43 comments posted · 12 followers · following 0

8 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 2 replies · +8 points

How about the awful cowlick on the back of my head that looks for all the world like a bald spot with my second day hair?? Pleeaase make me not the only one with that problem. I used to bug my hairdresser about it every time I saw her (like, "Are you suuuuure I'm not going bald??") She's finally got me convinced that I'm not losing any hair, but that it's just an unfortunate cowlick. Dry shampoo helps on some days, but other days there is is just nothing I can do short of wash it again or put a bun right on top of the weird spot. Or just go out in the world giving no fucks.

8 years ago @ The Toast - Happy Beverly Crusher ... · 1 reply · +7 points

No, it didn't sound rude at all! I think you have a good point that some people put a lot of pressure on themselves to have their day jobs be meaningful in some way, while other people (that I envy sometimes) are perfectly capable of working a day job for years without taking it too seriously while pursuing meaningful, sustaining activities and relationships outside of work.

My mom always urged me to follow my passions or whatever, because when she was starting out she just needed to eat and couldn't worry about what her passion was. So I feel like a jerk over here just being like, thanks for working your ass off and raising me so well mom but I don't have any career passions. :( I know this must be a common experience.

Anywaayyyyy yeah it definitely might be time to change things up!

8 years ago @ The Toast - Happy Beverly Crusher ... · 0 replies · +4 points

This is an excellent idea. I like to do this too! I've also been the shopgirl in that equation, and that also feels really good sometimes :)

8 years ago @ The Toast - Happy Beverly Crusher ... · 3 replies · +8 points

TOUCHE. You've got me there! I don't know, I would like to care about my job! I cared much more about my job when I was running a little store in a small town, though I was always broke, than now when I am a decently-paid professional on a computer all day.

8 years ago @ The Toast - Happy Beverly Crusher ... · 12 replies · +27 points

Following suit and using this as an Open Thread. Feeling a lot of existential angst today! Does anyone else feel The Terror on a kind of regular basis? What do you do to make peace with it, or make it go away? I have a happy life and a job with a nice, mission-driven nonprofit, but sometimes I find myself sitting in front of a database just unable to care about what I'm doing at all. Like I love the mission of my organization, but it boils down to me doing these nitty gritty things that are so uninspiring and seem so unimportant. I went to a career-advancement seminar yesterday and listened to these successful young people talk about their ultra-successful nonprofit consulting jobs and I just couldn't understand how any of them are so self-motivated! I wanted to ask, How do you make yourself care? Anyone have a way of tricking yourself into caring about your job/other aspects of your life?

I don't feel this way all the time! But I know I can't be the only one. I have plans to see friends this weekend and also will get some exercise outdoors, so I know those will help. Other things?

8 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 0 replies · +2 points

Ooh that first paragraph sounds like my dream of how I want my days to be shaped! Also I really wish my daily routine still involved a slush pile! Seems like a lot of people dread the slush pile but I used to love it--I'd take it home and spend all night digging through sometimes.

8 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 0 replies · +6 points

Maybe he scheduled it?? Ha, now I'm imagining a set-it-and-forget-it option for incredibly lazy, misguided dudes/exes. Who wants in on my new business venture?!

8 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 0 replies · +5 points

Oof, yeah, I've been working with this guy for the past year and for a long time tried to pretend I didn't have this absolute freight train of feelings for him, so I definitely got a taste of the madness that comes from trying to deny your true feelings. And it was so obvious that he was nuts for me too, even before we addressed it! Working together does add another wrinkle, but now that we've started actually hanging out like, ~romantically~ outside of work, we are both MUCH saner and more comfortable.

8 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 1 reply · +6 points

Thank you! I am trying to be self-aware, because you're right--being with this guy is challenging my perception of myself a bit. Like, I always think of myself as so progressive when it comes to relationships, but here we are with the first time I am attracted to someone the slightest bit unexpected for me, and I'm shocked to find out that I care what people think. It is SUPER eye opening. And, like I said above, we're a pretty normative couple for crying out loud. I stand to learn a lot about where my self esteem comes from and why. Lucky me I get to learn these things while spending time with someone that I think is the funniest, most interesting, hottest, best person around.

8 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 0 replies · +9 points

You know what, I almost didn't post this because as awkward as I feel sometimes with someone who is older & shorter & not a certain type...after all, we are a straight couple and we're both white. I know that a lot of what I'm experiencing is probably in my own head, as opposed to the actual glares you and your gf get. So, thank you for being compassionate and recognizing the seed of a shared experience here, even though I am mostly just being a vain idiot.