If that was truly the first time he had heard that ratio I’m amazed at his composure. He immediately provided a rationale from our point of view which is amazing to me. My first response would have been anger and then being rational. The calm he radiated as he talked and considered the ratio was as if it was a fact of life he could understand which is just so alien for me. I’m sure it’s different because he lives in a war zone but it’s still so foreign for me to even consider thinking that way. From my point of view, if I heard that and knew they were coming to my country or were in my country already I would be up in arms. Every life is precious to me and to even consider coming up with a ratio instead of looking at each problem as a piece by piece case is unfathomable. It makes the loss of those lives seem blasé and trivial compared to the massacre killing twenty nine people should be. The only thing I can think of is that he is living in an entirely different mindset then we are or could even think about living here. Being in a war zone I can only imagine what he sees and hears every day on the news and from family and friends or the fear of even just going out might sometimes bring. These harsh facts would defiantly give you a different perspective and maybe a mindset where you could see how another person might need to protect themselves and their country enough to come up with a ratio. It’s this mindset I believe that allowed him to think objectively and look at what rational response he would have if he was in America’s shoes to understand the other side the way we did. Not coming from such a dramatic and harsh area I would have had a very different response. I would immediately have been offended and probably would have ranted a bit before calming down. I might have eventually come to a calm place where I could offer the response he gave but it would have taken longer. It may have even taken someone pointing it out to me. Even then I’m not sure I would have totally agreed with the ratio. While I can objectively say it may have been necessary due to the circumstances I don’t think I will ever be able to think in any way where something like that is moral or just. All life is good and to wipe out so many civilians would be unfathomable. I would always look for another way no matter the cost if it prevented the ratio coming true on any sort of consistent basis.

I’m not sure if all the words would be replaced or changed but there would certainly be some additions to the current vernacular. A lot of the words currently used to describe sex do involve sort of rough or violent language which would initially lend itself to a male centered world but wouldn’t necessarily be excluded from a woman centered one. In my mind, a woman centered world would be more based on communication and emotion. Women would let everyone into position of power men and women alike it would just be the way we interacted that would change. We as women don’t need to feel like we are always on top or in control to feel good about ourselves so it makes sense that to feel powerful we would be more focused on how people interact then job status. The way people talk to each other would show who’s in charge and in power. This means that the language of sex would get some new additions in my opinion. The words would lend themselves to equaling the playing field of sex instead of always placing the man in power through a physical type of language. Although sex is very physical it can also be an emotional and spiritual experience and that’s mostly what the women are focusing on when they have sex. It’s not so much about the physical act of sex it’s about how it makes us feel and the new way of being close with someone else. Men however use the much more physical and forceful language of “bang”, and “fuck”. These words don’t really lend themselves to being emotional or spiritual it mostly refers to the pure act of having sex. There would be much more sensual terms like “making love” in the vernacular and would include some that refer specifically to the connection. In fact I invented some; “soul rubbing”, “becoming one” and “trading hearts” come to mind. If you look closely, these words focus on the heart and mind of the people having sex, which is where sexual arousal starts for a women; If her hearts not in it, neither is she. However that doesn’t mean I think those words would disappear completely from the language. Words like “fuck” are forceful and commanding and can be fun for certain aspects of sex that is downright just about the physical. And as a woman, I freely admit to enjoying these as well. These words would just become secondary to the other terms, just like making love isn’t gone from our language; it’s just not used as much. In a woman centered world the sensual emotion connection would dominate with the physicality of sex being an important second fiddle, fun in its own right.

I’ve honestly never considered race a huge factor in dating for me. If anyone wants to date me it’s about what we have in common and how well we match as people. If I feel like we match as people I will then start to see things about the person I’m looking at attractive. That’s not saying I’m not like everyone else and don’t have standards as far as looks go as well but they aren’t specific to a race. I like a strong jaw line, some meat on your bones, and a butt that actually fills out your jeans (not even white boys look good with a “white man’s ass”). I’ve found black, white and brown, guys that meet my criteria. So far I have only dated within my race but I would defiantly not be opposed to trying something else if I felt a connection was there.
The only problems I see people ever having when they date outside their race seem to come from the pressures outside the relationship, namely family society and friends. But if two people really want to be together they’ll work through it or at least that’s how I like my relationships to work. In fact I think that dealing with these stressors, while difficult, could show you how well you work together as a team to overcome challenges. If you can look your family and friends in the eyes while they tell you how wrong what you are doing is and work through it with a person, you’ll find a true partnership to build a relationship on.
I think a lot of times people worry that they may not have as much in common with someone of a different race and that’s why they don’t go for it, but we’re all human here. Everyone regardless of race is going to come from a different place a different background and have led a different life than you have. Shouldn’t you welcome that diversity of life with open arms? Living in the global community that our world is growing into today I feel should show people that sometimes what is perfect for you is not always what you are used to or expect it to be. It’s not always going to be the “safe” or “comfortable” choice where everything falls into place and you don’t have to fight to make it work but if something isn’t worth fighting for it’s not worth it. The differences in the people around us and how much expose ourselves to those differences and are open to them can define us as a person and show us a whole new way to experience life. One that is richer, and more beautiful for the diversity.

I would have to say that I do think it’s defiantly harder to relearn ideas about race if you learn something different when you’re young. When you are young and impressionable is when you learn a lot of the core values for your life and while you can change these by going out into the world and forming your own they still affect you. It’s always harder to challenge and change a belief than it is to learn a completely new idea. It becomes especially hard to shake an idea when you learn it at that young an age. For example many of us were made fun of in school for some part of our body and now, despite being much older; we are still self conscious about that body part. When we are made fun of or find out about race negatively at such a young age it’s bound to have an impact on our young psyche and affect us for a long time. Even if we are immediately told afterward by a loved one that we are beautiful and that body part is perfectly fine, the words and idea has been planted and can be hard to overcome when planted so early. If someone makes fun of a body part when we are older however, because we have a much larger range of experiences and have developed more fully into ourselves that type of teasing and words is not as harsh. It still affects us and can be hard to recover from but not nearly as hard as if we had heard the same thing earlier in our lives. I think this makes a case for us to educate our children positively earlier about race so that more children can feel beautiful and appreciated without always looking at the other children and wondering why they aren’t the same. Every child should have a childhood to feel beautiful in. Going along with this I think that the people of color in our generation need to take a stand to own up to their natural beauty. It’s their choice whether or not to relax their hair and such if it makes them feel prettier but when it starts to affect their children by making them feel pressure to have relaxed hair to a change needs to be made in the culture. Every girl and women of course hates their own hair but they should by no means dislike it so much to be relaxing their child’s hair at a young age to fit some ideal. Everyone is different and beautiful if they have confidence in themselves and own whatever look they decide to portray to the world. You can choose how you want to look but don’t choose for your children.

I led and lead a pretty blessed life and I know it. I would like to think and say that my life has been a series of free will choices, but in thinking about this question I realize that it hasn’t been. At a very young age I found books and reading due to being in the nurturing environment my parents gave me. Both my parents pushed me to learn and study as well as experience the outdoors so I had a good balanced home life, and still do, from which to branch out into the world. My love of reading developed into a fine skill giving me such an edge in school that I can’t remember studying after fifth grade until I got to college. I simple read the material from the book tried a few problems and generally understood it based on previous readings on the subject. Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, I am one of those kinds a people who reads the dictionary and science works for fun so this worked out. I continued to learn and expand doing well in high school without trying and earning over two thousand on the SAT’s. If I’m honest with myself I can honestly say that I accomplished all these without trying all that hard outside school and certainly without a job or financial worries to hinder me. My dad makes enough to help me out with college and since both sides of my family have gone to college for two generations now, it was never a question whether or not I was going to college. While I did have to take out loans to come here, I can’t honestly say there was all that much free will involved. With the good grades and SAT scores I got into all three of my college choices and, in the first aspect of free will so far in this story, went with Penn State. With all these factors pushing me it wasn’t a matter of hard work or perseverance but simply determinism and circumstances that brought me here. It was never a matter of working hard to accomplish it, it was simply working enough not to screw up what I had going for me. The only instances of free will that have advanced my life are in my relationships, which in our culture is everyone’s free will. Determinism in a positive way has defined my life from the beginning, even shaping my personality to some extent by giving me a sibling so I had even more reason to be a smart and well read to show him up. Without my nurturing youth and stable childhood I’m not sure I would have had the drive to work hard enough to actually get where I am today.

I honestly would like to think race will eventually stop being an issue for future generations but I’m unsure. Our generation, when compared to those that have come before us, has certainly made significant strides in this direction in terms of how we think and react to race and the subject in general but for all of this progress I’m aware that there still is racism in our country. I think that people in general like to stereotype others and put them into boxes because it helps them make sense of our very disorganized world and this can lead to unintentional racism. People like to feel superior to others for any and all reasons they can think of and being racist is one way to do that. Unless more people get out and expose themselves to those of all races and creeds it’s defiantly easy to judge and feel superior to them. When we do this it passes on to our children and the ignorance persists. In almost all ways, the racism of this country can be traced to simple ignorance. Ignorance of others leads to fear and misjudgment that can and has lasted generations. Until we as a country can open our minds and hearts together to others, our country will continue to have those that turn a blind eye or even actively participate in the racism problem. And it is a problem. Everyone should be able to love and respect everyone else in a country such as ours. This country was founding as a mixing pot for all races and religions and we have not yet realized that goal and if the close-mindedness of past generations persists we may never will. I see people with fear in their hearts towards Muslims every day express hatred towards them, just because it’s something they can’t or won’t open their minds to because of supposed offenses.
On the other hand I feel like we have made a lot of strides that could indicate we are doing better in terms of race and racism. We have an extremely mixed man as our president, More and more people I talk to have friends of other races, and while I understand there are still difficulties for people of mixed races who wish to have a relationship, it is certainly accepted by the media and newspapers, which can be one reflection of society. In future generations it’s easy to think this trend and improvements that have been made will continue to grow and improve our society’s culture. Maybe one day in the future, if generations continue to make improvements and teach their children to help clear up the ignorance in their own small part of the world, there may be no need for the race relations class to bridge the gap.

Although people do tend to associate with people of the same race as themselves, I don’t believe it’s entirely intentional. Instead I believe there are some simple factors that apply when people make friends that govern this phenomenon more than race does. The first factor I believe contributes is that, in general, people make friends with people they can relate to or who enjoy the same activities as themselves. This restricts the people they will associate by a good margin. A lot of activities are cultural in nature as well so here is where you start to see people of the same race coming together. The number of possible friends is also restricted by age making the pool to choose from even smaller. The second factor is proximity. While races do mix in neighborhoods to some extent, for the most part the people who live around you will be of a similar culture or race to yourself. This creates bonds between people of the same race very quickly. The last factor is that once people have a good solid friend group it can be very hard to expand that group to include others. This means that even if you were to meet someone of another race they may not get along with your friends and it will decrease how much contact you have from them. These factors make it hard for people of different racers to come together unless they lead similar lives close to each other. Different races often have different cultural values and ideas making it more unlikely their life is similar to yours and vice versa creating a decrease in how much they mix. That’s not to say people don’t mix because they often do. Many people of different races can come together over those similar interests or activities but in general even if your friends you would not hang out with them as much as you would with friends you can relate to you on a cultural level as well as relating to your various interests. Again I’m not saying you don’t see best friend s who are totally inseparable and of different races, its just less common. People like to be with others who share their experiences and if someone is from another country they may want to connect with someone who is going through that same thing, dealing with the homesickness and culture shock together. All in all I believe these things can be overcome in the right situation like high school or college but people tend to stick tight with people who understand them the most, even if this means staying close to others of the same race. It’s an unfortunate side effect to the human race seeking to be truly understood by others.

I had two conflicting views on this issue when we talked about the subject in class and can’t decide on one in answer to your question. On the one hand, it’s reassuring to know that I’m build with wider hips and a stockier frame out of necessity for my cold loving ancestors. It makes me walk a little prouder to realize I’m literally my own walking heritage made into living form, very cool concept. On the other hand I still live in today’s world with today’s body ideals and images. So while it may have been okay and even ideal to be stockier when my frame was needed hundreds of years ago, in today’s world I still wouldn’t be considered an ideal beauty. With that comes the knowledge that no matter how much confidence I acquire or how happy I personally am with my body others won’t view me as especially beautiful. And that hurts a little. It makes it a little easier to look in the mirror knowing my ancestors have given me the attributes to survive but it doesn’t change how others see me, which can be the biggest factor in anyone’s body image. How you perceive others to see you can make or break a self body image, as seen in girls with eating disorders. They don’t actually see what’s truly in the mirror anymore and only how they think others view them, in their case, they believe others judge them to be fat. Once they get help and can look at themselves happily in the mirror it becomes easier to face the outside world, but it’s still a challenge.
If we could change the ideal and public opinion to be less judgmental and harsh I think we could be more in control of our own body image, because while some people can look out at the world and truly not care what people think, for the rest of us it’s hard. The knowledge that our body is hereditary can lessen body image issues without a doubt but it doesn’t erase them completely. I’m still going to freak out when I see myself jiggle a little when I jump and I’m definitely still going to try to diet to obtain the ideal weight. But the knowledge that your body is hereditary could defiantly help keep people from fad dieting or binging to lose weight. Just that little boost can sometimes be the difference between happy change and desperate change. If I look into the mirror long enough I can see the great attributes my ancestors past done and be okay with it, it’s just harder once you step out that door and it’s not just you looking anymore. All in all I think this knowledge would help body image issues but it wouldn’t solve the problem entirely.

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