gdp's Comments

Wonkette : Illinois Gov. Rauner Halts 'Non-Essential' Spending Except For His Wife

Thu, 29 Jan 2015 00:12:11 +0000

rauner just named his new chief financial officer this week. she seems nice.

Wonkette : 2015 GOP State Of The Union Response Starring Joni Ernst And A Plastic Bag Shoe Liveblog

Wed, 21 Jan 2015 04:15:52 +0000

randy paul: entertaining in his awfulness. joni ernst: kind of almost entertaining, but mostly inept and boorrrrrrrring.

Wonkette : Larry Klayman Pretty Sure Hillary Will Make You Wish You Had Richard Nixon To Kick Around

Tue, 20 May 2014 02:50:35 +0000

"But since it has been like 10 minutes since Larry had another theory" larry must be getting his fiber if his "theories" are that frequent.

Wonkette : Mike Huckabee Practices New GOP Outreach To Women: They're Whores Who Can't Stop Boning

Thu, 23 Jan 2014 23:46:08 +0000

when he was the morbidly obese governor of arkansas(with a government health insurance plan), i can only assume that he was prescribed various medications to control his type 2 beetus. i also assume that he was on lipitor or some other similar medication meant to control cholesterol levels and others for hypertension. it's such a shame that the taxpaying citizens of arkansas were forced to subsidize his unhealthy sugar slut lifestyle.

Wonkette : Peggy Noonan Outraged Barack Obama Invited That Fake Sign Language Guy To Mandela's Memorial

Wed, 18 Dec 2013 23:50:58 +0000

All eyes turn to him. “Wait—wait. No—uh—I don’t think that’s the code we use to launch against incoming from North Korea, I think that one takes out Paris!” sounds like peggy's writing a screenplay for an adaptation of a tom clancy novel where jack ryan is played by rowan atkinson.

Wonkette : Let's All Watch Some Douche Yell At Kathleen Sebelius

Wed, 11 Dec 2013 23:54:55 +0000

gee it would have been nice if congressman shimkus would have been this adamant about investigating mark foley back in 2005.

Wonkette : House GOP No Longer The Craziest People In The House

Thu, 17 Oct 2013 04:18:13 +0000

madam speaker, i'mma let you finish, but ted cruz...

Wonkette : Our Long National Nightmare Put Off A Few Months As Debt Ceiling Raised, Government Funded

Thu, 17 Oct 2013 04:13:19 +0000

derrrrrp nancy please get enough democrat votes to pass this thing please derrrrrp another glenlivet please derrrp... they're so mean to me, all of them. and cantor's texting cruz all day... i'm so alone out here. john, i've got the votes, please, just stand up. and for fuck's sake, you've soiled yourself again. have some dignity. ugh.

Wonkette : Our Long National Nightmare Put Off A Few Months As Debt Ceiling Raised, Government Funded

Thu, 17 Oct 2013 04:03:39 +0000

remember that time i failed to repeal obamacare and almost tanked the global economy? cruz 2016!

Wonkette : Fox News Says There's No Government Shutdown; Federal Government & WIC Recipients Just Dieting

Wed, 2 Oct 2013 22:51:38 +0000

do you wish your government had that lean, austere look? are you struggling burn off those last few pounds of infrastructure, food safety inspections, research on disease, and national park services? well, just wait until you try the tea party's all new government slimdown! those problem areas caused by unemployment insurance and the snap program will disappear overnight once the government slimdown program transforms your government into a skinny heroin chic supermodel! the corporate overlords and wall street fat cats won't be able to believe their eyes when they see the irresistible unregulated new you.

Wonkette : Scott Walker Bravely Signs Anti-Abortion Law In Private On Friday Afternoon Of Long Holiday Weekend

Sun, 7 Jul 2013 05:42:02 +0000

first off: if republicans(and democrats) had applied a similar level of scrutiny to home mortgage standards and financial regulation 8 years ago... something something. and to your point... ALEC is fucking scary and actually pretty impressive. ignoring the ideological and partisan side, ALEC's ability to author legislation at the state level is just terrifying. we really have no equivalent at our disposal.

Wonkette : Sarah Palin Stars In Quitting Part Two: The Quittening

Mon, 1 Jul 2013 22:24:58 +0000

this idiot couldn't organize a fucking tupperware party.

Wonkette : Super Smart Kansas GOP Senator Does Not Know The Difference Between Yes And No

Thu, 27 Jun 2013 22:47:00 +0000

immediately following the vote, a visibly frustrated senator moran was seen stomping through the senate chamber. observers in the vicinity report that he said: "GODDAMMIT I AM JUST NO GOOD AT MULTIPLE CHOICE QUESTIONS STUPID JERRY STUPID STUPID STUPID JERRY FUCK ME GODDAMMIT SHIT."

Wonkette : More Nice Time: Immigrant-Hating Iowa Rep. Steve King Terrified, Shamed By Polite Messican Children,

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 22:22:42 +0000

"get off my lawn! after you mow it!"

Wonkette : Heritage Foundation Will Sacrifice Its Own Son, Obamacare, To Appease Angry God

Thu, 30 May 2013 03:46:10 +0000

just more proof that the heritage foundation has fallen under the influence of Big Sociopathy.

Wonkette : RNC Chair Reince Priebus Will Buy President Pizza, To Save Money, For Freedom

Tue, 9 Apr 2013 22:29:52 +0000

other comments have mentioned this, but the analogy actually makes the case FOR government investment to spur economic growth. if you order a larger pizza(invest in infrastructure, education, energy initiatives, etc.), you spend more, but can also feed more people(spur economic growth which results in more jobs for more people). reince priebus is so fucking stupid, he only makes sense on accident.

Wonkette : Matthew Boyle’s Latest Crusade For Breitbart’s Corpse: Let’s Put Those Awful Obama Daughters I

Tue, 26 Mar 2013 23:00:08 +0000

boyle's "argument" is possibly the stupidest fucking thing i've heard today. it's roughly the same as "why should my kids be given bicycle helmets if i can't afford to have marble counter tops installed in my kitchen??" or maybe it's more akin to "why should cats be able to lick their own genitals if major league baseball refuses to allow the designated hitter in the national league??"

Wonkette : New Michigan Democratic Party Chairman Lon Johnson Is NOT The Lee Strasberg Of Porn Lon Johnson

Mon, 25 Feb 2013 15:52:36 +0000

his staff is hard at work, focused on stimulus and spurring growth in targeted sectors. also, boners.

Wonkette : Groggy Old Mitch McConnell Bothering Pentagon About Nonsense Again

Thu, 21 Feb 2013 14:50:47 +0000

"DEAR SENATOR MCCONNELL WHY DOES THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION KEEP INCREASING OUR DEFICIT BY BORROWING TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS FROM CHINESE INSTEAD OF INVESTING OUR MONEY WITH THE NIGERIAN PRINCE THAT EMAILED ME TODAY???"

Wonkette : Groggy Old Mitch McConnell Bothering Pentagon About Nonsense Again

Thu, 21 Feb 2013 14:43:23 +0000

what a fucking goober. reid should deploy a staffer to distract mcconnell for hours with the old "i've got your nose!" maneuver. that would decrease the number of republican filibusters.