en-us https://www.intensedebate.com/users/344181 Comments by dougranck http://frontlineyouthsb.blogspot.com/2011/06/one-week-later.html#IDComment167675720 Yeah . . . it's Doug but I'm posting for Eden who sent me an email from Costa Rica. Here is what she said: "i am feeling happy to be with my family, but i miss having all of you here and being able to talk about what happens each day and such" Tue, 28 Jun 2011 20:06:34 +0000 http://frontlineyouthsb.blogspot.com/2011/06/one-week-later.html#IDComment167675720 http://www.studentministry.org/im-struggling-with-re-entry-into-america-after-being-in-haiti/#IDComment58258446 Hang in there, Tim! Give yourself time. What you are thinking and feeling is normal and expected. You know and I know God will help you sort it out. Talk it through with "safe" friends and walk with God. In missions work de-briefing is often considered a low priority when in fact it is one of the more important things we do with our students and ourselves. It only took me 15 missions trips to realize this! Praying for you! You will never be fully "over" your experience there. God has given you a bigger heart. Mon, 22 Feb 2010 22:37:13 +0000 http://www.studentministry.org/im-struggling-with-re-entry-into-america-after-being-in-haiti/#IDComment58258446 http://youthminblog.com/2009/09/the-junior-high-youth-worker/#IDComment33067068 I love Jr. High leaders who know how to play, be a pastor, are not afraid to relate with the parents, and are not consumed with producing neat and tidy Jr. Highers who are fully developed in their faith (sorry, that's not possible). If they are happy "planting seeds," building a foundation and investing in the lives of these youth we will have a fun adventure together and Christ will be honored. Thu, 3 Sep 2009 23:59:01 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/09/the-junior-high-youth-worker/#IDComment33067068 http://youthminblog.com/2009/09/weird-science-or-helpful-research/#IDComment32928065 Right on, Chris! A balanced teaching of the basics is so important. We all like variety but repetition of the basics in a creative way helps to embed the seed deep. Considering most communications people say we need to "receive" something at least seven times in order to get it I doubt we will ever overcommunicate any fundamentals of the Christian faith. Wed, 2 Sep 2009 20:44:22 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/09/weird-science-or-helpful-research/#IDComment32928065 http://youthminblog.com/2009/07/volunteer-training-topics/#IDComment28120768 I believe we can never do enough training on character issues and time management Thu, 23 Jul 2009 18:49:27 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/07/volunteer-training-topics/#IDComment28120768 http://youthminblog.com/2009/07/beyond-the-chaperone/#IDComment28120538 Sorry for the delayed response David. I have been out of town on meetings. It is the 30 minutes before students show. We have some students who show while we are meeting but they are right next door and we break before the bulk of the group shows. For some staff it is a push to show a little earlier but most are there within five minutes of the start time. They like not having to come out an extra night and so are willing to make this work. Thu, 23 Jul 2009 18:47:22 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/07/beyond-the-chaperone/#IDComment28120538 http://youthminblog.com/2009/07/make-time/#IDComment26794641 Right on, Sara! People make time for things they really want to do. I always use the illustration if somebody were to offer an all expenses paid trip to Hawaii for us leaving a week from today we would do everything possible to make that happen. When we say we don't have time for something we are almost always saying it's not high enough on my priority list for me to make the time. I'm for time management, creating margins, boundaries and priorities but not having time is mostly not an authentic excuse. Thu, 9 Jul 2009 16:06:26 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/07/make-time/#IDComment26794641 http://youthminblog.com/2009/07/needs-for-networking/#IDComment26720648 Great words, Kelly! Thanks for the comment, David . . . you make a good point. It certainly depends on the culture of the community. Both Kelly and I operate in a tourist town a successful, collaborative "big event" is rare sponsored by any age level of participating churches. Other communities are different. This is where knowing each other and translating the culture becomes so valuable. I have found it best to identify another church or two who want to do something together. If others want to join us they are more than welcome but at least we have a "critical mass" for planning and implementation. Kelly would also tell you our network team meeting effectiveness has been a "roller coaster" over the years. Some years we have great participation and others we just have the faithful few. As network coordinator for the area I do my best to build relationships with everybody but am often surprised by the lack of buy-in to giving up one hour a month for lunch to be with teammates. What network frustrations do you deal with in your area? What works best for you in getting others to own networking as a necessity? Wed, 8 Jul 2009 20:18:17 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/07/needs-for-networking/#IDComment26720648 http://youthminblog.com/2009/06/our-church-not-big-church/#IDComment23750203 I've used the Q and A time with adults before. Works well and I need to get back to it. Jeremy, I really liked your line, "The church leadership may need to realize that there is a lack of student integration during the Sunday services." It is really easy to listen to the loudest and most articulate voices in the church when it comes to music and aesthetic choices in worship. If an older adult doesn't like a particular style they can state an argument pretty well. If one of the youth is courageous enough to speak up they can easily get drowned out. I'm happy our church is starting to understand, even more, how important it is to integrate our youth, college students and young adults. Tue, 9 Jun 2009 21:56:58 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/06/our-church-not-big-church/#IDComment23750203 http://www.studentministry.org/seven-benefits-of-shutting-down-youth-ministry-programs-for-the-summer/#IDComment21957067 Tim, thanks for saying this. I have been saying this and slowing down for years. People ask me how I have stayed in youth ministry for 30 years and why I have long-term volunteers. Part of the answer is found in the summer slow down. I hear way too many youth pastors who gear up in the summer and then wonder why they are feeling so burned out. I will be printing this out to use with our volunteer staff as an affirmation. Thanks for your good thinking. Thu, 21 May 2009 04:55:44 +0000 http://www.studentministry.org/seven-benefits-of-shutting-down-youth-ministry-programs-for-the-summer/#IDComment21957067 http://youthminblog.com/numb-to-numbers/#IDComment20889544 Right on, Shawn! People ask me how many people we have in our youth group and I politely ask, "Which number do you want to know? How many attend on Wednesday? How many attend Sunday? How many are in small groups? OR How many youth consider our church their church and me their pastor? (One time I had a girl who had come to ONE event in two years introduce me to one of her friends as her pastor! Okay then!) That final number is the one I care about because if I am truly being a shepherd I am motivating our leaders to care for the kid who only sits in the pew next to his family or the kid who only comes twice a year to a fun event, etc. just as much as the kid who comes to everything. That is the number that matters to me because it is the flock over which I care. It's not a bragging rights number, it is a call to action number. Wed, 6 May 2009 15:55:33 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/numb-to-numbers/#IDComment20889544 http://youthminblog.com/2009/05/lessons-on-measuring-success/#IDComment20679664 Hey Chris! Thanks for the clarification on "Influence is hard to measure." I need to work on that more too. It's easier to live in denial about where we really are and avoid the hard work of self-assessment. Mon, 4 May 2009 20:47:58 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/05/lessons-on-measuring-success/#IDComment20679664 http://youthminblog.com/2009/05/lessons-on-measuring-success/#IDComment20666001 I love the first lesson, "Influence begins with humility and ends with your faithfulness." Love it so much I had already written a post for this week on this topic. I guess you all will see it soon. I continually need to learn that, "Influence is hard to measure." I so badly want to measure but it is elusive. This is actually a good thing. Not being able to successfully measure influence keeps away the pride that could so easily creep in and leads instead to humility. Mon, 4 May 2009 18:33:33 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/05/lessons-on-measuring-success/#IDComment20666001 http://youthminblog.com/2009/04/4-pointers-toward-helping-parents/#IDComment20120625 Thanks, Kelly! We have to run toward parents, not away. You don't have to be a parent of a teenager or even a parent to have a good relationship with parents. Value the parents as much as you value the youth. Tue, 28 Apr 2009 22:06:16 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/04/4-pointers-toward-helping-parents/#IDComment20120625 http://youthminblog.com/2009/04/a-good-hard-look/#IDComment19831155 You are right on, Chris! I watched the morning session with Bill Hybels at the Shift Conference. He talked about times when he has been criticized or received "hate" mail. He cautioned leaders to "look beyond the yelling" and discover if there might be even one "kernal of truth" in the criticism. In an earlier post I mentioned recording conflict conversations. This gives me the opportunity to reflect on what was said (whether I want to or not). Almost always I find something (even if it is small) from which I can learn or respond. It's so easy to play the blame game and point the finger. Starting with God and ourselves brings the healthiest perspective. Fri, 24 Apr 2009 21:31:34 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/04/a-good-hard-look/#IDComment19831155 http://youthminblog.com/resolving-conflict-oh-boy/#IDComment19495230 Not going on the defensive too quickly is great advice, Shawn. It is so easy to be that and sometimes before you know it. If I know I am heading into a confrontation I am sure to take a pad of paper with me. When the complaints start coming my way, I write them down. This serves a couple of purposes: 1) Helps to diffuse my defensiveness ( a little!) 2) lets somebody know I'm listening and 3) gives me something to look at later in my time of reflection and prayer. Sometimes it is best to let your confronter know you will take these comments, think/pray about them and then respond (after you have calmed down or thought through them more). Mon, 20 Apr 2009 21:12:54 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/resolving-conflict-oh-boy/#IDComment19495230 http://youthminblog.com/filling-the-vision-tanks/#IDComment18877277 Great comments but if I had to narrow it down to one I would echo what Seth said in keeping it simple. We all go to conferences/training days and come back with 52 points that will make our ministry better. I now realize (and it took me awhile) that if I don't focus it to one, two or three action points almost nothing will get done in followup. Keeping our vision clear with adult leaders is to communicate something simple and repeatable. Thu, 16 Apr 2009 17:52:41 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/filling-the-vision-tanks/#IDComment18877277 http://youthminblog.com/2009/04/3-tips-for-for-a-long-term-team/#IDComment18681645 I would make one other observation . . . some of our youth leaders "get it" more than others when it comes to truly pastoring teenagers. In music, a drummer either has that inner beat or they don't. It's almost impossible to train somebody to keep a steady rhythm. I sometimes think this is true in training youth leaders in youth involvement. I believe all my leaders genuinely love youth and want to see them know and grow in Christ but some are more naturals when it comes to getting in the lives of students. I encourage the others and continue training but I also understand their level of involvement may be different. As long as they are a team player, love youth and demonstrate availability, faithfulness, teachableness and responsiveness I am happy to partner with them. Mon, 13 Apr 2009 18:11:25 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/04/3-tips-for-for-a-long-term-team/#IDComment18681645 http://youthminblog.com/2009/03/the-1-key-ingredient-to-building-relationships-with-teens/#IDComment17710548 Tim, thanks for the good word. This cannot be overstated. So often we are ministry first, family second, our relationship with God third. Our ministry starts with our personal connection to God. Fri, 27 Mar 2009 20:22:25 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/03/the-1-key-ingredient-to-building-relationships-with-teens/#IDComment17710548 http://youthminblog.com/2009/03/presence/#IDComment17593114 Chris . . . you ask a good question. At our youth ministry growth events I will do announcements but almost always ask if there is anything else we should add. I ask them to add anything they did that week they felt great about. I give them permission to brag. I love it now when youth will say I got a "B" on my geometry test and I was pretty happy about that. While this is not the same as going out to be with them it does communicate we care about that stuff too and hopefully they know we cared enough to ask. Occasionally that has opened the door for me to know about an event they would have thought insignificant. The hardest part of being present with the non-performers, non-athletes, etc. is discovering those moments where we could be present. It is difficult enough just to get a sports schedule sometimes. Wed, 25 Mar 2009 21:51:24 +0000 http://youthminblog.com/2009/03/presence/#IDComment17593114