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11 years ago @ Wonkette - Tamerlan Tsarnaev Came... · 0 replies · +3 points

I would propose a friendly amendment to your list:
8) war on drugs and the resulting criminalization of a generation of Black and Brown Americans

11 years ago @ Wonkette - Tamerlan Tsarnaev Came... · 0 replies · +2 points

There is no reasoning with these people. One dares not question answers handed down from on high by the Almighty FSM for fear of swift and brutal retaliation from the "loving God and Creator". More radical religionists=more instances of random violence directed at civilian populations. So far, the violence has (for the most part, possible excepting Lockerbie) been carried out by radical groups and wacko individuals. The shit will really hit the fan when the radical theocracies go all in.

11 years ago @ Wonkette - Tamerlan Tsarnaev Came... · 0 replies · +2 points

I'm going to have to assume that there were no takers among the faculty. Life as a law professor has to be one of the best gigs ever. I'd like someone to front me an endowed chair and tenure. The only thing better would be a spot on the federal bench, or maybe Pope.

11 years ago @ Wonkette - Hillary Clinton Electe... · 0 replies · +4 points

Maybe, but of course polls have clearly shown that an infinite number of events will occur between now and the 2016 primary season. (52 yes, 40 no, 8 "what's an event", 1/12/13 New York Times/CBS) Some of these inevitable future events, according to recent polling, may have an impact on the primary field (53 yes, 27 no, 20 "no idea what fucking planet I inhabit", Quinnipiac 2/14/13). For example, according to a recent poll, a significant majority of likely New Jersey primary voters believe that by October 2014, Chris "Krispy Kreme" Christie will have lost 350 pounds, forsaken the GOP for the Democratic Party, and, in early November 2014 (just prior to the mid-term Congressional election) completed the New York Marathon in under 3 hours, bagging first place in the newly-created Clydesdale Division. This dramatic turn of events will catapult the formerly-rotund New Jersey Governor into the front-runner's position for the Democratic nomination.

11 years ago @ Wonkette - Bronx Democrat Caught ... · 0 replies · +8 points

We had a lawyer here in Minnesota who for years would bring a bible with him to court, placing it prominently on counsel table during jury trials. His presentations to the jurors were laced with biblical references, more like homilies than voir dire, opening statement and final argument. Pretty much no one was surprised when he was disbarred for stealing money from his clients, including paralyzed children, to purchase luxury vehicles and vacation homes in Colorado ski resorts. He did time, was released in five years, and later committed suicide. Moral of the story: Never trust anyone who carries a bible.

11 years ago @ Wonkette - Massachusetts School O... · 0 replies · +13 points

But if you FEED the children, you are only enabling their parents' shiftless behavior, no? Parents will simply stop paying for the over-priced, barely-edible and totally-devoid-of-nutritional-value garbage these vendors are throwing at their children. When that happens, productive members of society will have to pick up the tab, and they don't want to pay for that shit, either. Far better to teach the youngsters a lesson, so they don't grow up to be "victims" like their under-employed, or even un-employed, parents, amirite?

11 years ago @ Wonkette - Massachusetts School O... · 1 reply · +16 points

And they'd better make damn sure they declare the value of that bartered lunch on their income tax return, too.

11 years ago @ Wonkette - Adult Babies Rick Sant... · 0 replies · +1 points

Yeah, that would have worked well for the GOP! Hahahahahaha (choke, gasp) Hahahaha

11 years ago @ Wonkette - 86-Year-Old Minnesota ... · 0 replies · +1 points

This happened in St. Peter, so it would have to be the Minnesota River, don'cha know.

11 years ago @ Wonkette - If You Look At Pix Of ... · 0 replies · +4 points

$300,000 million is a paltry $300 Billion. Not nearly enough to scratch the surface of funding for the war in Iraq, which even the U.S. government admits was $750 Billion. Forget taking care of the returning veterans' healthcare needs. Oh, wait, I guess the government pretty much DID that. The war will certainly set us back in the trillions before the final aftermath is written into the history books, which will take generations. Still, I think Planned Parenthood would appreciate funding at this level, and I do think they would do more to serve the needs of society with the money than the Department of Defense does with the money it receives.