What it all boils down to, however, is self esteem, If a girl can look past the magazine covers, the television shows, and the superficial world, and be happy with herself, then that is all that matters. But our society is so stuck on the "perfect" image that it has burned a hole in girls heads to make them think they will never be good enough when they are already great. why do we leave it to hollywood to tell us what is acceptable and what is not, the world is all about variety, not everyone likes the same things, or else this world would be bland. Girls just need to be able to look at the whole society and say "you know what. i dont give a shit" just like guys do.
Part of the societal problem against girls, are themselves, plain and simple. Girls compete against each other, and if they feel threatened, the names start coming out about these girls, whore, slut, and all the others. i have actually had this conversation with girls, and they said they tend to feel threatened by girls that look better than them. Here is a little secret, confidence is what makes you noticed, if you stay confident in yourself and show that you have nothing to worry about, that other girl does not matter. Guys on the other hand, if they lose out, they say oh well and move on to another, able to not give a shit. Guys do make fun of other guys too, but not as badly as girls do to each other.
As much as any guy may try to deny that they do not "conform" to the norms of society, they do in one way or another. Although it may be something small that it is barely noticeable. However, guys do have the upper advantage on girls, not because girls are pressured more, but because guys are alot better at not giving a shit. Everytime there is a guy on a magazine cover, he is always muscular, 6 pack abs, tan, the whole deal. In my eyes, that of a guy, i would think for girls this is the dream guy and is what any girl would want and never be able to pass up. Therefore, guys get the idea that if your not in shape then girls will not give you a chance. Now, guys are more heartleess and superficial than girls are, which makes the pressure harder, but again, that is because guys are better at not giving a shit. But there are girls as well who are superficial and only want the guys who are tan, muscular, have money, etc.. Look at all of your realty shows, how many have people overweight, tanless people? its a disgrace, people should be judged by character, not looks.
Growing up, my main group of friends were white, but that wasnt because we did not want black people around, we always called everyone to play baseball, basketball, football, whatever, and sometimes they would accept, sometimes not. There were tons of kids, through little league and other friends, that i would see, they would be of another race, and we would get along great because we never saw color, we just saw each other. When i got to Penn State, i never thought to myself "There is a ton of white people" because i never cared to look at color. I noticed alot of asians due to i didnt grow up around many, so that was cool to see more cultures like that, but in the end, i never cared to look at color, because i never judge a place like that. So i believe some people can have a head start on the stages, and yes some can fall back, but by the time i got to Penn State, i had matured enough to where color was not a matter for me, and i tried not to see things in color, but to just see things as they are. This campus could be dominantly black, i would still walk around with a smile, being polite to everyone i see, and going about my day.
I do think that i have been through most of the stages to where i saw the racism and inequality, tried to make a connection to better understand the sides of my friends, and then been pushed away because i am white and cannot understand. Also i have had black people use racism on me, in which i was thought to myself "how am i to help if they dont want it from white people and just become racist to us?" But i still understood that not all black people were like this due to knowing many black people who werent that way. Plus my parents always raised me to understand that everyone is the same, deserves a chance, and nobody is below me, i am not better than anyone else, and we are all equal.
I am white male and i grew up in a city that was dominantly black. The city was probably a 65/35 percent black to white, so i have associated with black people my whole life. needless to say im not sure i was ever in the pre awakening stage because of the fact i grew up with other races. I cannot remember the first time i saw racism on the black community, but it did happen because of the white community, there were alot of older people who remembered the city when it was safer and more multi cultural, but this was when the steel mills were booming. They had troubles with being able to go with the times. So i did see racism at a young age, but never from myself.
As for the girls and whether or not they should be ashamed in it, why? Why be ashamed of something natural? I understand that it is not something that just is a natural topic of discussion, and rarely do you hear a girl come out of nowhere and say "im bleeding today". It is just not a topic of discussion that society has allowed to be spoken of, but there are people out there who understand the naturalness of the whole process and have no problem with it. If guys had periods, yes it would be different in life, guys tend to not care about the things they talk about and it is a guys world, sorry to say. But as for Sam and his analogy, i think he made a good point in saying, why do women have to hide something that is natural?
As for Sam bringing it up in lecture, i think he is right, its a natural thing that occurs, it is not a chosen action of the body, it happens naturally, and the fact that him and his wife have such an open life and do not find many things offensive is amazing. His usage of women and their periods i assume was his attempt to make guys see what its like, and more importantly white guys, to be looked down upon, or outcasted. He uses a great analogy with the being left handed, you dont realize the struggles because you dont think about it because you dont have to. grant it the period may be a little far stretched as an analogy, its still something to think about when thinking that people can be outcasted, not because of who they are, but because of the natural things that make them who they are.
Here is the deal with guys and why they are so "uncomfortable" with knowing that girls are having their periods, and this is coming from a guys point of view. When a guy hears about a girl having a period, its more of a sexual thing, at least the way i see it. no guy wants to hear about a girls vagina emitting blood because they think about the vagina as a sexual pleasure, and not as something that bleeds. I personally could care less when a girl says she is bleeding or however the term is used. My ex girlfriend and i used to talk about hers, and when i knew it was around, i would be like "ok" and have no other reaction but to knowing she wasnt pregnant. Now i always helped her out, let her anger against me go, and do what made her happy because i understand it is a stressful and often times painful time for females.
As for our current society, why is it important to look back at the history of things and make the current people feel guilt? Why can't we just realize what happened and try and change things, make the racism less and work on bringing races together, rather than constantly reminding people of the racism that once occurred? if we intend to move on in this country and society, we need to realize the history is in the past, and it will stay there, it is up to us to make the future a better place for all of our eventual children to live in.
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