gdp's Comments

Wonkette : The Snake Oil Bulletin: Butt-Chugging Gluten With The Food Babe

Sun, 15 Feb 2015 16:18:59 +0000

Biggus Dickus?

Wonkette : The Snake Oil Bulletin: Butt-Chugging Gluten With The Food Babe

Sun, 15 Feb 2015 16:18:20 +0000

Holy shit...that's rotten.

Wonkette : The Snake Oil Bulletin: Butt-Chugging Gluten With The Food Babe

Sun, 15 Feb 2015 16:15:29 +0000

And old man dying of cancer was given a coffee enema as a last resort. He thrashed and moaned during the process. Finally he lay there in a near coma mumbling. Just before he died he beckoned a doctor closer. The doctor put his ear next to the dying man's mouth as, in his last breath he said, too....sweet.

Wonkette : Rep. Blake Farenthold: I Did Not Have 'Wet Dreams' About Sexing That Staffer I Fired

Sat, 14 Feb 2015 15:53:20 +0000

You know the nightmare people have about waking up to find the Burger King in bed with them? Waking up to that face wold be even worse.

Wonkette : All About the D*cks: Your Florida Roundup

Sat, 14 Feb 2015 15:49:13 +0000

I hope that kid left the surgeon a tip.

Wonkette : All About the D*cks: Your Florida Roundup

Sat, 14 Feb 2015 15:48:10 +0000

One of my friends in Florida (I grew up there) is fond of posting shite about all the snow up here. "Oh, we have 5" of sand down here" or "Oh gosh, it's 70 degrees...where's my sweater?" You know what? This snow is going to melt soon, but you'll still be in Florida.

Wonkette : Rick Santorum Hates Americans For Our Erotic Freedoms

Fri, 13 Feb 2015 00:13:49 +0000

The power of Fabulous?

Wonkette : Rick Santorum Hates Americans For Our Erotic Freedoms

Fri, 13 Feb 2015 00:11:47 +0000

"Here...let me hold up the lamp before my golden door."

Wonkette : Scott Walker Way Too Smart To Answer Whether Evolution Is A Thing

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 02:30:12 +0000

"Only when he wants to be some bint's tampon".

Wonkette : Scott Walker Way Too Smart To Answer Whether Evolution Is A Thing

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 02:29:28 +0000

Plus, he did actually pilot jet fighters. Now granted, it did pretty much take more balls and bravado than brains to accomplish this, but those things weren't easy to fly.

Wonkette : Scott Walker Way Too Smart To Answer Whether Evolution Is A Thing

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 02:27:43 +0000

No, Christie...The Innocents Abroad is not about some kid from Secaucus losing his virginity to a Atlantic City prostitute.

Wonkette : Scott Walker Way Too Smart To Answer Whether Evolution Is A Thing

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 02:22:53 +0000

Oh yeah, handsome! Put your skulling oar in that hole there and rock it side to side. We'll soon get this boat moving!

Wonkette : Barack Obama Hates Maureen Dowd, As Do All Patriotic Americans

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 02:16:55 +0000

It's twue! It's twue!

Wonkette : Barack Obama Hates Maureen Dowd, As Do All Patriotic Americans

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 02:14:39 +0000

How do you pronounce his name? Is it like "do that", or "douche hat'?

Wonkette : Barack Obama Hates Maureen Dowd, As Do All Patriotic Americans

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 02:11:58 +0000

Neither did Ronnie, but Nancy made a good stand in.

Wonkette : Barack Obama Hates Maureen Dowd, As Do All Patriotic Americans

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 02:11:27 +0000

Kinda like the Drecks Files

Wonkette : Barack Obama Hates Maureen Dowd, As Do All Patriotic Americans

Thu, 12 Feb 2015 02:09:14 +0000

I'm not joking here. When I saw," $19.95 for a hardcover copy", I swear to god my brain read, "$19.95 for a doorstop " I had to go back a couple of times trying to figure how I came up with that. Wonkette? Are you using those subliminal message thing-a-ma-hickies again? Is that why I love you?

Wonkette : Montana Would Like To Not See Your Naked Bits, Please

Wed, 11 Feb 2015 01:33:02 +0000

Is that your pistol or are you just glad to...oh, it is a pistol.

Wonkette : Montana Would Like To Not See Your Naked Bits, Please

Wed, 11 Feb 2015 01:32:05 +0000

Where would you like your old Huffy banana seat to be?

Wonkette : Creationists: Darwin Was Wrong And Unicorns Are Real

Wed, 11 Feb 2015 01:26:13 +0000

When I ingest certain chemicals, I see purple spiders on the wall. I'm pretty sure they're not real.