This letter was much tougher to read than the ones in the past solely for how truly depressing and hopeless it is. If this makes sense this letter is how I expected all the rest of the letters to be to find one that actually fulfills my expectations is a little weird at this point. Thus far all the letters we’ve read have no always been positive but show glimpses of hope and talk of all the positive things learned thus far and all the things that there are still to learn. Additionally they speak of their situation as one of the most positive and freeing experiences of their life. They speak of how prison saved their life because if they weren’t in there they would have been dead by now. They speak of how the imprisonment of the body released their minds to new heights of understanding and mental freedom to see the world for how it is.
This letter takes the opposite stance. This inmate discusses the hopeless of his situation and instead of how it teaches or forces him to reflect it is a tortuous physical and mental freedom. His spare time is not spent being productive but thinking of how his situation his something that he will never escape and all time is spent staying busy for the sake of being busy because he is afraid of being alone with his thoughts. When I hear bout people in prison like this I feel kind of bad because in this situation prison is not serving as a correctional facility but rather as a torture chamber that is almost inescapable at all turns. He states “I want to pluck out my eyes so not to see what little my life has been reduced to. Such a meaningless existence.” To want to remove your eyes just to not see what your life has been reduced to is something I can’t imagine and would not wish on anyone. Above all though something that hurts my heart to read was this “If prison has taken anything away from me it is the chance to love and to be loved. To look across the crowded room and find the person who is my world looking at me the person who is their’s.” I hurts to see that what he wants is to love and be loved by someone unconditionally. After all at the end of the day even the most hardened criminal just wants to be loves. He ends the letter with “I will never know love.” I feel bad for this man and wish him all the best because without love it is close to impossible to see life as anything but meaningless.

I don’t think that is a question that can ever really answer fully. If I think back to when I was a kid in elementary school and we all played the telephone game we would send a basic simple phrase through about twenty people and by the end of the verbal transactions we would have a phrase nowhere close to what we began with but not only that its also always nonsensical. Now the question becomes where did it go wrong or who’s fault was it? Did someone not speak clearly and fail to annunciate or did someone fail to listen and therefore just repeat what they thought they heard. Now for a larger scale story such as the one presented in class if there was no hope for a very basic and minor phrase to not be butchered then there was absolutely no chance for the story of that length and detail to not be destroyed.
Sharing a story is different from telephone in that it is not just a transfer of words but rather an independent interpretation of ideas and thoughts. In my opinion the story was messed up by the first girl who was intended to share it. Instead of telling the story verbatim she decided to add her own twist to things and in effect take out very crucial pieces of the story. For instance the part about the racial slur something to the effect of “you niggers should leave” is a crucial part of the story because that is the rising actions and clearly states the blatantly obvious racial tensions without that part it deteriorated into what we say which was essentially “There were some black kids and some white kids. They both wanted a room. Then a white kid said something to a black kid. And there was someone named Bill somewhere in the story.” That by no means represents the story accurately. To be completely fair though and remove blame from the first girl since that is not really what the question is about I will propose another few ideas as an explanation of why the story came out the ay it did.
Perhaps gender roles came into play and that is why the story became more and more condensed as it went along. Women, with all due respect, tend to be more long winded and have more to say so if the story were to be passed through all girls then perhaps it would have been able to maintain more of its initial integrity. Next guys tend to speak as little as possible when it comes to certain issues so they took what they thought were the important points and then passed those on to the next person as opposed to everything then the person before shared.

This letter didn’t really move me like all the others in the past have but I guess that wasn’t really the point. To be honest I can’t really say how I would react to being in the same class as convicted felons. I don’t know the extent of the crimes that these men have committed but it would still be unnerving. I want to be bold and brave and say that it would not faze me at all and claim that I would embrace the experience but I cant honestly say I could. The funny think about this is that this is coming from the same guy who always thinks that some really great men are locked up for no reason. Well. Not for no reason but from what I understand prison is a correctional facility and these men have some really insightful things to say at times much more intelligent or peaceful than a lot of “world leaders” who commit mass genocides and wars that are deemed constitutional or legal under the pretenses of protecting and serving. Yet the hypocrisy is that a man protecting his girlfriend can get life in prison yet if he went through the army and killed hundreds of “insurgents” still not really completely sure what those are who are thousands of miles away and pose no immediate direct threat to his family, he is a hero. Go figure.
The most important thing I think that should be taken from this letter is that you should never ever let someone else label you. Once you are labeled there really is no escaping it and even if you do it is very, very difficult. I believe very much so about the self-fulfilling prophesies. If instead of a person an inmate is referred as a convict or by just a number that plays a huge role in dehumanization and a lost of a sense of self. When this happens a separation from your personal identity occurs and that is when people begin to commit violent crimes and behave in aggressive manners. You should always remain true to yourself and create the image you want others to see from you not the image they assign to you.

The question “Do you think you would actively try to not benefit from nepotism if the situation presented itself?” This is one of those loaded question that Sam always talks about. For instance in our Soc 001 class he posed the question “who in here is the douchebag roommate?” Not one person raised their hand except for one kid who though he was cool. The point that Sam was trying to illustrate is that all people have this belief that it could never ever possibly be them that is the bad guy or the recipient of something they did not deserve.
To answer this question I no, no I do not think that I would actively try to not benefit from nepotism. If I am the recipient of nepotism as I was when I got a cardiology medical internship at Mt. Sinai through my mom the way I make up for my guilt is by working as hard as I can and learning as much as I possibly can so that it is not a waste for myself and I am not totally spitting in the face of the other person who may have had the same opportunity as me.
Just to play devil’s advocate for a minute here though if we were to go by what Sam said in terms of if nepotism wasn’t in play the he said that there would always be another candidate that was smarter, more capable, and better suited for the job that would perpetually mean that none of us would ever get employment in which case nepotism would be our only chance. I think that even if a person did have the will a drive to genuinely want to avoid all nepotism and begin a path to gaining things of all their own merit I feel like nepotism is such an engrained part of this society. For instance if we excluded nepotism from the job place than that would mean that a doctor who’s child was let’s say just shot would have to wait the same amount of time for surgery to be performed as a regular person, and that would never happen. Is nepotism bad in that case? Another example would be if a robber or murder were to take place at a police officer’s house chances are first there would be a much more prompt response to the situation and I think it would also be fair to say that there would be a much larger response meaning that more effort would be put fourth to finding the attacker and making sure that this person came to justice. Ultimately this would be for a good cause however the fact that it wouldn’t be an equal effort Overall I don’t think nepotism is that bad we cant regulate it so we might as well embrace it.

Every week I read a new post by one of these inmates I think they are in some sort of competition to one up the one from last week. Of all the books and lectures I’ve heard on interpersonal relationships between men and women this is one I would say is the most beautiful Ive read. To be honest I’ll go as far as to say I don’t think that a woman could have written a better description as to what she would like or what the ideal partner would look like. I really like this because for the other soc class I wrote a blog to answer the question “What would ex be called in a woman centered world?” He answered it better than I ever could. He says “He is a lover. A man should do the best to satisfy his woman’s every desire. Who can take her to another galaxy with his touch. Whose embrace would cause volcanic like eruptions throughout her body. Who could take her to her peak and bring her down slowly and easy. Who can turn her on with his words. Whose presence is yearned for. Whose not ashamed of “just holding” her in his arms.” Not a fuck buddy, but a lover.
Guys talk so much trash about girls saying that they are all gold diggers or joke that all a woman is good for is making sandwiches. All gold diggers are, are women who gave up on love because of the treatment they received from men. Can you blame them for wanting compensation from the very source of their pain and agony? I sure cant. Guys call women useless yet we don’t allow them to flourish and show us what they are capable of. Women are responsible for so much of the beauty in this at times very bleak world and maybe if we let them have more of a say it in there would be little less sadness and a little more love.
This guy has the right idea and no matter what his position I will follow his words and will not allow myself to fall into the category of those who forgot to believe in love and trust someone that could mean the world to them until its too late.

Ah this is a great question. First things first I believe that even before the words used to describe sex changed I believe the whole face of the game would change. I would like to say that the male cliché of guy going to get “some” is true. I personally have heard guys even some of my friends say things along the lines of “Yo I’m trying to get in some butt tonight.” I’ve even over heard a lot of guys say things that are so, so vulgar and disrespectful. Beyond that I hear guys talking of their sexual exploits in ways that must only mean that they were out to satisfy themselves. Or most of the time I hear how they did something monumentally disrespectful and thought it was funny or an act of domination. For example “She was giving me head and I didn’t tell her I was going to cum and I busted all over her face” then follows the laughter. But then I realize, that shit isn’t funny. I feel that head is an act of love or at the very least if not love an act of respect and trust. Girls giving that receive no pleasure from the act so that means they are doing it to try to please their partner so for me to hear that they ejaculated in their face and though it was funny kind of pisses me off. I’ve never once heard a guy say Im going to find a girl and make sweet sweet love to her tonight , it just doesn’t happy.
If sex were the way women wanted it to be then shit to be honest I feel like pornography would be legal and shunned upon but instead looked at as an act of love and beauty after all that is the intention of sex and love. Instead terms to describe the act of sex are “bang” meaning slam: strike violently, screw, “penetrate” meaning pass into or through, often by overcoming resistance which sounds a lot like rape to me or at the very least not being gentle, pounding meaning repeated heavy blows. A lot of males unfortunately learn their perception of sex from porn which in this male centered world is quite violent with a lot of disrespect whether is it spitting on hitting or curing out the women that they are having intercourse with.
I believe that if woman had the choice as to what sex would be called it would be called something along the lines of love making or some gentle, soft, non aggressive description. Maybe it would be called the physical manifestation of feelings. Who knows? What I can tell you is that it would definitely be something more loving.

Of all the letters I’ve read it’s weird for some reason I feel that this guy was one of the easiest people to connect to and additionally after reading this letter I feel in a sense I know him, at least decently. Aside from the description that he gave us I feel he is a very simple, quite and mild mannered young man. I do truly believe that he is a good person, after all he must to be to still have the love and support of so many for so long now. He is right for the most part we view prison as riddled with tatted vicious and violent offenders which does hold some truth to it however there are some exceptions to the rule that he enlightens us about. We do in fact love to condemn prisoners for a crime or a mistake they made when we make terribly stupid mistakes all the time that could land us in prison the only difference is that we’ve been lucky enough to not get caught.
This is going to sound bad but in a sense I can really relate to most of what he is saying at least in the isolation aspect. He and I are both not from Pennsylvania and as a result I don’t see my family very often, in fact only for breaks. My interactions with my family are limited to phone calls once or twice a week. When we do speak I feel like we get into a lot of frivolous arguments over nothing based off misunderstanding. They don’t understand my experience with college thus far and thereby make and stick to their own assumptions of my situation. Conversely I don’t understand their situation I guess either. It really is true, when you’re away life doesn’t stop moving. The other day I was at my desk and I got a call from my mom telling me my aunt died. I didn’t know how to take this. I spoke to her a couple of months ago and she sounds fine, we ended with “I’ll see you soon.” I wont see her again. Life is very precious and can be stripped at any moment so I really do understand where he and all men like him are coming from when they try to share their gospel to people to take things for granted.

Coming from New York one of the most diverse places no less, cities in the nation two people speaking a language I don’t understand in front of me is a common occurrence. The beauty about the city is that depending upon the part you are in you experience different types of languages being spoken. For instance if you are in flushing queens ninety percent of the time you will often witness Korean being spoken. If you were in the Bronx or the upper west side there will probably be a predominance of Spanish speaking people present. The funny thing is that as we discussed in class if you ask the majority of people what the most American or official language of the united states is people will generally say English. However, the beauty of New York City is that the “national” or “predominant” language can and will change depending on who you ask and where you are. The language of that area can span for miles or change within a one black radius.
Personally I love it when two people speak a different language in front of me. In my mind, I like to look at it as a test. To see laughter and or an argument in another language is like putting together the pieces of a puzzle. I watch intently the lips of the two parties and try to dissect their hand movement and the intensity of their facial expressions to see who has a one up or which way the conversation will swing. Additionally, as far as languages go I think English is one of the most boring and unentertaining languages. When people speak quickly and expressively in Spanish, Italian, or Arabic I think that’s one of the most beautiful things one can witness. I think that’s how language barriers are transcended. You don’t know what the person is saying but you could just listen to them talk forever about whatever they’re saying.
The one downside I will say is that people do abuse the secrecy and beauty of this exchange. My ex was from Spain as such she was more than fluent in Spanish however she looked white after all she was being that Spain is a European country. Often times she would tell me of her experiences on the train. She would taken the A train from her mexian and west Indian neighborhood in ozone park queens. She would tell me of the derogatory and sometimes dirty things that guys or construction workers on the way to work would say in Spanish which she fully understood. The other side of it was she would make fun of me in Spanish with out other Spanish speaking friend and there wasn’t anything I could do about it. But for the most part I think it’s a great thing.

Personally when it comes to love or relationships I learned to let nothing stand in your way as cliché as that sounds. It doesn’t make sense to me that one would pass up a number of suitable companions for someone less compatible simply because they are of the same race you are cutting yourself and your possible partner short with your shame and cowardice. Aside from my personal opinions I think there a few factors that make it difficult to date outside the race.
The first and I think most legitimate one would have to be religion in my estimation. For a lot of people religion plays a massive role in who they marry. Some people are in arranged marriage which automatically eliminates any possibility of choosing anyone for yourself no less someone out of your religion or ethnicity. Often times religion and ethnicity go hand in hand so if you are religiously tied that you cant marry someone outside of your ethnicity.
The second thing I think is very basic. I don’t know if it is necessarily shame or the whole thing Sam about saying not wanted to be bothered. I know a lot of people when considering someone of a different ethnicity often times think “What would I look like bringing this person home?” Or “What would my parents or family say if I brought this guy or girl home?” In the case that Sam brought up today with an interracial couple walking down the street do you really want to be called a “sell out” by people of your own community or have to bother with being heckled left and right. This reminds me of the example of Sam gave of a couple adopting a kid outside their race. Most people would but they don’t want to be bothered with all the looks, comments, and questions they would face on a regular basis. Based off that a lot of people feel it’s not worth it.
According to a new UC Berkeley study of 1million online daters, cyberspace is just as segregated as the real world. When it comes to dating online, whites prefer whites, research reveals. More than 80percent of whites even the 48percent of males and 28percent of females who said they were indifferent to race sent messages to whites and just 3 percent contacted blacks. With statistics like these it is not surprising there is such an invisible taboo about interracial marriage or relationships.
All that said Sam said that interracial couples are on the up and I feel that as the older generation becomes more enlightened or dies off racial equality and acceptance for things that are different will flourish. Soon people will be able to concentrate on love for love and much less of all the other externalities.

This is such a difficult and tragic letter to respond to. He starts out in a way that really makes you relate and want to like him. After all we were all kids once. I think we get often caught up in people’s crimes and often forget that the most vicious of killers once started out as a cute little kid with his or her whole life ahead of them. In a way its so sad to see how the world takes the innocence away from children.
He goes on to say he now lives in prison with murderers, rapists, and thieves. Immediately you think “Well this guy is also a violent offender or something of the sort to get himself in there.” It turns out he is not. The reason why I say this is such a difficult letter to respond to is for the fact that all the things that I want to point out make him a good person and why I think he should get a second chance he already rebukes as things that we should not admire about him. I can’t lie, he does write very well and I feel it is a waste for someone with such intelligence to locked up in prison but he says “Do not say I deserve a second chance because I write well.” I want to sympathize with him because though the crime was heinous and vicious and yes he was in fact involved he did not kill anyone. The fact of the matter or what I got from it is a fourteen year old kid with family problems got caught up in the wrong crowd and was “involved” in a murder. The extent of his involvement was him crying upstairs and closing the doors of the other kids so that no other children would get involved or have to know what was going on.
What breaks my heart in a sense is that he is his biggest critic and his harshest critiquer. Yes he honestly he believes that he could have said and done something but when you’re a young boy who is caught in the middle of a murder and is fearing for your own life it is very hard to be brave or to even know what the right thing to do in that situation is. It sounds almost idiotic to say but “m” has a very cynical outlook on life. “Why? To garner sympathy? I do not want that. People should not sympathize with murderers. To create pity? Don’t pity me, I put myself here. To cause understanding? Why would I want to subject good people to the understanding of this horror. To teach? To teach what? We all know bad things, evil things happen all the time. To show that good people exist in prison? Come on, the prisoner who learns his lesson, changes his way, and goes on to help others is a movie cliche.” At the same time this is what makes me admire him the most. There are inmates in prison who have no regrets or remorse for what they did but he is letting what he didn’t do tear him apart.