gdp's Comments

Vent : A Hedgehog Does a Sponge

Mon, 8 Mar 2010 22:35:01 +0000

Ahem. I thought it was cruel and unusual punishment that they had only one sponge with all those hedgehogs waiting. I mean, really....they couldn't have bought the jumbo pack? Oh, and FYI my love...I had the dialogue at the end translated. It loosely translates to: "And so unveils the history of this hedgehog baby...mistaken by his sponge...with other hedgehogs... But like many love...unfortunately...not reciprocated." Utter perfection! Almost makes you want to move to France, right??! xoxo <3

Vent : While Having my Morning Coffee

Fri, 5 Mar 2010 20:50:22 +0000

Oh, Ronnie! WOOHOO!!!!!:D:D:D That is FABULOUS news, sweetie! Oh, I am so TOTALLY glad you followed that spot-on instinct of yours! Talk about "cosmic payoff"....that. is. it!! And your attitude for the future? The hours will come. 'Cause they will. Hard work and dedication are not overlooked...especially in your industry....they are a huge commodity. You and I are so much alike, sweetie...many balls in the air...many different hats...always room to fit in a few more.... Bring it, Universe! We'll make it work!!;) I'm so proud and happy for you, handsome! You will always land on your feet....just like the f!ck-you cat!! xoxo <3

Vent : Doubt

Wed, 3 Mar 2010 17:52:46 +0000

God, Ronnie! I freakin' LOVE this post! It's like you're inside my head...(which, admittedly is getting more and more crowded as the years pass)- I found myself thinking, "Wait. I haven't seen that flick"...and you say, "I don't want to spoil it for anyone who hasn't seen it." I say (to the dog), "I tend to go with my gut"...and you say, "I make my choices based on my gut feelings." Get outta my head, mister! I will tell you this. I've thought about this issue enough that I've polled friends and fam to find out what they've regretted more: things that they acted on...or things that they didn't. The majority ruled that they'd regretted more the times they didn't act based on that "gut feeling". Second-guessing yourself seems to be part of the human condition...that sense of ambiguity. (God, Ron...I love this word! I must use it more often!) But, it can cripple you...think about how often marketing companies prey on this most vulnerable of emotions: "Don't let this happen to you!" It creates that gnawing doubt. Dangerous stuff. You've outdone yourself with this one, sweetie! xo <3

Vent : Popeye the Sailor Man

Tue, 2 Mar 2010 01:07:05 +0000

Oh, Ronnie....you SLAY me! You water pick-toting, dental floss-carrying, compact mirror and flashlight-packing MANIAC, you! I can just picture you....with a perfectly straight face...telling that poor girl that she was "all clear". Well, your secret is out now, my dear....we ALL KNOW what you're capable of! And, we all know where we can find the mirror to see when you're LYING THROUGH YOUR TEETH... Pun totally intended. xo

Vent : A True Confession

Tue, 2 Mar 2010 00:55:17 +0000

You GO, handsome! First of all...LOVING the banner of the Brooklyn Bridge! Second...I dawdled and watched the Will & Grace clip....a classic that I've seen before but loved seeing again. As for idiot-MAC-guy, you know that you're not the first, nor the last to be put off by his smug, arrogant attitude. We're all aware that sales are down across the board...the last thing anyone wants is a desperate, cocky, pushy salesman. He got just what he deserves...the memory of the back of your head as you walked out the door. ;) As always, you're my hero! xo <3

Vent : Viva la Difference

Thu, 25 Feb 2010 00:19:02 +0000

Oh God Ronnie.... It's like you've gotten inside of their heads or something. Are you a pet psychologist in your spare time?? Talk about "spot-on" (pun intended). I'm loving the way the kitty's paws are just so...just like those little toddlers that pose for the beauty contests. It's sooooo freakin' true. A dog says, "I LOVE YOU....do YOU love me?"....while a cat says "F*ck you. You may go away now." Talk about self-esteem on four legs.... You NAILED this one, my friend. You totally ROCK. ;) <3<3<3<3<3<3<3 (One heart for every time I laughed out loud during the reading of this post)

Vent : Let’s Talk About Dust Bunnies

Mon, 22 Feb 2010 11:33:49 +0000

("shhhhh......I'm hunting wabbit.....") very first thing to pop into my head...after three therapy sessions to discuss my intense fear at a rabbit the size of a small goat, that is... :o Ah dust bunnies...the way I figure it, you've got two ways you can go: #1: Buy yourself a Swiffer Duster and do a daily soft-shoe and they'll stick to it like Tiger to a prostitute or, #2: Decide to raise the little suckers on your own. Give 'em names and chores...and bring 'em up the Mafioso way...telling 'em that periodically they'll need to "thin the herd"....if ya know what I'm sayin'.... Great post, my love. A subject very close to my heart! <3 Thanks for the Monday morning smile! (And the therapy)

Vent : Calling All Disco Queens

Fri, 19 Feb 2010 21:13:32 +0000

(Laughing) I can TOTALLY see you rocking down the house, Ronnie! I'm sure the people downstairs thought you were having some sort of seizure...or maybe a scuffle with a very large mouse... It's something about that beat that sends one's hips to grinding...and fits in perfectly with your on-the-spot summation of "slow foreplay and then builds to a musical orgasm as it crescendos into a glorious climax"....but, of course...for us gals...there's multiple (ahem) "crescendos"... I adore the fact that you live life the way it was meant to be lived, handsome....full-throttle and with no abandon...at least, when it comes to your disco...now, move over and make room! If I'm gonna do the Travolta point, roll and shoot, I'm gonna need some space! WOOHOO! Do the hustle! (Oops...wrong decade) Love you! <3

Vent : The Aphrodisiac Apple

Wed, 17 Feb 2010 11:36:59 +0000

Wow! Congratulations! Gee...I can't imagine why you'd want to leave the virus-defenseless, spyware-attracting PC that so many of us suffer with. (Sorry, Bill...but gee....Apple's got a valid point with those ads) I'm glad you're going with your gut...which is either hungry, or knows what you should be pouring your creative juices into. (And I mean that in the most G-rated way possible.) But the truth is, if it feels right...ya gotta do it! Right? I've heard you can really get creative with a MAC..it's what all the hip graphic artists use. I wonder, though...can you transfer any of your software from your PC? Do you have to buy a new version of Microsoft Office? (Or, does MAC have their own?) You'll have to keep us posted on this love affair, Ronnie...maybe, someday...I'll be making the jump and we'll be having a threesome. (insert cute little face with the confused, bulging, different-sized eyes here...where's those emotions when I need 'em??) Boy...upgrade to DSL and a new MAC...all in about a month? I'm glad all that overtime is seriously paying off, my love...you TOTALLY deserve it! xoxo

Vent : Where’s the Nearest Fire Hydrant?

Tue, 16 Feb 2010 02:05:31 +0000

Okay. I would've commented sooner, but I had to pee....and pee.....and pee. So, evidently everyone on Google knows all about this "Peeing-In-Da-Winter" thing: "The reason is that in order to minimize heat loss during cold exposure, the body restricts the flow of blood to the skin and superficial tissues. This is called 'peripheral vasoconstriction'. The result is that blood is shunted to the body core, the volume of blood circulating in the core is higher, and mean arterial blood pressure is higher. Blood volume, and hence blood pressure, are regulated by the kidney, which either reabsorbs or sheds water from the body according to how well hydrated we are. So when you are exposed to the cold and your blood pressure rises, the kidney interprets this as due to an excess circulating volume, and sets about losing salt and water in order bring down the blood volume and hence blood pressure. As a result you produce more urine." "Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..................................................." Oh! So, there you go, sweetie. I just Googled "increased urination in winter?" and I was golden. And so, evidently, are you. So, "Pee, oh sweet man! Pee until spring comes! You're going to....anyway!!" And as for peeing sitting down? I've just had it explained to me that it's much quieter then the traditional full-stream-ahead method. How did we get on this subject again?? Who loves ya, baby?? xoxo :*

Vent : Happy Valentines Day!

Sat, 13 Feb 2010 01:56:12 +0000

Oh, Ronnie....how adorable are you? And is that arrow super-glued to your cute little chubby hand? And that rod that attaches to the base? Exactly where does it attach to your sweet little bod? Hmmmmm? That said, you know who loves ya, baby? You know it...right? And Ronnie? Joan SCARED me! I'm not pressing that button. Ever. Again. She's very, very scary. All the love in my heart got lost for a second there and I was scared shitless. Not an appropriate thing to say on Valentine's Day, my love. Or is it?? Huh. xoxo <3

Vent : Who Blogs More, Men or Women?

Wed, 10 Feb 2010 22:47:44 +0000

Aw, Ronnie....you're such a deep thinker....that's just one of the things I love about you. ;) Women...definitely waaaaay more women. In my super-early blogging days, I remember my friend Margarete telling me that she'd force her husband to sit down and read one of my posts...and that she'd be laughing over his shoulder. He'd say, "It's cute." ...And I'd always think, "Well. I guess guys don't get me." Now, I'm probably at about 30% guys, I'd say. But you're right...guys aren't as likely to comment. Only I don't think it's 'cause they're not as communicative as women...I think it's 'cause they're too lazy to click those extra buttons... (sorry guys...of course, I didn't mean you...) xoxo

Vent : March of a Penguin

Mon, 8 Feb 2010 22:27:41 +0000

Oh, Ronnie! My poor, sweet Ronnie! I'm soooooo happy you trudged through that snowstorm...because you gave me the hardest laugh I've had ALL WEEK! First of all, thank you to Ron's dad for throwing his poor tired ass out of bed every day to go to work, or we'd never get the hilarious mental image of 5'7" Ronnie sinking into 6' of snow......HA! Second, I can see you will do ANYTHING to avoid hat-hair. So, now you've lost an umbrella, but you've gained a giant toothpick....which may come in handy for picking out those ice-wedgies from that 6' snowdrift... I shall not torture you about the ciggies....'specially since I'm more than willing to risk life & limb for my vino....so...ya know, pot/kettle, Ronnie. Besides...you were already OUT. And just out of curiosity....exactly how many times have you seen toilet paper being blown across the sidewalk?? 'Cause that analogy (while hilarious) was just a tad frightening.... Batten down, my friend....Wednesday promises more! Ya wanted snow? I'll give you SNOW!! xoxo

Vent : Now I Can Bitch and Wine

Sat, 6 Feb 2010 01:38:38 +0000

I could probably support this wine company all. by. myself. Okay, Ron...what is it with you and all the lightweight wine drinkers? C'mon, people! It's freakin' cold outside and it's February!!! WHAT ELSE are you gonna do on a cold winter's night?? As we speak, I'm polishing off a much-deserved glass of Cloudy and an equally-much-deserved piece of key lime pie....and I am in gastro-heaven. (That's the PG-version, anyway....:x) I'm glad you didn't fall for that 'ole Bitchy marketing ploy, sweetie....they probably get more wine sold this way. Yikes...there's gotta be more to buying wine than a catchy label...although, this one's definitely a KEEPER. My sister brought me a bottle of "Mommy's Time Out"....I have to admit...it sits on my server, unopened....but I DO loooove the label! Great post, as always! Love you- xoxo

Vent : Maria from Russia

Fri, 5 Feb 2010 03:54:24 +0000

Oh, Ron. You DO realize that you've probably broken poor Maria-from-Russia's heart. And I can't help but to wonder how Apple would feel about their precious "iTunes" being used as an excuse for Maria to want to kiss you lower and lower. Maybe due to the language barrier, iTunes will finally wind up releasing that underground copy of George Jetson dropping the soap on the Way to The Forum. It's bound to come out after all this. Love you, ~k PS: Are you sure you didn't misread the name? Maybe it really said "Mario"?

Vent : Need Help Choosing a Laptop

Mon, 1 Feb 2010 17:49:38 +0000

MEOW! Hissssssssssss! Oh, you slay me! Are we gonna find out one day that you're a closet Hello Kitty fanatic, Ron? Me thinks you doth protest too much! I'm a PC gal myself....although like you, I've fantasized about defecting to the MAC side. A friend of mine has a MAC laptop and it was like learning another language! Maybe just me, but I was totally lost. My present laptop is a Toshiba, circa '07...and I've no real complaints. I've had to speed her up a bit...but heck...she's 3...that's like...70 in computer years! I'll probably stay w/PC...only 'cause I don't feel like learning a whole new operating system. Connor got a new computer for X-mas/B-day and it has Windows 7. He likes it...but he's a kid. What does he know? (He's not here, so I can say that.) Good luck, my man. Walk down that big ole' computer aisle at Best Buy and see if one of those little puppies calls your name. Just steer clear if you see any claws. (MEOW!) xoxo ~k<3

Vent : Time Released Freshness

Fri, 29 Jan 2010 11:37:16 +0000

So...you think it's nothing but total.....chocolate mousse? I don't get it. o.0 HA! Great post, Ron! (As always!) Oh, God....you should SEE me standing in this aisle....trying to understand how THIS one is 30 oz, but it's concentrated-times-3 so it cleans 64 loads, versus the 48oz one that's only 2X concentrated and does 40 loads...and the prices and the choices and the SMELLS and some have softener already built in and some have bleach and some even have Febreeze and some are made for dark colors only or for washing only in cold water and some are liquid and some are powder and some are anti-allergenic for sensitive skin.....and it's just TOOOOO MUCH!!! Have you noticed that TIDE has monopolized most of the market in this venue? So, they're the laundry conglomerate, so I never pick them. I'm all about the underdog. My final choice is extremely scientific...based on years of extensive research into stain-fighting-power based on different types of soil, climate and water hardness conditions: I see which one smells the prettiest. Yup. I stand there and open 'em all up and take a whiff...some make me grimace and gag...whilst others are like lying on a hammock in a flowery meadow after a spring rain. Then I buy Cheer ('cause it's the only one that actually gets the clay dirt from this area out of da boy's clothes) and I go home. Ron, you always manage to cut through all the mousse, I mean crap...and get to the heart of the matter. I just love that about you! Have a fabu weekend, my favorite Philly friend! Stay warm! o.0 xoxo :D <3 ^_^ :$ xD B) My recent post Restrictions Apply

Vent : Standing in My Personal Space

Wed, 27 Jan 2010 12:42:05 +0000

Well, Ron....I think you may be onto something here. It seems like people have somehow completely forgotten they share this planet with other human beings. I cannot tell you how many times I've thought to myself, "Gee....(s)he doesn't even know I'm here." It's positively scary. So, it's quite the conundrum. You've got your people who want to practically climb inside you, 'cause they can't seem to be close enough whilst interacting with you...and then you've got the ones who will inadvertently plow you down because they can't even acknowledge that you exist at all. Honestly, I'm not feeling the warm & fuzzies over either one of these. I say we hit 'em with pepper spray and just run. There's no graceful exit from people like this anyway....;) My recent post Eyedropper Envy

Vent : Ok, I Thought I’d Seen Everything

Tue, 26 Jan 2010 00:30:00 +0000

Okaaaay....now, we've BOTH seen it all. So. Farm animals defecating is supposed to be...what? Romantic? Charming?? What's next? Liquid dispensers for when they've got a case of the runs?!? And that sound?? What did you call it? ...actually sounds like one of the munchkins from the Wizard of Oz having an earth-shattering orgasm when you press on it’s back...I could not have said it better! Although, I'm not sure if it's crying in exquisite ecstasy or agony....that heifer looks constipated by the looks of that poo! We'll call him "Curtis the Constipated Cow". You will keep track of the sales on this item for us, won't ya Ronnie? I'd like a covert photo of each and every customer...for research purposes, of course. It'll give us someone to make fun of when we get bored. FABULOUS post, my friend...I'm glad you're not so gnarly from NY that you can't still be surprised!! Love you! xo <3 My recent post Unsubscribe

Vent : Transcending Gender

Sat, 23 Jan 2010 03:46:24 +0000

Hey Ronnie! Oftentimes, your posts are so thought-provoking that I'll read it in the morning and ponder it throughout my day...returning at night to re-read it and ponder it some more before commenting. It's like a foreign country to me...and the few times I've stumbled across a documentary on transgenders, I'm immediately mesmerized because I want to learn and understand what it's like to be them. Here's what I don't understand: I'll bet if you polled all the people who have watched this film, you would discover that the least represented group would probably be the straight male. Think I'm right? Is it because they can't genetically muster up the sensitivity to have empathy for another person's struggles if they can't personally relate? And is it the same short-circuit that prevents straight guys from being comfortable talking about anything that's outside their pre-determined "comfort zone"? I'll take the wager one step further: I'll bet that more wives/gf's would stay close to their man thru a sex change than hubby's/bf's would. I realize that there are exceptions to every rule...that there are great, sensitive straight guys out there...but for the masses, how much is taught behavior and how much is inherent? I mean...as the Mom of three boys, can I truly make an impact on how much empathy they'll have as adults, or am I banging my head against the wall for nothing? Okay, now my head hurts. I say this: We each get one shot at life...and no-one has the right to tell us the best way to live it. Great post, as always my favorite Philly friend. Sorry this is so long...if I rent this soapbox by the hour, is there a discount? My recent post OVERHEARD!!!