As ridiculous as it might sound, despite being black myself I actually feel more comfortable at predominantly white parties than at parties made up of mostly blacks. I have always lived in predominantly white neighborhoods and have gone to predominantly white schools, so growing up from an early age nearly all of my closest friends (except a small few) have been white. My social upbringing plays a large factor into my interests, hobbies, and likes/dislikes in terms of movies/music/etc, so I always gravitate toward people who have very similar tastes as I do. These people usually happen to be white. It is not that I purposefully avoid trying to make friends with other black people. It’s just that I am an incredibly shy person and I usually tend to keep to myself and not talk to anyone because of anxiety. I make friends by having other people approaching me first, discovering that we have the same interests, becoming close, and then being introduced to more of their friends. And once again, these people are usually white. So when discussions come up in lecture about being uncomfortable around large groups of people of another race, I always find myself laughing because it’s not true for me at all.

In terms of parties, it is not as easy for me to say that being at predominantly black parties makes me feel uncomfortable. Because it really depends on the music being played, and whether I know at least a couple other people there. My favorite music genres are indie rock and folk, and those aren’t genres that are popular among blacks. Of course, there are other blacks that do share that interest. Just like there are whites that don’t like those genres, and prefer rap. Music crosses all boundaries. But I am still much more likely to find whites that like that music, than blacks that do. And of all predominantly black parties that I’ve ever been to, that kind of music has never been played. It’s always been rap and hip hop, and because those aren’t genres that I enjoy I end up not having as much fun as others there who do enjoy the music. And this isn’t just black parties, I have also been to a couple predominantly white parties where they’ve only played rap and hip hop and I have still felt out of place. The reason I feel more comfortable attending predominantly white parties is because I know there’s a much greater chance of me finding a lot of people who share many of my interests, which allows me to feel more at ease and sociable. When at parties, it’s not the color of the people’s skin that’s important to me. It’s whether or not I’m actually enjoying myself that matters.

The biggest and most general parallel between the white standard and the male standard is that they both pretty much run the way our society is, and the views and beliefs held by much of our society. This is due largely in part to white males holding a majority of leadership positions across the country; whether they be government positions, positions in big companies, and at institutions of learning. These positions are mostly held by men, and more specifically: men who are white. So it is their values, views, beliefs, etc. that shape our society. This is nothing new, as white men have held leadership positions in this country since before it was even an actual organized nation. That’s not to say that all white men have the same views, or that all white men have the same beliefs as all white men hundreds of years ago, but when there are not many minorities or women helping to make important decisions then you get a lot of people who are being hurt more than they are being helped. Whites and males are both largely represented in the leadership positions of our country, and the way our society is greatly exemplifies that.

Another main parallel between the white standard and the male standard has to do with beauty. In class, we watched a video on an experiment in which black children were given a white doll and a black doll, and then told to pick which one they thought looked better. Most of the children chose the white doll, instead of the black doll which looked more like them. This represents how the ideal of beauty is taught in our society. In media, time after time we see the white standard being a portrayal of ideal beauty: pale skin, long straight hair, light eyes, etc. This is a view that is thrown at us constantly from the time we can barely even begin to talk. And though it’s not entirely purposeful, it still leaves a mark on society and how those who don’t fit into that standard of beauty might see themselves. This is a parallel to the male standard and how men portray beauty, more specifically the beauty of a woman: long hair, thin but with curves, perfect skin/teeth/fashion style, etc. Of course this is a broad generalization, but it is still what we see often in the media as a portrayal of what the ideal female beauty is. And this is a standard set by men, of course women are involved as well but not as much. And like the white standard of beauty, this is another view that leaves a big mark on society and how women view themselves in regards to their beauty.

I think the reason white guys who are interested in dating minority girls don’t approach women of color when sober is mostly because they are probably unsure if the interest of dating outside one’s race is mutual. The society we live in, while very heavily integrated, is still socially segregated on some levels. Looking around campus, I very often see people hanging out with others of the same race as them. So when people grow up mostly just associating with others who are like them, it might be slightly intimidating to step outside that box and interact with others from a different background. White guys who have grown up with little interaction with minority women, probably only feel comfortable approaching these women when drinking at a party because the alcohol helps to ease their nerves.

I think this also has a lot to do with the portrayal of interracial relationships in the media. With the exception of white men with Asian women, very rarely do you see on television or in movies white guys with black/Latina women. It gives off the impression that maybe black and Latina women aren’t interested in dating white guys, so the guys do not try to approach them in real life. The same goes for black and Latina women who do not think white guys are interested in dating them. This lack of representation in the media, as well as a lack of representation in society, seems to make it harder for white guys to approach minority women on the streets, in school, etc. At a party, the high energy atmosphere and large mix of people makes it easier to approach and talk to people one normally wouldn’t.

Also, if a white guy doesn’t have many minority friends, then it might make him a bit nervous to approach a minority female on the streets who he thinks, or knows, doesn’t have many white friends. Then he might be faced with rejection because for all he knows, if she doesn’t have any white friends then that might mean she’s not interested in dating white guys. For example: I’m black and currently dating a white guy who I met through a mutual friend, and he asked me out outside the elements of a party. But I’m pretty much the only minority in my group of friends, and even in my larger social circles there are only three or four other minorities besides me. I think that knowing that a very large majority of my friends are white made it easier for him to approach me because it was more obvious that I had no problems with dating outside of my race. Of course, that’s not to say that minority girls who only have friends the same race as them aren’t interested in interracial dating because most of them probably are, but their interest is probably seen as less clear.

This is a hard topic to come to an absolute conclusion on, because while it is important to try and help others around the world, it is also very important to help out fellow citizens right at home. In my opinion, I think more money should be spent helping the homeless and impoverished right here in America. Because it doesn’t look good if we are giving a lot of our money to others, but our own people are suffering and struggling to survive. It is almost like a mother ignoring her own children’s needs to help and provide for the children of the family net door. Though, it is also important to take into account a point Sam brought up from a lecture a few weeks ago: The poorest people in our country are still better off than the poor of third world countries. With that in mind, it makes things a bit more difficult. But I still believe those in need here should at least get the best help that we can give them before we spend millions of dollars elsewhere.

An exception to this, however, is sending aid in times of emergency. The earthquake in Haiti and the tsunami in Japan were devastating occurrences that no one expected, and they caused so much death and damage that it only seemed right that countries around the world helped to support the two nations in their times of need. In these times of urgency, it is important that all nations that are able to send the money and supplies that can be used to help the safety and survival of the survivors of these tragedies. Otherwise, if there is no state of emergency that needs to be taken care of with our assistance, then an equal number of money should be spent on aid here in the United States and abroad.

And in the case of Native Americans, I think they certainly deserve to receive a sufficient amount of money and support from our government. It was the development of this country that left them in the horrible state they are in now, and I do not think it is fair at all. This was originally their land that we now live on, so I think it is disgusting how it seems they have been left to die off with almost no care at all from our government. It certainly sends off a bad message about our country if we cannot take care of our own people, and especially if we do nothing to help the descendants of those we stole this land from. There are many issues in the United State that need a lot more attention and money spent on developing ways to fix them.

The way I see it, inequality has to do more with how one group of people is treated differently from another; unfairness is when an individual is treated differently from another individual. So, I think inequality is unfairness on a larger scale. Not letting black and brown people do the same high paying jobs as whites is inequality, because the groups are getting experiences that are not on an equal level with the other. On the other hand: if Person A and Person B are both equally qualified for the same job they’re applying for, and Person B does not get the job only because Person A happens to have the same dog as the interviewer, then that’s unfair. Because that decision was based on something specific to that one person. When I think of unfair, I think of children bickering over who gets the last popsicle in the freezer before a parent gives it to one child and the other goes off to throw a tantrum shouting about how unfair it is. When I think of inequality, I think of the Civil Rights Movement and all those people who fought to have the same equal rights as whites in this country.

In response to the end of the question, with the example of the different heights, I once saw a newspaper cartoon that illustrated the differences of equality for a conservative and a liberal but the same concept can be used here. Say you have three people of three different heights, and like in the video: Tall is white, medium is Asian, and short is blacks/Native Americans. Take these three people and take them to a baseball game, but the thing is that they have to watch from behind a wall; only the tallest person can see the game from over the wall. This is inequality represented in a simple way. To make things equal, you give the other two who can’t see enough boxes for them to stand on (according to their height) so that they are also able to see the game. This way, all three have an equal advantage of watching the game. But only like this. If you were to give everyone one box, then the tallest person would be even higher above the wall, the medium height person would just be barely able to see over the wall, and the shortest would still be blocked from the view. In order to make things equal, each person must receive just enough to help them catch up to the others based on their situation. Some may say this is unfair, but I don’t see how one can look around them, see how much struggling others have to go through to have even a chance at the same opportunity, and complain.

I think it is kind of sad that we live in a society where women feel embarrassed, or told to feel embarrassed, to openly state that they are menstruating. It is a completely natural thing, and nearly all women experience it or have experienced it. And as Sam mentioned in class, none of us would be here if our mothers did not menstruate. But that just goes to show that we live in a world dominated by men. Because of how our society caters more to men, “girl problems” become taboo subjects that women are told not to talk about openly. And it is not only the topic of periods that are treated this way, it is also the subject of female masturbation. To me, it seems as though guys masturbating is an okay thing to do and perfectly normal. But for some reason female masturbation is some kind of big deal that girls are shamed into not admitting. So there is definitely a difference in how open guys are allowed to be about their bodies versus how open women can be.

However, Sam also mentioned how things would probably be different in society if we lived in a society dominated by women. A society where women on their periods are treated with the same tenderness and care as a pregnant woman is treated in society today. Though I can’t say for sure that I would want everyone to go out of their way to accommodate me just because I am menstruating, but it would be nice for their to be some changes toward how the subject is treated. For example, guys joking about how girls are probably being “bitchy” or “overemotional” because they’re on their period. I have never found that to be funny, just annoying. And I think that in a society led by women, men would not use menstruation as a means to make women feel weak.

Much of how women and women’s issues are treated has to do with the fact that our society is dominated by the male perspective. Because of this, women have less freedom to openly discuss the things that trouble us. No matter how natural and common they may be. Hopefully we will be able to change how our society approaches such issues, but I don’t expect that to happen anytime soon. Especially since we are still facing the problem of people not wanting to give women the choice of what to do with their own bodies, in cases such as abortion and pregnancy. And many of those who try to mandate such issues are men, which is ridiculous considering they don’t have any idea what women have to deal with regarding their bodies.

I definitely think that the light skin vs. dark skin debate in the black community definitely goes back to the days of slavery. If a slave was of a lighter complexion, they were usually made a house slave as they were seen as being more acceptable to serve the master’s guests in the house. The slaves of darker complexion worked out in the fields and did more of the dirty work. A lighter complexion meant the slave looked a bit more like white people, and that made them fit to be housemaids and servants. And by doing this, we see that the lighter skinned slaves were given a bit of favor over those with darker skin. I have read different information of really light skinned blacks being able to pass off as white, which gave them opportunities darker skinned blacks did not have. It was all absolutely horrible, of course, but it shows how deeply rooted this problem in the black community is.

This problem has changed in current society. Instead of lighter skin being a way to escape some of the problems faced by blacks during slavery, it is now seen by many blacks as an ideal beauty feature. In many different areas of entertainment such as music, television, movies, etc., lighter skinned blacks (especially women) seem to be the preference. And instead of this preference being made from those outside the black community, it is one that is made amongst blacks. There have been many times on the internet in which I have read someone’s opinion on how darker skinned blacks are not attractive. And the saddest part is that the people voicing that opinion are usually black themselves. It is a very bizarre thing to take notice of. But it is not surprising when we look at the problem of a lighter skin preference being a worldwide issue. We talked about skin whitening creams in class, and I have certainly heard about many blacks bleaching their own skin so it becomes much lighter.

Just like many issues regarding race today, this problem is definitely not anything new and can be traced back hundreds of years. Having lighter skin meant looking more like the master, a person of power and much higher societal status. Of course, these days “looking like the master” is not why light skin is popular in the black community, but it certainly helped to start it. Also, darker skin is seen as negative because of connotations of being evil or bad. In class, one girl stated how her father did not like how she dated darker skinned black guys. And my guess is that it is because black guys with dark skin are given a bad reputation right from their birth. They are seen as criminals, and people who will not do much with their lives. It is a disgusting view, but I certainly think it is something that needs to change right away.

If I were to wake up tomorrow and discover that God does not exist, how I live my life would not change. I do consider myself Christian, and I do believe in God, but my life is not centered around the religion or its teachings. I definitely consider myself a spiritual person rather than religious, and I do not attend church on my own will. I do however believe that God started the process of evolution, and many of my other beliefs are also a mix of religious and scientific. But I still do not think that the realization of there being no God would alter my life all that much. It would affect me a bit, of course. For most of my life I have been struggling with what to believe and wondering about the existence of there being such a being as God. So, to learn that it is absolutely guaranteed that such an existence is false would certainly jar me a bit.

However, overall I would still live my life in a very similar way. I would still do the morally right things, although I no longer have to fear God’s judgment. And I would still highly appreciate nature and the beauty in the world around us even without having to think of it as works of God. While I believe in God, I can say that all of my decisions in life have been made without taking into consideration whether or not they are right in God’s eyes. So if I were to learn that God does not exist after all, I would just continue to make the same decisions. I can see how the discovery of there being no God would very heavily alter the lives of people all across the world, as looking to God helps many get through life and struggles. So to have no God to look to, they would lose faith in life and not know exactly how to continue without such an important part of their life.

Many people use God as a reason to be a good person. If they are morally just and right and do good things throughout their life, then they have a better chance of getting into Heaven. But I do not think that’s right. People should do good no matter what. God or no God. If I discover that God absolutely does not exist, that would not stop me from being a good person and helping others. And I sincerely hope that that would not stop others from being good people, either. Also, I do believe that the confirmation of there being no God would solve a lot of political debates in which people use religion as a reason to be against something. And my hope would be that it would make it a lot easier for people to come to agreements on changes that should be made in our nation.

While I have certainly never considered myself as being “rich” before, I completely understood what Sam was saying in class about all of us in that room being in the top five percent of wealth in the world. Because I can only get a firsthand view of what is directly around me, of course I am going to compare myself with those right around me and think that I have a much lower amount of wealth than some of my fellow classmates. But because of that, it is so easy to forget just how much suffering is going on in the rest of the world. Growing up, my family had many times when we had to be tight with our money for certain amounts of time. Still, my parents were always able to buy my brothers and I toys, gadgets, and other things that were unnecessary to our survival. Comparing that to children in third world countries whose families can’t even afford clothes, water, food, etc., it is so easy to see how rich I truly am. Being able to have a roof over my head my whole life; having closets full of clothes and the ability to buy more; being able to buy whatever food I want whenever—these are things I take for granted so often, and it is really unfortunate that I do not treasure these privileges as highly as I should.

Just by living in America, I have been given much more privilege than many poor people in other countries will ever have. Even the homeless in America could be considered to have some wealth because this country has many resources, as was stated in class, to help them out and make sure they get a meal and place to get out of the cold when it becomes dangerous to one’s health. Meanwhile, there are countries that really cannot afford to help its homeless in such a way. It is true that there are those in this country that struggle financially, but those struggles are almost nothing compared to the struggles of those in third world countries. I think we all tend to forget that. And thinking about it now, I feel that I should no longer take what I have for granted. Especially the very simple things that I overlook all the time. I feel truly blessed that I was born into a life where I do not have to watch my younger siblings die from starvation because my parents have absolutely no way of getting money. That is a reality for way too many children, and it’s about time I see it as a reality and not just some thirty second television commercial starring some celebrity.

If I knew my child was gay, I would not tell them. At least not at a very young age. A person’s sexuality is a big part of their identity, so I would not want to force them into making important decisions so early in their life. I think it is important for children to not be forced into roles so early on in life. Instead I believe that they should be left to figure out things about themselves on their own. Guidance from parents is good, of course, but not if misguides a child away from who they truly are. I would never sit down with my child (if they were under the age of sixteen or so) and flat out tell them that they are in fact homosexual. If they ever have any questions, then I would want them to feel comfortable enough to ask me. Then I would give them an answer, but only if they were to approach me first. Of course, if things get really troublesome and they are worried about why they feel so different from everyone else- then I would have a talk with them. If my child were so confused and unsure of themselves that they were holding all their problems in and truly struggling in life, I would make sure to start having a series of discussions with them. This would be to help them understand some of the feelings they may be having trouble with, and to help them feel that they do not have to struggle by themselves.

Also, if I had a feeling that my child was gay but not absolutely sure of it, then I would make sure there were no barriers to keep them from going where they would naturally go in life. If I had a boy that at a young age became interested in toys and clothes that are usually meant for girls, then I would still buy him those things. Even if I was unsure whether he was gay or just going through a phase or whatever, I would let him go with what felt right to him. Limiting a child from things because it is not “right for their gender” just ends up limiting a child’s identity. And I would never want to purposefully deny my child what makes them feel comfortable in their skin. Giving a child a wide variety of options is a great way to help them figure out on their own what is right for them and who they are. Though it is certainly a major leap over the barriers set up in society about what is specifically for girls and what is specifically for boys. So, while I would not come straight out and tell my child that they are homosexual, I would subtly let them know that there is nothing wrong with that way of life. And when the time ever comes, I would hope that they feel absolutely comfortable in coming out to me.