blushingflower

blushingflower

116p

1,462 comments posted · 5 followers · following 0

7 years ago @ The Toast - An Open Thread, and Se... · 0 replies · +14 points

Calling me a nerd is just a true statement, it's not gonna start a fight.

7 years ago @ The Toast - The Final Link Roundup! · 0 replies · +8 points

Thank you to everyone who made this space what it was. I am sad that it is ending, but I respect the hell out of the decision and the way you shared it with us.

This feels a little bit like college ending: a brief, beautiful time that brought important personal growth and wonderful new people into our lives, and it is sad. But given that I'm still BFFs with people I met in college, I have faith that many of the relationships that were forged here will endure, and even if they don't, the things we learned about the world and about ourselves will always be with us.

Be excellent to each other.

7 years ago @ The Toast - A note on The Toast · 0 replies · +35 points

what is even happening right now

7 years ago @ The Toast - The Final Link Roundup! · 0 replies · +38 points

Shhh, you will blow her mild-mannered cover! They are obviously a family of superheroes.

7 years ago @ The Toast - Hey Ladies: Take it to... · 12 replies · +102 points

okay, BUT Toastie slack is pretty great.

7 years ago @ The Toast - Link Roundup! · 0 replies · +1 points

I haven't, personally, but I have SEVERAL friends who have, and I am pretty sure they would all agree that while the experience itself may not be wonderful, it was worthwhile. (Though at least one was very stubborn about accepting the results as valid, even though I know from personal experience that he does stop breathing during the night). And certainly the people I know who've gotten CPAPs as a result of their sleep studies have seen a significant improvement in the quality of their sleep and thus their overall well being.

7 years ago @ The Toast - Thank You, Toast. · 1 reply · +18 points

Nikki, thank you for being such a wonderful addition to our community. Thank you for your beautiful, thoughtful writing and for being the kind of editor that people want to work with. Thank you for choosing pitches well (and for writing kind rejections).
We are so lucky to have had you and I can't wait to see what you do next (can we preorder your book NOW, or do we have to wait?).

7 years ago @ The Toast - How To Tell If You Are... · 1 reply · +35 points

"You long to go on an adventure, but only so long as the adventure is not in any way uncomfortable or inconvenient."
If only I were not too tall to reasonably pass as a Hobbit.

"Orcs are chasing you, but this does not bother you nearly as much as the inadequate breakfast you had earlier today."

It is really hard to put in a productive day of Orc-fleeing when you haven't had a good breakfast, okay?

"You are a member of a wonderful fellowship of diverse people united by love and loyalty, but soon it must come to an end. And when the world you know begins to fade away, at long last you will go to the shore and board a ship, and take to the Sea."

<3

7 years ago @ The Toast - Link Roundup! · 0 replies · +26 points

You are NOT being unreasonable.
Are there possible innocuous explanations (e.g. he's broke and entertaining you at home is cheaper)? Sure. But are they the most likely? No.
He's ignoring your signals, you said you got a weird vibe from him on your first date, and you don't really sound all that interested in him. If you're the kind of person who takes a while to warm up to new people and you'd like to give him another shot, do it in a public place. If he's worth dating, he'll respect your boundary. If he doesn't respect it, that tells you what you need to know.

In terms of pushing back, you have options. You can play coy, and say "oh, I wouldn't want to put you out! Let's go to [x restaurant]!" (I would choose a relatively casual/inexpensive restaurant, both to manage expectations and in case it is a money thing) Or be direct and say "I really feel more comfortable going out somewhere!"

7 years ago @ The Toast - Link Roundup! · 0 replies · +10 points

I think it depends a lot on what her actual job is and how often the possibility exists that she could make dangerous mistakes with widespread consequences. But it certainly indicates poor judgement and attention to detail, because if you read the instructions/warnings on Drano, how could you ever think it was appropriate to use to clean the basin of a sink? It's not even a cleaning product!