That is so cute!! How did you come with that? That's an adorable idea!!

That's wonderful! My kids loved the display on the square! My 2 year old kept asking if she could go for a ride on one of the reindeer!

Traditions and memories come from unexpected places....That is very true. I almost think we tried a little too hard this year. Next year, I think I'm going to just relax and allow things to happen more naturally.

Pomegranates! I made a huge breakfast and the kids weren't really interested. They just wanted to play with their new stuff. Oh well...made for lots of leftovers!

We ended up walking around the square and looking at the display over there. The kids walked for about 15 minutes before they were ready to be done and head home! But it was nice to get outside at least for a few minutes!

That's annoying! We haven't gotten any phone calls, but we've been slammed with mailers. We get one or two nearly every day. And we've had people knock on the door a few times in the past couple of weeks, including Curt Hanson himself.

Well, it’s easy to say, “I don’t like labels,” but let’s be honest. Labels are EVERYWHERE: Liberal, Conservative, Vegetarian, Christian, Buddhist, Atheist, Meditator, etc. It’s how we find like-minded people who share our same philosophies.

If you browse the Parenting section of Barnes and Nobel, you can see that there are dozens of different parenting styles. If I’m looking for parenting advice or help, I’m going to search out someone who has similar philosophies, thus where labeling becomes helpful. Because of the way I define my parenting style, I’m probably going to search out a book by Dr. Sears, whose philosophies are more in line with mine, as opposed to say Michael Pearl, who advocates spanking and training your children to be submissive, because he is not in line with my parenting philosophy.

I think labels become detrimental when they’re applied as a sweeping generalization of a person. If used that way, they can be dismissive of a person’s multi-faceted complexity, and pigeon-hole said person to being nothing more than whatever label has been applied. But, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with labeling yourself or your philosophies in order to search out like-minded people for advice or comradery.

I think there’s a big misconception that if you’re not making all the decisions for your child, then somehow you aren’t involved with them, and they’re being left to fend for themselves. I agree with you completely…you learn to make choices by making them! And what better place to learn than as a child, surrounded by people who love and support you? I would rather they learn to make responsible choices at this stage, when the choices in their lives are “simple:” what to eat, when to go to bed, how to spend their time; Rather than making all the choices for them, with the idea of waiting until they have more “life experience” to make choices. By that point, the choices they will be confronted with could be more dangerous or impactful, and I would worry that they'd had no experience making decisions on their own, but instead had spent their lives memorizing other people’s good decisions.

Of course it’s an issue sometimes! They’re children, not perfectly-programmed robots! I think the important thing is being aware of what they are developmentally capable of. My two year old daughter doesn’t understand the concept of sharing yet….so, no…when her brother wants something she has; of course she doesn’t put his wants above her own! (Although, I know a lot of adults who still aren’t great at this skill!)

As far as being in places other than our home, we try to have a conversation ahead of time so they are aware of what will be happening. For example, if we’re going to the supermarket on a Saturday afternoon, we make sure they know that there will be lots of people and it will be important for them to walk closely to us so they don’t get hurt by another shopper who may not see them. We try to let them know if we’re getting a lot of stuff, or just a few things so they’ll have an idea of how long we’ll be. We try to keep them involved while we’re shopping and stay as attentive of their needs as we would in any other place.

I am certainly not an expert on the specifics of child development! But I can tell you what I’ve observed in my own kids. I would say that no…rationality does not develop at the same time as strong personal desire. My two year old, for example, is in love with trains. We live close enough to the train tracks that you can see the train go by from the street in front of our house. She will occasionally have a strong desire to run out into the street to watch the train go by, but clearly, she lacks the foresight to see what the consequences of that action could be. That would be where parenting comes in! As her parents, we’re aware that she has this desire, and that her desire is unsafe, so our job in that instance is to find a way for her to be able to safely see the train go by (watch from the safety of the sidewalk, etc).

As far as maturity-based decisions…I don’t think we expect our kids to make “mature” decisions for their lives. After all, we’re talking about bedtimes and what to have for lunch here, not picking a career path or deciding on a religion! Before they’re able to express their wishes/feelings/etc. what we strive to do is follow the cues they give us to figure out what it is they are needing or wanting at any given time. For example, if we put my eighteen month old to bed, and he cries after we leave the room, we would go back and get him. He’s not verbal yet, but his cry tells us he needs something: maybe he’s hungry, or has a belly ache, or isn’t tired yet. We don’t just leave him there to cry until he gives up and falls asleep; we pick him up and meet whatever need it is he has, even if that need is simply just to be with us. At the same time, if I have naptime planned for 1:00 in the afternoon, but he’s showing cues of being tired (rubbing his eyes, sucking his thumb, etc) at 11:30, I would put him to bed then.

So, no, my child doesn’t have the same life experience that you or I do. But I don’t feel that a lack of life experience exempts one from being treated with the same respect I would treat a fellow adult with. I respect that my children have needs and wants, and just because they are children doesn’t mean those needs and wants aren’t relevant.