This is neither but a tip I was once given and try to follow is to start the note with the word "You." I always had a tendency to start it with "I" ("I'm so happy you were able to come!") or "Thank you for..." but starting with the focus on the other person will make them feel good!
The Best of Everything by Rona Jaffe. I think I first heard about this book on the Hairpin and I lovvvvveeeee it.
I read that wondering if someone had written in about me too. I will work to change too! Thanks for the encouragement!
Someone once described someone to me as "at least 5'10", and like, probably 150 pounds" and I was sitting there thinking "wow, what a thin person, and smaller than me in every way" when I realized the point she was trying to make was that this person was gigantic. People are so weird, and wrong, and hurtful (although in this case my #1 feeling is still that the speaker was literally bananas)
I think it absolutely means something: it means that this relationship actually meant something to you. I think ultimately that is a good thing even though it hurts so much now. You put yourself out there. You let yourself like or love someone who it didn't work out with. THAT IS A HUGE ACCOMPLISHMENT! Lots of people cannot do that and never do it, and the fact that you have means that you can do it again, when you're ready. And I trust that if you want to do it again, then in due time, you will be ready.
I think there was a YA novel in which a character peed like a banshee!
The summer I was 20, I had an internship in an office 9-5 and then worked a bunch of nights and weekends as a TERRIBLE waitress. I'd drive back to my parents' in my beat-up Volvo smelling like kitchen and if it was really hot sometimes I'd take my work tuxedo shirt off and drive home in my bra. Which felt, at the time, super dirtbaggy.
How do you keep yourself from running? Just reminders? I've run a lot in the past and don't want to anymore. I always confuse "discomfort because you're not familiar with healthy relationships" with "unhappiness" and I'm ready to break the habit.