I suppose I do have one "secret identity" on this site, now that I think about it. I did once submit a letter to Ask Doctor Nerdlove that Doc did answer.
Sometimes I feel like my online identity is way to fake. Not in the sense that what I say isn't truly what I feel most of the time, but that I say it in a far to calculated way. Like the person I present as is more of a caricature of who I am than the real thing and that my brain may be wording what I say in certain ways to evoke certain reactions. I often rewrite post, either in my head or on the actual page, multiple times before I post and each edit makes me feel more and more fake. Honestly, I'm not sure if this is making a lot of sense, but it's what runs through my head a lot.
Valentines Day has given us the wonderful gift of chalky candy hearts and for this all its sins are forgiven.
I apologize, I'm probably blowing this a out of proportion. What I'm trying to say, and I hope I get this across properly this time instead of messing it up, is that I have a very hard time reading other people. Anything more subtle than "about to punch you in the face" levels of anger are just lost on me.
I'll use a real life example. On multiple occasions I've sat in a restaurant for about 10 minutes with an empty drink while still eating. The server would walk past several times, but they wouldn't look at our table, so they never saw that I needed a refill. I have never tried to get their attention in these scenarios. When I think about it, I start to wonder "Why haven't they looked over here and seen this? Maybe the restaurant is busy or they have to cover for another person. Maybe they've been doing this for 10 hours straight and are just tired. What if they think I'm creepy and are trying to avoid the table because they don't want to talk to me any more than they have to?" I can't figure out what, if any of that, is right. It might even be something I can't think of at the time. When it comes down to it, I'd rather stay thirsty than make work for someone else.
See, but that last part is exactly my issue. I may think that I'm being reasonable, but so does the person that screams at someone because they can't get what they want. I don't know enough to avoid being that person, so I have to avoid the situation instead.
I have never been diagnosed with any sort of anxiety, so as far as I know I do not specifically have social anxiety. When I interact with people, any kind of person really, I don't want to bother, annoy or be a source of trouble for that person. Like, I don't want to be the person that goes up to a store employee and asks where to find an item that's in the isle I'm standing in. I have no talent for reading people and even if I did, I still wouldn't be able to know enough to guarantee that I wouldn't do something wrong. To give an example more specific to women, I don't want to be the creepy guy that tried to talk to her while she was out doing whatever. That person doesn't deserve the potential stress that could result.
Still, there remains a possibility, however small, that my presence and action might have a negative consequence on that other persons life. Other people are willing to take the risk in order to play the odds. I am not.
The problem I have with the idea of approaching (anywhere really, but especially in public during the day) is that you can never be completely sure you aren't going to bother someone. Even if their body language or actions seem like they are implying that they are interested, it is entirely possible that I am misinterpreting the situation or the person in question may have a different motive behind what they are doing. If that's true, then someone like me approaching them and attempting to start a conversation could be exactly what they don't want to happen. In these kinds of situations, if you can't be sure, it's really better to do nothing.
As a huge Warcraft fan, I really liked the trailer. Warcraft has always gone for stylistic over realistic with it's character designs and seeing these characters, whose models I've seen in games before, translate without much change to the big screen is going to be fantastic.
If anyone wants to add me, my code is c9ba51
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Thingamajig