The conversation we had over Skype with Basum was very intriguing. I admire Sam’s connections around the world. It makes me want to develops such connects with other people around the world. I feel like I only know my family from other places around the world, but the conversation with Basum made me feel the need to go beyond that and develop ties that are worth so much more. Basum spoke very well and at times I could relate to things he was saying. I related most to the statement when he said “don’t believe everything you hear and see in the media.” I related to this the most because since we are not actually over in Iraq, we cannot experience the war first hand. As students we have to pay close attention to things said in the media in order to know what’s really going on. The fact that Basum himself is over in Iraq experiencing everything means so much to me. I would rather hear from a Basum than the media any day. My question for Basum was after saying, don’t believe everything the media says, what is the biggest misconception shown? Basum answered my question by saying just don’t believe everything because it is much exaggerated. I wanted to challenge Basum to really think about something he wanted to get across to Americans and set the record straight. I wanted him to elaborate and give a detailed answer. I was disappointed that he didn’t tell us exactly what the media is exaggerating about. It is important for us as Americans to find out what’s true compared to the exaggerated truth. I think he could have taken the question a lot farther than he did.

If I had a one on one conversation with Basum, I would ask him the same question. I would ask the same question because I really still am curious to find out the answer. I would want him to explain what he meant by exaggeration and what the most exaggerated thing is. I would want to know about other things portrayed in the media as well. The media has a lot to say but if he could be a news reporter for a day about the war what would be most important. What would be the substance of his report and why? Even if he could show some footage in Iraq, what would be the thing he showed the most? I would also ask him if he could tell Americans what he thinks the future of the war would be. I would ask all of these things because these are the thing I am most curious about. These things are what interested me most in the war on Iraq.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS POST!! This post reminds me of every woman’s' dream man. The detailed descriptions throughout this letter remind me of the epitome of the perfect man. I can relate to this post in so many ways. The “man” described in this letter is what every woman is searching for, the perfect husband, the perfect friend, the perfect everything. The funny thing is we have all heard things like this before, yet why is it so hard for men to achieve these things? Why so hard for a man to respect and cherish his woman at all times? I do not have all the answers, but I feel like I am aware of the reasons why. Over the years, I feel like I have tried to teach every man I was in a relationship with the same things mentioned in this letter. I have tried to challenge the men I was with in the past to act like the perfect man. I have tried to tell them how to love a woman and I feel like most times it goes in one ear and out the other. The reasons most men aren't aware of what the true definition of what a man should be is because they take women for granted. They get too comfortable in a relationship and forget how to respect and truly love a woman. Men forget how good of a woman they have and start to take her kindness for weakness. The confuse wants with needs and they confuse authority with priority. Sex is wanted not needed. Not every woman needs sex and I feel like a lot of man forgets this. A woman feelings and emotions should be a priority rather than her using authority to disrespect her.

The reason why I think it took C so long to realize what the true definition of a man should be is because he no longer had a woman around him. He can no longer have sex when he wants and I bet he would give anything just to hold a woman in his arms than not to have one at all. In jail, I would imagine that prisoners think of ways to better themselves and prepare themselves for the real world again. They have time to think about life and all the things that they wish they could have done better in life. All the things they miss and can’t have and above all those things is a woman. It is alarming that it took such a horrible thing like jail to make you realize how women should really be treated. I am glad that at least C knows the proper way to treat a woman. I am actually really curious to find out how is next relationship goes.

There has been a time when I thought about people who travel to American and can not speak English and I thought that must be a horrible feelings. But experiencing something is more than words can express themselves. There was a time when my family and I went on a Mediterranean Cruise. The cruise stop at 13 different places. Each place was similar, but different. It was a different place, but it each one of them I was the foreigner. There was a particular place that we stopped and my mother wanted buy souvenirs. So we made the choice to get off the bus and look around. At our own risk, we could go shopping and then decide how we would get back to the ship. The idea of finding our way back to the ship without assistance was not planned. Shockingly the tour bus left us behind and to our surprised no one around us spoke English. The feelings of not being able to communicate with someone in English felt something close to death. I remembered feeling uncomfortable, scared, vulnerable, and curious all at the same time. I was curious because I had no idea what language was being spoken. I felt like screaming out for help. Everyone we asked replied in what was their language. We displayed mannerisms as we asked how to get back to the ship, but no reply. I remembered to stay calm as my frantic mother started to cry. We walked and walked until we saw a taxi and even then it was hard to explain where we were trying to go. I believe that people do not talk in their language to make other uncomfortable, but it is to make themselves comfortable. They are expressing themselves to the best of their ability.
In order for me to feel uncomfortable around people speaking in their native tongue depends on the environment. It also depends on what language is being spoken. For example, when I go to my hair salon my hair stylist speaks Spanish all the time because they are Dominican. I try to listen and see if I can understand anything because I am interested in minoring in Spanish. I prefer to be around Spanish speaking people for beneficial reasons. It forces me to learn Spanish. Surrounding myself with other who speak Spanish is important to me. Now when I am at the nail salon and I hear two or more people speaking Chinese then I feel very uncomfortable. I feel as though they might be talking about me and I just don't know it. If I was walking through the HUB and people were speaking a different language I wouldn't care. It all depends on the situation.

I remember a specific point in my life when I had a strong feeling about my race. It is sort of difficult to explain. I am not exactly sure if the only word to describe my feeling was “guilt.” As a little girl, moving from a black neighborhood to a white neighborhood made me become aware of my surroundings. At a young age, I realized there was a big difference between white and black. Many of my black friends would say you are not black because I had lighter skin and long hair. I would hear it all the time “you’re not even black.” In the black community, as a little girl, I felt I had to prove my blackness on many occasions and even when I moved away and came back to my old black community to visit, I felt the need to prove my blackness even greater because of the fact that they knew I moved into a white neighborhood. They would say the white people are starting to turn me preppy and that I say like too much. It was ironic though because when I returned to my white neighborhood, I felt the need to act as they did in order to fit in. I would use words I never heard before like “yous” and “knock up.” Being a little girl and experiencing this made me extremely confused as to how I was supposed to act, so I often times switched my identity up depending on which ethnic group I was around. Deep down inside, I just wanted to be myself I didn’t want to prove I was black nor white. I just wanted to find a comfort zone between the middle, but that didn’t seem to exist. It was like you had to be one or the other and I remembered hating that feeling. It made me so uncomfortable that I considered not going to visit my old black community ever again.
It’s sad to say, but I felt guilty about the way black people acted just because it was different. I would act like white people just because I already stood out by being the only black girl in my class. Even when I faked at times, my true identity would continuously fail me. There would be times my Philly accent would come out and my white friends would call me out right away. They would make fun of the way I said “asked.” When I would walk alone, I would always study the differences in the personalities of people regarding a certain ethnic group. I felt like being black was not a good thing. The ways black people operated in Philly were extremely different from the ways white people in the suburbs acted. In Philly, there was so much trash on the ground. In my white community, it was so clean that the tiniest piece of trash would cause me to feel conscious about my race. When I think about it, at that point in my life, I never revealed the way I felt to anyone. When it was time for me to go to middle school, I felt relieved because there were black people who had the same secret I had. They were going through the same thing as me, being black in a white community and eventually my guilt faded and pride took its place.

Initially, when I saw the title I guessed “the r-word” would be the word “racist.” I had no idea it was actually the word “retard” or “retarded.” The video made me feel guilty because I nonchalantly use retarded all the time. Quite often, my friends call me retarded when I do something stupid or weird and in reply I jokingly say no you are. I think humans do not realize the offensive connotation behind retard. I never took the time to notice how insulting the word can be. I don’t even know when I started using the word or why I use it. I was shocked to see it used so much in politics as well. Since so many people use it frequently, many people forget the actual meaning of the word. It had almost become a slang word. After watching this video, I think retard is one word I should cut out of my vocabulary. The video made me conscious of not only saying it but even hearing the way the word is used.

Today, my brother’s friend came over and she said your brother is so retarded. Immediately, I thought of the video and asked her what she thought of the word. She said that someone who is actually retarded should not be offended because it is the same as using the word ghetto or gay. It was almost like she was saying people who are retarded should be come immune to the word, so when they hear it, it will not be as harsh. She explained that the word retarded is a sensitive word, but people are not going to stop using it because of freedom of speech. I feel that not everyone will stop using it, but being aware is key. Just taking the time out of your day to acknowledge the fact that retarded is offensive and avoid using it can be helpful in ending the use of the word. Most people use the word and do not realize how hurtful the word can be to someone who is actually mentally challenged.

On twitter, there are thousands of mentions of the word retard a day. People call anything retarded from things that annoy them to people that act silly. It really is not a proper way to use the word, yet people do it so frequently. Anyone can see how using variations of “retard” is extremely offensive to individuals with intellectual disabilities, so why doesn’t political correctness come into play? There should be a politically correct barrier for the r-word just like there is for the n-word. Both words can be equally insulting. I just realized that there is no politically correct word for retard because mentally challenged still sounds offensive. I believe people with disabilities have it worst than any group of individuals because they will never actually be treated the same. They are practically in a category of their own. The r word may be the second most derogatory used word beside the word “gay.” I think retard is worse than the word gay, in a sense that people who are openly gay purposely act gay and your gaydar goes off right away, but people who are retarded do not openly act retarded, they have no choice. This is something they have to live with for the rest of their life. I have become aware of the r-word and I plan not to use it.

I find this question very interesting. On Thursday, It was hard for me to sympathize with Tammy because I could not find any reason to justify why she had 4 kids after growing up in a home with 21 brothers and sisters. She admitted that she grew up in a poor family, so you would think she wouldn’t put her kids in the same position she was once in. I believe that if people really wanted to better themselves they can. My mother moved from Jamaica to Canada and then came to Philadelphia to build a family. She came over to the states with nothing; she was on welfare until she could support herself without it. She worked jobs cleaning up after people, wiping butts, and practically being a maid. She worked multiple jobs and saved up all the money she could. Every penny she made, she saved it. My father was the same way he came from Canada with my mother to Philadelphia. He used all his talents and skills to work and do side jobs. For extra money, he fixed anything he could. People can do anything they want it just depends on how bad they really want it. I believe people in poverty get comfortable with their lifestyle and start to accept it for what it is.
The way I see it is if you cannot provide for yourself, you should not have multiple children because it just makes it harder on them. I believe it is extremely selfish to have so many kids if you are poor. At least try to get yourself together and improve the quality of your life. A baby is a huge responsibility and is very costly. Why would you bring a child into the world, if you can’t care for them? I would like to finish college become established and then start a family. If I was Tammy, I would do everything possible to make a better life for my kids and myself. I think her father would be even more proud of her if she was not just following in his footsteps but if she created her own footsteps, steps that lead to a higher social class. I agree with the fact that it seems people in poverty have more kids. It might be because they can get more money for claiming them on their taxes. It doesn’t made sense to me as to why someone would be that selfish and I will never understand it. As a parent, I want my kid to look up to me and be able to receive everything they desire. I want my child to look to up to me as more than just a poor parent, but as a parent who did everything she could for them.

Like a broken bone takes time to heal, so does everything else or that’s what we are taught. School might be hard, but then after some studying we learn to adjust. Riding a bike is a difficult task, but after the training wheels come off we learn to take off into the wind. When it comes to materials of the world, we learn how to live with them. When thinks get hard, we develop coping skills so they don’t seem as hard anymore. When it comes to people adjusting to other people that they see as different, things are harder to fix. When discrimination comes into play, we need more than time to heal things. People just don’t get over discrimination because discrimination of one race leads to racism of that race. Racism is then past down from generation to generation. Racism is like a fashion that doesn’t go out of style, it just keeps reoccurring. Racism will occur as long as we see other races as being superior or different.

When it comes to humans, there are so many disparities. Did you ever think why animals aren’t racist against other animals of their own kind? Animals learn to live amongst each other with not many differences. Humans have the ability to think for themselves, but are so easily influenced by outside sources, like society and the media. Our eyes are prone to noticing differences. It is because humans are not machines; they are not built to see the same. As soon as something different appears our neurons start coming together to form thought patterns that hint “DIFFERENT” and we feel the need to observe it with skepticism. There are so many separations in this world that makes us different than the other person like social economic status, religion, gender, color, race, etc. People need time to get use to different things or different people for that matter. Unless we have seen every country in the world, than there will always be someone different than what we are use to.

Everyone takes pride in their country just like you take pride in your favorite football team. We think our country may be superior to others and that makes the others not like us because we think we are better or they might think they are better. Wanting to be the best creates controversy leading to stereotypes about the other country in order to belittle the opponent. Stereotypes are another result of racism. As long as stereotypes exist racism will follow. They way to eliminate stereotypes is by understanding where they originated from then that will erase the byproduct of inherent differences. Until then, Racism will always exist because we do not take the time to understand different cultures. Instead of seeing black and white or Chinese and Japanese or Rican and Mexican, if we could just see a human race as the only race then racism would not exist amidst people that are divided amongst different regions of the world.

We live in a world where people do not want to offend people of other races. I believe as long as political correctness exists there will always be an issue over race. Race is the first thing people look at. Race is the most apparent physical feature. The color of our skin, whether it is brown, black, peach or white, matters the most. The only time race is not an issue to us is when we are too young to notice that our playmates are nothing like us, he or she is now black, white, etc. Technically, the race matter that is the most significant issue is black vs. white. Everything is black and white, all the other races are not an issue. Other races are important as well, but in the region we live in the biggest issues lies between blacks and whites.

Over the years, I have heard ridiculous things like white people not wanting their families to mix with others races because they do not want their race to be wiped out and white people are being worried about being the minority because of immigrants coming to the United States. These things may not be true, but amongst some families they are discussed. Black families were so happy to see a “black president” because in the world we live in blacks are believed to be less educated than whites. White and black people both have something to prove. As long as we are living in a world where we are competing against the other race, race will always be an issue.

Did you ever notice that white people never come to black events on campus. There is not a sign that says “No white people” allowed. Yet black people go to white frats and events white people throw. I truly believe that some races stay within their own group because no one understands you like your own kind. It always makes you feel better to see a familiar face. It’s like a white person in a classroom filled with black people. Since some races are not willing to acknowledge other cultures and try to understand them race will always be an issue.

Growing up in a suburban area, race was always an issue. It was like a law that races should not mix. An interracial couple was frowned upon. I quickly learned that many white grandparents do not believe there should be interracial couples, so they pass that down to their children and grandchildren. Some of these older generations’ opinions are viewed highly and respected so this theory keeps getting past down. As long as we have this ideology, race will always be a problem in today’s society. As long as we continuously discuss slavery in every childhood classroom, race will always be an issue. As long as we keep living in our stubborn ways, race will always be an issue.

There are things we learn in life that we do and we don’t know exactly why. For example, when someone sneezes we say “god bless you” automatically. Or after we fart we say “excuse me” or we are taught not to fart in public. We are taught to say please and thank you. We do these things because we are developing etiquette. We want to show others we have manners and that we are polite because we deem it is appropriate. Society has taught us what is appropriate and what is not. Our culture has taught us it is rude to offend people and we never get a second chance to make a first impression. How do we avoid the problem of using the right words in order to be respectful to everyone? The answer is being “politically correct.” We need to be politically correct to avoid all possible accusations of being offensive or saying the wrong thing.

Sometimes people are not politically correct with the intentions of hurting someone. For example, using the term gay or faggot instead of homosexual could be an aim to hurt a homosexual person. In my opinion, political correctness is used the most because of racism. Political correctness will always exist because it has been past down from generation to generation. We may not know why what would say could be offensive, but it does not matter because by being political correct we are being “safe”. Political Correctness ensures us that we will not hurt anyone if we use the proper universal term, but this is not always the case.

Sometimes even if we are being politically correct it still may offend people. When I take any standardized test I always marked African American because I always thought of it as the “politically correct” way to say black. When I really think about it I do not know anything about Africa. I am American because I was born in the United States, but I would not identify myself as African. My mother is Jamaican and my father identifies himself as French Canadian. He was originally born in Indiana, but moved to Canada as a baby, so he knows nothing about Indiana. Both of his parents are Haitian. He speaks French and Creole. If someone called my mother or father African American they would feel offended because they identify themselves as Haitian or West Indian.

I prefer to be identified as black but not African American. I always wondered why it became politically correct to say African American rather than black? Why is it politically correct to say Caucasian instead of white? Where did these terms come from and who made them universal. Once we find out the origin of where they came from I believe then we can truly understand why we need to use them to be politically correct.

Stereotypes did not get invited on their own. A person did not just wake up one morning and say hey Chinese people are going to be considered loud and black people are going to be considered ghetto. We still have stereotypes because they exist. What I mean by this is not all black people love fried chicken and watermelon and not all gay men talk with lisps. Believing every stereotype is true for every individual within a culture is just ridiculous. The reason stereotypes exist is because at one time or another there was enough people of the same culture to make a stereotype a defining characteristic of that culture. Stereotypes are simply generalizations about a culture. For instance say you are a male that has never dated a Puerto Rican girl, someone who has may suggest to you watch out for those Rican girls they are crazy. We know not all Puerto Ricans are crazy but it is a generalization about them. Some stereotypes can be viewed as cultural stamps. For years, I worked at the same job and it requires me to meet different families and greet them at the door. There are numerous times an Indian family would walk in and smell of heavy curry creating the stereotypes that Indians stink. They do not necessarily stink, it just that the curry is a very potent smell that can linger on a person for days.
I think stereotypes will always exist you just have to be the better person and give everyone the benefit of the doubt. You should never take stereotypes as something literal because like I said they are not true for everyone. It’s interesting to find out what people say when you tell them “What comes to mind when you think of a black person or a Mexican person?” People may think of different thinks but most things that pop into the mind first are the stereotypes that exist if you are neither black nor Mexican.
I like to think of stereotypes like traveling the world through a television. If we have never traveled the world, we rely on what we see on television or what someone tells us. We use this to imagine what that place would be like. Well the same applies with stereotypes. If I have never encountered a gay person, I am going to think of all the stereotypes first that are associated with gay people. It may not be the right thing to do, but that is how society works. If we cannot experience something first hand, we rely of technology or other resources.
To answer the question why don’t we change the stereotypes? Well, it takes a lot to change a stereotype because stereotypes have been repeated for years and years. Google has a feature where you do not have to finish typing what you want to search but it will create a list for you. If we type something like “why do black people” into google , google finishes it with things like “have big lips”, “say aks”, “have nappy hair”, etc. That alone says a lot. Millions of people use google everyday and it is hard to stir away from stereotypes if negative stereotypes are advertised with a culture right away. Overall, it is important to take the time to learn about stereotypes and where they originated first, so then we can overcome them and look past them.