gdp's Comments

Wonkette : Mike Huckabee Practices New GOP Outreach To Women: They're Whores Who Can't Stop Boning

Fri, 24 Jan 2014 07:03:27 +0000

On a scale of 1 to Eponine, how friendzoned were you?

Wonkette : Baby Pesticide, Army Rape, Wife Rape And Slavery: Meet VA Congressional Candidate Dick Black!

Thu, 16 Jan 2014 04:01:33 +0000

I'm guessing he's agin' it.

Wonkette : Satanic Temple Unveils Beautiful Artist's Rendering Of Its Sweet Dark Lord For Oklahoma Capitol

Tue, 7 Jan 2014 22:02:50 +0000

A unicorn like in The Cabin In The Woods, perhaps: http://youtu.be/9ArNmIMgeVg

Wonkette : Satanic Temple Unveils Beautiful Artist's Rendering Of Its Sweet Dark Lord For Oklahoma Capitol

Tue, 7 Jan 2014 21:56:54 +0000

"Only two things come from Oklahoma, son! Satan and queers, and I don't see no hor...oh."

Wonkette : Who Are The Obamas Insulting By Attending Mandela's Funeral?

Fri, 6 Dec 2013 22:18:05 +0000

Ghandi?

Wonkette : Rob Ford Tires Of George Zimmerman Getting All The Attention, Knocks Down Old Lady On Camera

Mon, 18 Nov 2013 21:01:33 +0000

You know, apparently, somewhere there is a Mrs. Rob Ford, she of the delicious (or at least plentiful) vajay-jay, and she's just got to be *mortified.*

Wonkette : Kentucky Tea Party Will Murder Public Libraries, For Freedom

Mon, 9 Sep 2013 19:20:06 +0000

Ignorance can be cured but stupid is to the bone.

Wonkette : Feminists Hysterical

Wed, 28 Aug 2013 21:27:39 +0000

Deciding "All right, then, I'll go to Hell" for theft rather than returning a runaway slave is a far cry from deciding "All right, then, I'll screw that kid." The kid might "be hot." The kid might "want it." None of that relieves the adult of the responsibility not to screw the kid. Don't f*ck children. Period.

Wonkette : Wonkette Completely Destroyed By Cenk Uygur's Blistering Logic Bombs

Wed, 28 Aug 2013 20:55:34 +0000

AOT,K. Or is that forbidden? I forget.

Wonkette : West Virginia Judge Indicted After Trying To Live Out Bad Noir Movie Plot

Mon, 19 Aug 2013 20:57:53 +0000

And someone's got to lose a hand and attach some sort of weird, prosthetic device in its place.

Wonkette : Tucker Carlson's Daily Caller Simply Does Not Care For All These Whorish 'Teachers' Whoring It Up

Mon, 19 Aug 2013 20:49:12 +0000

When I was in law school, going to bars with my girlfriends, one friend would always say she was a nurse and the other always claimed to be an elementary teacher. 2-3X as many guys would buy drinks as bought drinks for us when they knew we were lawyers. On the other hand, they/we were drinking with the kinds of guys who wouldn't buy drinks for baby lawyers. We needed better bars.

Wonkette : Tucker Carlson's Daily Caller Simply Does Not Care For All These Whorish 'Teachers' Whoring It Up

Mon, 19 Aug 2013 20:44:55 +0000

Don't forget the studly cops. You could have a Guns n' Hoses sort of theme, if you like.

Wonkette : Listen To A Bunch Of Idiots On San Antonio Councilwoman's Staff Try To Figure Out: What Makes A Gay?

Fri, 16 Aug 2013 16:20:33 +0000

(Late Thursday, Bazan gave a statement: “I was basically explaining the viewpoint that some people have on the gay marriage issue. What I said was wrong and I deeply regret it. I can say that those comments, which were intended to be purely political, do not reflect my heart. Councilman Nirenberg, whom I currently serve and support, has made it clear that discrimination is not negotiable, and I am proud to work for him.”) The incest and animals dude apparently lacks the courage of his convictions. HEY! Maybe that's the problem with these people: maybe they want to do all these things they're imagining other folks doing and it's only the law holding them back?

Wonkette : Should Gay Marriage Be Outlawed Because Gays Can't Sex Each Other In Missionary? Your Wonkette Inves

Fri, 16 Aug 2013 16:15:52 +0000

Yeah, but what about all those saints and apostles backin' up from behind, hmmm?

Wonkette : Michigan College President Really Tired Of Government Always Counting Those 'Dark Ones'

Thu, 1 Aug 2013 15:27:50 +0000

You could call the little ones "darkies!"

Wonkette : Nice Time: Fox News Accidentally Sends That Muslim's Jesus Book To Number One

Tue, 30 Jul 2013 14:51:26 +0000

"Verily, the last shall be first and the first shall be last , bitches!" he did not add.

Wonkette : New Pope Wants Kids Wilding In The Streets

Mon, 29 Jul 2013 21:39:23 +0000

Right? They've got one in reserve...

Wonkette : Baton Rouge Sheriff Is Sorry Not Sorry That He Arrested You People Just For Being Gay

Mon, 29 Jul 2013 21:34:38 +0000

His sex-hungry wife bought it for him.

Wonkette : American Babies Cost Three Times as Much as European Babies, For Freedom

Wed, 3 Jul 2013 15:39:57 +0000

Good girlfriend delivered at 26.5 weeks. Baby was 1 3/4 pounds and was in NICU for three months on ventilators and all kinds of machines. She got a bill from the hospital, not the doctors (3 of whom came to see Emily every day she was in the hospital) or the pharmacy, for, I shit you not $999,998 and change. My girlfriend works for the state, so she only had to pay $300 for the delivery, but her husband is self-employed in a family business and, if she'd been on his coverage, that would have punched the million dollar cap for the entire family. We thank God, daily, for Obamacare and coverage for pre-existing conditions. Happiest of all, at one year old, Em has made up all her "premie lags," and, although petite, is showing no signs of developmental delays or vision problems.

Wonkette : Thursday Sad Time: Liberal-Hearted Lord Of Snark Roger Ebert Dead At 70

Fri, 5 Apr 2013 15:31:11 +0000

My favorite is Absolute Power. Eastwood seeks vengeance, or justice, or something, but he's not primarily a killing machince; he's a decent, flawed man who loves his daughter. Plus: Gene Hackman. I mean, really.