gdp's Comments

AatRB : You're such an authority

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 13:52:06 +0000

Oh, I bet this person is just a joy to be around. Such a positive attitude. So, basically, you're screwed either way. Following the mythical Jewish zombie means your life is difficult, but if you're life isn't then you're gonna pay dearly in the afterlife. Where do I sign up?

AatRB : Good old tolerant Jesus, eh?

Tue, 9 Mar 2010 00:50:20 +0000

Actually, the education part does make since and I'll agree that some private Catholic schools offer top notch education. However, I've seen the severe damage that trying to reconcile religion with sexuality can cause and I just can't see how someone lives with compartmentalizing to two. Maybe it's a projection of my own experiences but I say, "Run...run far, far away".

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Oh good, because that\'s what they\'re missing right now

Wed, 3 Mar 2010 03:47:15 +0000

If the imaginary Jewish zombie wants people to believe in him, maybe he should have used his superpowers to save the 230,000+ people who were killed. Or maybe he could have helped them overcome the devastating poverty that led to poor building practices that contributed to such a high death rate in the first place.

Attempts at Rational Behavior : What if he's a minute late?

Mon, 15 Feb 2010 20:27:44 +0000

In a little known mistranslation of the Book of Mormon, the lost tribe of Israel actually paddled their boats from Israel, across the Atlantic, and landed on the shores of Central America, not North America. "Lamanite" was then a corruption of the Egyptian-based heiroglyphic for "Mayan". Thus, they knew about Jesus' return and ended their calendars appropriately. ;-)

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Yup, it\'s real sad

Mon, 15 Feb 2010 19:04:08 +0000

There's something awfully sad about America. It has a lot to do with Christians and science indeed.

Attempts at Rational Behavior : What if he's a minute late?

Mon, 15 Feb 2010 19:01:10 +0000

Is he going to come back on an hourly basis for each and every time zone or do we have to assume that this is GMT? Whenever he gets here, tell him I'll be under the sink behind the Comet....

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Conspiracy?!?! Oh wait...or just localized vacination programs.

Wed, 10 Feb 2010 16:19:08 +0000

I was delusionally hoping that the whole chemtrail horseshit had been put to rest. Guess not. At one point, my cousins had my dad convinced that chemtrails were real since they believe it themselves. My brother and I had to sit down with him and explain that water is a product of hydrocarbon combustion and that's what produces contrails behind jets. I was working at a mental health hospital once and one of the nurses was convinced that the conspiracy was real. I had to bring an organic chemistry book to work to show her the formula for combustion. She was an RN and had to take basic organic chemistry to get her certification! What is it about conspiracy theories that attract people?

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Isn\'t that the plot for a porno film?

Sat, 6 Feb 2010 02:42:49 +0000

Well, she was the apostle to the apostles...*wink, wink, nudge, nudge* If she was a follower of Jesus and was loved so much by him, how is it that she would mistake him for the gardener? Just because I needed to know, a Google search indeed reveals that there is quite a bit of "Jesus porn" available both gay and straight.

Attempts at Rational Behavior : The Great Disappointment

Sun, 31 Jan 2010 23:14:06 +0000

Stephen Fry is truly inspiring. He's incredibly funny and intelligent. I could sit and listen to him for hours on end.

Attempts at Rational Behavior : You need a lock on your door

Fri, 29 Jan 2010 20:17:38 +0000

That is just creepy. No matter how much I like my family, if they ever tried to pull this one (not that they would), they'd be getting thrown out with the threat of their world ending sooner than they expect.

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Clean your ears and stop being a Christian victim.

Tue, 26 Jan 2010 19:09:34 +0000

Yep, it's a grand conspiracy to lead people away from the "one true word of god". Since other holy books were indeed written by man, but the BuyBull (say it with 4 syllables) is the inspired work of the sky fairy, we work extra hard to discredit it alone. This persecuted Christian complex gets on my last nerve.

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Just buy it, you cheap bastard

Fri, 22 Jan 2010 03:24:54 +0000

I didn't know that B&N had opened a store in Italy... ;-)

Attempts at Rational Behavior : What about the military and the police?

Mon, 18 Jan 2010 20:00:44 +0000

Don't forget the local fire department, roads and highways, and water and sewage treatment.. If they truly are anti-socialism, then each and everyone of them needs to address these items themselves without support from anyone.

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Is this a vocabulary or just an intelligence issue?

Mon, 18 Jan 2010 19:57:23 +0000

So, exactly what do they interpret it to mean? The lack of historical knowledge among the zombie following crowd seems to be increasing exponentially and the vacuum is being filled with their twisted ideas that this country was somehow founded on "biblical principals" and that our forefathers were god fearing Christians. They keep pushing for a theocracy and we will have to keep pushing back.

Attempts at Rational Behavior : This sounds spooky in a Vincent Price voice

Fri, 15 Jan 2010 17:58:24 +0000

Just remember to aim for the head. Also, you may want to review the University of Florida zombie readiness plan if you have co-workers you supect may be zombies - especially of the jeebus-loving kind. http://chalkboard.blogs.gainesville.com/files/200...

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Because prayer is more effective than actions

Fri, 15 Jan 2010 11:43:33 +0000

Prayer is the biggest barrier to change. It removes the onus from someone to make a difference. Instead, they can merely leave it to their imaginary friend(s).

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Good luck with that quest

Thu, 14 Jan 2010 06:14:52 +0000

If the Piggly Wiggly is full of heathens, imagine the IGA or, *dum, dum, dum, dum* Wal-Mart!

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Mmmm...morning sex

Wed, 13 Jan 2010 03:02:32 +0000

I was afraid the Jesus Jackhammer was exactly what I was thinking it was but I Googled it just to make sure. Yep. "Feet first, feet first, not the head, ya' fool."

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Can I get that in a medium?

Sun, 10 Jan 2010 22:34:16 +0000

Zak isn't bad eye candy so make sure the shirt is a size or so too small. Unfortunately, he is irrational enough to believe in woo.

Attempts at Rational Behavior : Thinking of running with scissors again?

Fri, 8 Jan 2010 20:53:00 +0000

Can't...resist...urge...to...remove matress tags...help me Jesus!