Brynalyn,

Rather than shoot messages back & forth if I may, I would
like to share where I am coming from so you might
understand. One of the areas of study I have spent allot of
thought & time in while doing ministry & working on my
Masters degree is sexuality inside of Christian circles.
There is a rather Augustinian view in the church that sex,
sexuality is evil, dangerous, ungodly, etc. We spend years
telling kids, especially girls no, no, no, wrong, wrong,
wrong. Then when they go out in the world, date, get
married they have all sorts of issues. I watched the kids
at the Bible College & Seminaries I attended who had been
sheltered by mom & dad, never really been away from home &
taught how to deal with life struggle with all sorts of
issues. As I had put in my comment a prof of mine who had
moved out to Moody Bible Institute in Chicago did a study on
Seminaries & found that the ones with the most
repressive/strick rules regarding dating (pink & blue
sidewalks in some cases) had the highest divorce &
seperation rates among their alumni. Christians in general
lack a healthy view of sex & sexuality but even more lack a
godly view. Jewish theology has the notation that a man &
woman are the closest to God when they are joined as one
flesh! One of the ways I see that unhealth & ungodly view
demonstrated often is in insecure & controlling behaviour on
the part of women. When a married cpl fulfill their roles,
calling, giftedness & responsiblities as designed by God
"all things work for the good..." When they don't things
are out of balance. Paul talks about somethings be
acceptable to some peolpe & not to others. The idea of
sensativity with our freedom for the sake of not causing a
brother or sister to stumble. If a husband bought or
received the SI issue & it made his wife upset or insecure
then they need to talk that out & decide TOGETHER what the
appropriate response is. But if she decides on her own &
throws it out...is upset, witdraws her afffection, becomes
angry with her husband & doesn't communicate her feelings
then not only is that controlling behaviour but intimacey is
broken between her & her husband. Allot of the strong
feelings that woman have regarding their own sexuality &
self image are the result of mixed messages from the church
& from culture. That no, no, no, wrong, wrong, wrong
message from the church coupled with the "you have the right
to..." message our culture puts out & the ever changing
definition of what a man & woman are the raw definition of
conflict. Then to put it bluntly the fact that I see allot
of women in the church that just don't take care of
themselves, well think you see where i am going. On the
side of the men I don't see them often knowing how to really
connect with their wives. At times men do pick up the Si
issue because there are intimacey issues with their wife.

Anyway, I could go on & on but I hope this hepled. I am
sorry too if there was an edge to my comments.

John
----- Original Message Follows -----
From: IntenseDebate Notifications
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To: "Maxaipa777" <maxaipa@mnsi.net>
Subject: Brynalyn replied to your comment on Throwing Away
the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue
Date: Thu, 11 Feb 2010 19:52:06 +0000 (UTC)

IntenseDebate Notification
Brynalyn replied to your comment on Throwing Away
the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue / Stuff Christians
Like - Jon Acuff:

I apologize if I can across as riled.
I was responding to you and providing an argument against
your conclusion that feeling happy that your husband opted
out of the swimsuit issue was related to insecurity about
your personal appearance.

Go to comment

In reply to your comment:
The comments were directed to her not you. The
fact that you appear so rilled by them makes a person
wonder why u are so defensive?

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----- Original Message Follows -----

Millennials fixated on themselves and their needs shouldn’t be a surprise. Never have we had a more egocentric, self-absorbed generation believing the sun sets and rises on their felt needs and opinions. Yes they are abandoning the church and for a good part because many churches focus on the demographic most prevalent in their congregation, seniors! The people group that is getting larger, lasting longer and has disposable income that they “can’t take with them” and the local church is hoping to get a piece of. Church services, programs as well as the control and leadership including what is preached is tailored to the seniors. However, despite the home church movement, many of these disenfranchised Millennials are abandoning an evangelical faith for a more spiritual, self-determined and relativistic set of beliefs. Whether Millennials are churched or unchurched, in-general they have similar out-looks and expectations of life. If we want to make an impact on Millennials perhaps we stop being so fixated on them as if they determine the fate of the church, and have churches teach/model through to ALL people some authentic, NON self-serving Christianity which all real believers know is what makes the difference!

Having been in this very situation on more then one occasion I completely understand the tensions and frustration of balancing effort, resources and time. Setting up a program, gathering resources, spending time and money and putting in the effort only to see a minimal response can be frustrating. I agree we only have so much in the way of time and money and that apparent failures can discourage the morale of people. However, the measure of success needs to be qualified and matched to the efforts applied. Do we measure success only by numbers of people that respond? As well we can talk about non negotiables like doctrine but there are many things we need as growing Christians that we don't like. Everyone knows exercise is essential for health and growth (be that spiritual or physical) but look at all the spiritually and physically fat out of shape people there are in the body! Having said all that, a lot of these issues are perspective in nature. If a church has a congregation of mostly seniors and agrees they need to reach out to younger people some may argue that is a lot of hard work and wont see big results for a while. Others may agree and understand that seniors pass on and be thinking about the future.

How blessed we are that the transcendent breaks through into this world full of sin and filth and becomes imminent and real for us.

I agree on both points! Not only has a Christmas day service been abandoned by most but it is a struggle to get people and families out on Christmas Eve as well. Most folks will say they are too busy Christmas Eve with Christmas Day preparations or have family plans. It never ceases to amaze me even though it is stressed over and over in Advent services and devotions that "Jesus is the reason for the season" we make so little time for him Christmas Eve and day. This stresses the difference in the generational Christmas stories in the previous blog . One includes Jesus as the reason for the season while the other stresses ourselves and family as the focus.

That kind of a revolution begins in the heart and works its way out into the world much like a ripple in the pond after the stone has been thrown. However, I believe just as God works stratigically in our hearts and the world, as does the devil so must we. The ripples affect, before we throw the stones we need to prayerfully and strategically be aware of those ripples outwards effects. Once Apartheid was disolved the worst civil war/blood fued in South Africa's history occured between the Tutsi's and Hutu's because the ripples of unstable government and newness off freedom were not measured. Was that part of God's Kingdom coming? Once the iron curtain feel in Russia and churches were again opened and worshipers not dragged into the street did anyone measure the ripples of the onslaught of conartists and cults that would flock there to abuse and take advantage? Was that part of God's Kingdom coming to fruition as well?

The constant obession with documenting every regular and mondane activity of a persons life or worse their pet through pictures and commentary seems to be our cultures compulsion. I often wonder how much real relationship, productive work time and prayer are being neglected because every fifteen minutes of the day a facebook page, BBM profile or text profile is being updated? it seems the easier it is electronically to connect, the less we have real relationship with each other and the more our facination with ourselves grows.

When I was a young boy I remember watching "The Hiding Place" movie and being struck by the terrible suffering Corrie endured because she and her family did what was right in the sight of God. Reading this today I am ashamed of myself for the trivial things that I worry about this holiday season, gifts, extra lights to decorate the house, loss of a job, etc. This story reminds me of what the season is supposed to be about, sacrifice. Jesus sacrificed his comfortable place at the right hand of his father to come to earth and endure, suffer and die for us. He sacrificed all and we complain and worry when we are inconvenienced by life in the slightest.

I agree with the outlined practices. In regards to the pastor’s salary, pastors should be receiving a salary that is based on the average member’s salary. Unfortunately most pastors are over worked and under paid. Attitudes towards money seem to always take an exceptional slant when it comes to pastoral staff as allot of churches see the pastor as the employee and the board or church as the bosses

Perhaps if the leaders and recognizable figures from that movement had practiced what they preached their efforts and they themselves woul dof had some credibility and more of a positive impact.