to every story. We do not live in a perfect world we live in a world filled of anomalies filled with “gray” issues per-say. Take for example people getting killed everyday, which is a horrible thing that unfortunately happens all too often. We as a society understand that it is wrong to kill yet a way of handling a murderer is sentencing him or her to the death penalty. It is a gray issue, it is wrong to kill, but some murders are justifiable in the eyes of the law. It is issues like these that made me assume that it was common knowledge that being an extremist of any sort was not a good thing. Since we do not live in a perfect world I did not even know how someone or something could be totally one way and that way only. When I googled the definition of perfect one site said it is to be complete and without defect. This is never possible to be without defect because we live in the world that we do. Therefore by Sam going around Tuesday trying to say to be intellectual and not ignorant you have to realize that you have to be in the middle was just coming off as nothing new or special, just basic knowledge engrained in every human being. I do realize though that I am a very commonsensical I guess you could say if that is even a word. I notice what I assumed previously to be blatantly obvious may not be so true for others. It has now just occurred to me as I am finishing up my blog that it obviously was not as much of a common sense issue as I thought. Why else would Sam have brought it up then? He has been teaching for awhile so I am sure he knows the general consensus on certain issues better than I do and maybe he has noticed throughout time that people just don’t understand the whole gray issue. I guess I am just one of the few then that look at the world differently than others there is no totally right and wrong just a big mess in the middle called the gray area. Fri, 12 Feb 2010 21:42:16 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/swinging-past-the-other-end-of-the-ideological-spectrum-on-the-way-to-the-intellectual-gray__trashed/#IDComment56549515