Sam's half term (and a bit) report:
Got some organisation and discipline into the club - good
3rd in the table - pretty good
Entertainment factor - very poor
Reasons given for not winning - absolutely pathetic
Tactical nous - none.

There was something in that song about "Eight miles high and falling fast......". That's the ball I reckon.

Roshi, I think that, for reasons I cannot posibly even try to fathom, Sam has pulled the wool over so many peoples eyes over so many years.
Remember that he was in the frame for the England job not so long ago! How did he get that far (and how did he fit into the frame?)? This alone probably says so much about English football and why we have achieved diddly squat for more than 40 years.
Apart from a promotion (maybe 2) Sam has won nothing and has continued to play the same dinosaur football through a career that has made him a pretty wealthy man.
Some managers get one chance and are then discarded (often prematurely) whilst others seem to keep getting jobs and have reputations that belies their lack of achievement.

In an exclusive interview, Sam Allardyce (affectionately known the world over as "Big Sam") responds to some of the crticism he has been receiving about his style of play and his team's results.
Q: Sam, there has been criticism from some West Ham fans about the style of play you use. They would like to see the ball played on the floor and the amount of long balls reduced. What do you say to that?
SA: They know booger all about football. Just because they have been watching the game for up to 50 years and, in some cases, played when they were younger, it doesn't mean they understand owt. They don't bother me at all because I am right and I am better than them.
Q: What about the overuse of the long ball?
SA: I'm reet fed up of answering this one. As a genius I know best. You have to be able to give it a big boot. That's quality football that is. Have you watched that Barcelona? Boring as buggery. They wouldn't last 10 minutes in a real man's game.
Q: There has been criticism of you playing players out of position. How do you respond to that?
SA: Again, these people know nowt and I know everything. Positions mean nowt. If a bloke at the back gives it enough height the blokes at the front have plenty of time to run about and get under the ball when it drops. So positions mean nowt.
Q: In the Middlesboro match you failed, again, to hold onto a lead and there have been questions about your substitutions.
SA: We did not fail to keep the lead. The fans did that. It was nowt to do with me cos I am right and it was only my tactical genius that ensured we got a good result and were not beaten. Bringing on John Carew was an example of how good I am. We had Carlton Cole, a big lump, playing up front, but Carew is a bigger lump so you have to use him. The bigger the lump, the better the player. I'm hoping to sign that Zigic from Birmingham cos he's even bigger.
Q: Will you get automatic promotion?
SA: I will. Don't know if the team will. The fans will probably cock it up though.
Q: If you do get back to the Premier League, how do you think you will compare to managers like Ferguson, Wenger, Mancini, even Brendan Rogers or Paul Lambert?
SA: I'm better than all of them. I'm a reet modern manager, me. I've got one of them things in my ear and everything.
Q: Thanks Sam.
SA: You're welcome. But remember, you know nowt about nowt and I do.

Another frustrating evening. Poor set up of the team, lack of width and pace, inability - again - to defend a lead.
The problem is not our midfield or our strikers, it's the whole front 6. The shape is wrong and the selection is wrong. Examples? Tomkins is not a midfielder and Maynard is not a wide player.
Green had almost nothing to do and the back four did Ok with Faye the pick of the bunch. Nolan was anonymous and Tomkins looked exactly what he is - a centre half playing out of position. Noble's passing left a lot to be desired at times but at least he kept looking for the ball and put in lots of effort. The players around him made it very difficult for him.
Maynard looked lost on the right and Taylor almost the same on the left. Cole was left isolated and had to deal with appalling service. Our inability to get to the byline and put crosses in instead of hoofing diagonal balls into the box was why we created very little chances.
The substitutions were puzzling. Collison is so out of form at the moment that it was unlikely he would change anything positively - particularly wide right - and Carew jumps even less than Cole.
I don't understand why more use is not made of Baldock and Landsbury and, surely, at some point, Morrison must be given a go.
I've just watched Allardyce's post match interview and it was bitchy and childish. Doesn't he understand that we watch the game, we saw what happened and no amount of flannel from him can change what we saw?

For some bizarre reason I think he will go 4-4-2 tonight with a midfield of O'Neill, Nolan, Noble and Taylor plus Cole and Baldock / Maynard up front.
Personally I think he needs to make more of Lansbury and give Morrison a go.

Mine or Aussies?

But is it really football??

I think he only (only!) got about £30m from the sale. Still, that would leave him £5m to buy more caravans.

I think Allardyce is making this far worse than it is and his comments are not going to help the players one little bit. And he's not exactly endearing himself to the supporters either.