elephantjournal

elephantjournal

121p

7,204 comments posted · 22 followers · following 1

1 day ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - Why I Always Practice ... · 1 reply · +1 points

The words are from the author and the pics are from the model. Maybe we can get the author to send us some nude yoga pics of herself! :)

1 day ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - The Toxic Attraction B... · 0 replies · +1 points

Michael we post all comments unless they are abusively spoken (like insulting/attacking the person instead of just stating your own differing perspective) or if youve added outside links, which flags the comment as potential Spam.

1 day ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - Why we shouldn't be so... · 0 replies · +1 points

The thing about freedom of speech, you don't have to agree with it. I dont really give a shit what this guy or the people in the parade think, this is America and you can think whatever you want to think. Fly whatever flag you want and be whoever you wanna be. Freedom means you can be an asshole if you choose. Either way let these people continue with their parade, if you don't like it you're free to go have a fuck rednecks parade.

I agree, people can burn the flag if they want. However I don't think we should be flying confederate flags on government buildings. It's not the symbol of the nation, just a battle flag from a rebellion and brutal civil war.
Private citizens though? Go nuts.

1 day ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - The Toxic Attraction B... · 0 replies · +1 points

Hi John,

It's working for us. Here's the direct link on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vNFWrn8BT2E. Hopefully that works :)

With ele love,
Katarina

2 days ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - Ask Me Anything: Husba... · 0 replies · +1 points

Andi Peterson Straus Unhappily married I'd say.
Like · Reply · 1 · 1 hr

Jamie Davison He is totally well within his right to do this, it's totally perfectly fine and natural for this to happen. Attraction come and go, for whatever reason and it's totally fine.
Like · Reply · 1 · 23 mins

April Marie Malone Now they are even, his ugliness lost her attention years ago...lol.
Like · Reply · 1 · 1 hr

Jacqueline Morris Mitchell 30 pounds!! That's pretty darn good for 20 years!! It would great if you both went to the gym together!!
Like · Reply · 1 · 2 hrs

Joey Konkel I love them thick .... Just sayin.
Like · Reply · 5 · 3 hrs

Kristina Payette Vanlerberghe It only matters what you think about yourself. Screw anyone else
Like · Reply · 1 hr

Hollie Raymond He sounds very shallow and douche bag like.
Like · Reply · 1 hr

Paula Kakuschke Goldberg Get a grip and love her anyway.
Like · Reply · 19 mins

Heidi Johnson Yes, but an ugly interior shows in the face and in the language of words and thoughts.
Like · Reply · 50 mins

颜敬红 If you're honest , yeah being fat is not attractive. Enough said
Like · Reply · 52 mins

Patricia Hagins What a SOB! I hope you gain 300 pounds!
Like · Reply · 2 hrs

Doreen Gurrola Auger Amen sister
Like · Reply · 3 hrs

Kerry Kandi So...uhm. Lose weight?
Like · Reply · 50 mins

Julie Hattory chosen someone different, not having these issues???? how could you ever know?????>:(
Like · Reply · 1 hr

Tracie Costabile Dumm I hope this guy's wife is never a burn victim. frown emoticon
Like · Reply · 1 · 45 mins

Heidi Johnson Amen, or goes bald from the cruelty of breast cancer. That is real love. Need pleasure and pain, light and dark, and then everything seems sexier and full of grace and authenticity. I am glad I chose the right husband and gave up plenty of boyfriends liking just my looks or wanting to keep me at no more than 130 lbs....with hypothyroidism. Keep it real. This is his issue, not her weight. Plenty of wonderful men out there. Let it go. Let him go. Narcissists will not change and blame the other person for their shortcomings. Peace to her. Xo
Like · 29 mins
Elephant Journal

Write a reply...

Ali Parman Round two...
Like · Reply · 3 hrs

Matt Stueck Love wins
Like · Reply · 1 · 2 hrs

Rachael Lorenz-Stockdale Oh what a dick..
Like · Reply · 34 mins

Karin Simon you can do this together. support healthy food together. offer to cook. work out together at a club she likes. commit yourself to her progress and stop whining about this.
Like · Reply · 1 hr

Amanda Diamond Lol
Like · Reply · 1 · 3 hrs

Cindi Coker frown emoticon
Like · Reply · 3 mins

Julie Richards I hate that so many people are beating this guy up for feeling how he feels, when he obviously wrote in to get women's perspectives! His wife is not physically the same woman he married, and he's not sexually attracted to her anymore. How about giving him advise like, maybe he could try to have her go to the gym with him, or.. maybe he should have a heart to heart with her & be totally honest and see where that goes... instead, so many of you are basically telling him that he, and his feelings, are a piece of shit. Check the mirror!!
Unlike · Reply · 1 · 2 hrs

Audra Hall This. This is why we can't ever figure shit out. The guy opened up about what was wrong and BAM! He gets smacked. This is the other side of fat shaming. The "I'm not allowed to say how I feel because it makes me the insensitive jerk" part. Does his statement show a lack of sensitivity? A little. BUT--she knew who he was when she married him. You know NOTHING about their relationship except a tiny blurb. Maybe she's doing it to keep him at bay. Maybe it's her way of isolating herself. There's a lot more going on here than anyone knows because no one is living in this relationship except them. He reached out and got slapped down because no one wanted him to be honest, just wanted to stamp on his insensitivity. How is that helpful? My other half has seen me skinny and fabulous, whale-sized post baby and everything in between. He's never treated me differently, even though I'm sure he's not attracted to my body fat any more than I am. However--if he did treat me differently--I would mind. But he wasn't a shallow person when we met and our relationship wasn't based on how fabulous my ass looked in a bikini 25 years ago. This wasn't an appropriate venue for him to air his issue. He should have talked to his wife. The fact that he didn't or felt he couldn't, speaks volumes about their relationship, beyond his body issues with her. The only helpful and kind advice to offer is to tell him to talk to the person he's in the relationship WITH, talk TO her, rather than seeking a public forum to talk ABOUT her.

2 days ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - Ask Me Anything: Husba... · 0 replies · +1 points


Christopher Tai Destin I get so tired of people complaining about being overweight and their significant others/partners... etc... not being attracted to them because of it... if you were not overweight when you became a couple and your partner has remained fit... what makes you think you shouldn't have to put an effort in as well... attraction is a mostly biological response... we are stimulated by many things... some of which can not be changed... we all have problems... medical... emotional... physical... but at the end of the day... we owe it to ourselves and to the person we live to work hard... put our best effort in to remain some what present... active... mindful of ourselves and our partners...
Like · Reply · 1 · 1 hr

Monica D'los Santos This is so sad... I didn't read the whole article. But I hope he at least offered some help to her for losing weight. He mentions he goes to the gym... Has he asked her if she wants to go and workout together??? Regardless if you are a woman or a man, we should all take care of our bodies and our sanities. Is she depressed?? Has he thought about that???
Like · Reply · 24 mins

Laura Littles Wow. Sounds to me like he was never really in love with her in the first place, just attracted to her physically. Maybe if she felt loved and supported she would have some motivation. Or maybe she is happy with how she is. Either way he doesn't deserve her. What a douche!
Like · Reply · 7 · 3 hrs

Mientjie Fritz Even when men are overweight as well?
Like · Reply · 1 · 3 hrs

Dina Barrera Honest open communication is what they need.. The fact that he is sharing his worries with a social journal is a start, but he needs to be honest with her.. I know it's a sensitive subject, but so is adultery and divorce.. Truth is, if he does seek attention from another woman, or if he leaves and divorces her, most likely she will shed those 30 lbs real quick.. Whether it be through depression, nevers, anger.. The pounds will come off.. Why wait till then.. Be honest and open about what is going through your mind.. Save your marriage. Odds are, she is not happy with her body changes and this could be a reason she has no desire for sex.. Good luck!!!
Like · Reply · 1 · 2 hrs

Jeni Decker I'm sure there are a number of things she thinks aren't very pleasing about you. Your teeth, your breath, your hairline, your lack of prowess in the sack... I suggest you tell her how you feel about her weight, then ask her to share her concerns about you. Quid pro quo, Clarice.
Like · Reply · 2 · 2 hrs
Now this is only visible to the person who wrote it and their friends.
Unhide · Delete · Report · Ban Navarro Ayoub Job

Erin Casey The response on that first one was perfect.
Like · Reply · 44 mins

Zoe Pink 30 lbs over 22 years! Ffs. Sounds like most women. And most men.
Like · Reply · 2 · 2 hrs

Laura Ferreri-Barrera Shallow son of a bitch that just doesn't get it!!
Like · Reply · 2 · 2 hrs

Michele Watson-Adkins Yeah, it is about you...not her. Let her go to be with someone else who deserves her.
Like · Reply · 40 mins

Beth Nielsen 30 lbs isn't much r specially with aging. Besides if he really loved her he would work with and continue to encourage healthy behaviors and support her through the process.
Like · Reply · 2 · 2 hrs · Edited

Lauri Owen dump him. buh bye.
Like · Reply · 1 · 1 hr

2 days ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - Ask Me Anything: Husba... · 0 replies · +1 points

Heather Parks Seriously all of this judgment against this guy is gross. His feelings are valid, in my opinion. At least he's not cheating on her like many, MANY other men would have done.
Like · Reply · 1 · 1 hr

Clara Madrid I didn't read it. She should leave him and file for a divorce, he doesn't respect or love her, end of story.
Like · Reply · 3 · 2 hrs

Heidi Johnson I did not read it either. Did not have to, could feel there is a lack of respect. Sad. The excuses that some make to not feel deep love. Denial of our own walls and barriers prevents connection.
Like · 1 · 1 hr
Elephant Journal

Write a reply...

Amanda Jane If this was the other way around, would all the responses still be the same? I doubt it.
Like · Reply · 8 · 3 hrs

Liz White Other way round i still would have posted my comment about loving someones soul
Like · 7 · 3 hrs

Jocelyn Slater In fact, my own opinion, that any marriage when entered into by choice on both people's parts, it should be because each cares about the other as a person. Looks, @ least to me, have nothing to do with that, and the guy who wrote the "Dear advice columnist" part of this article needs to get over himself if he really does feel the way he claims. And yes, if it were a woman writing in about her 200-lb husband, I would still think the same. Did it ever occur to him that the fact that she gained weight might be a self-esteem issue on her part? With a husband like that, I wouldn't be surprised if it were.
Like · 2 hrs

Gabrielle Alvarez It's barely ever the other way around. Men have it easy.
Like · 1 · 1 hr
Elephant Journal

Write a reply...

Liz White What happened to loving the soul!
Like · Reply · 8 · 3 hrs · Edited

Sarah Clarke I think, if he's wishing he's married someone else, maybe he's already looking for a way out and is just using his wife's weight as an excuse. Because, face it, people change, life happens, and if you can't take changes in your partner's appearance, you probably shouldn't be with an actual human being.
Like · Reply · 3 · 2 hrs

Alejandra de la Vega Thirty lbs isn't even anything!! Jeez. Did she have his kids? If she did, a thirty lb weight gain makes her superhuman. Most women put on quite a bit more than that. Either way, married for 22 years and to hear this nonsense from him.....wow. Just, wow
Like · Reply · 7 · 3 hrs

Mario Echeverria Look what happen to Ozzie and Judith!!!! Lol
Like · 2 hrs

Alejandra de la Vega They look great squint emoticon
Like · 1 · 2 hrs

Mario Echeverria They blamed each other for getting them self fat lol I just love them
Like · 2 hrs

Alejandra de la Vega Hahahaha they do!!! omg they're so cute
Like · 1 · 2 hrs
Elephant Journal

Write a reply...

Catherine Nelson Cunningham Hmmmmm, just trying to find an excuse to cheat?At first he said he never has and would like to think that he never would cheat. But yet on the other hand he doesn't think that people are meant for monogamy........ Hmmmmmm, just looking for an excuse! Also if he tells her how her looks turn him off then that would explain a lot!!! He's an ass.
Like · Reply · 2 · 1 hr

2 days ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - Ask Me Anything: Husba... · 0 replies · +1 points

Melissa Cain Wakey wakey & read something, if all else fails watch a TED education. http://www.ted.com/.../peter_attia_what_if_we_re_....
Like · 2 · 2 hrs

Randi Parke Thank you Melissa Cain for actually giving a viable source of info. This was quite interesting to watch
Like · 1 hr
Elephant Journal

Write a reply...

Thyer Taom If his dick doesn't get hard because she's fat now and he's unattracted to that, then his dick doesn't get hard because he's turned off by her fat.

If she doesn't want to lose the weight so she can enjoy his hard dick and enthusiastic Attraction, then she stays fat and without sexual attention from him.
Like · Reply · 1 · 44 mins

James Love
James Love's photo.
Like · Reply · 26 · 3 hrs

James Glines Weight fluctuates but your love for your spouse should never die
Like · Reply · 3 · 2 hrs

Gabrielle Alvarez Let's all wait twenty years for his new question: " hey so my wife did lose that weight and she was hot .. For a while.. and I don't mean to sound like a douche but she's developed crows feet around her eyes.. I just don't know if this marriage is going to work.. I thought women never changed, I thought they had to stay perpetually perfect because that's what love is based on. " help.
Like · Reply · 3 · 2 hrs

Иаков Ашер My ex wife gained weight after getting married and having our two children. What bothered me most about the situation wasn't that she had gained the weight but her insistence that she would do something about it that never happened. Paying for an expensive juicer, gym memberships, workout clothing, and the constant badgering for reassurance that I still found her attractive.

As life turns out she had a condition called hypothyroidism. Which if you read up on causes some really crappy things to happen to your body and mental state.

She divorced me and already had an old fling rekindled quickly after notifying me of her intent and kicking me out of our home. She had 3 family members die in one year and no longer needed or desired my income to support our family due to inheritance. She pretty much blamed me for most of her unfortunate events.

Now she's been through at least 4 relationships in the last year. I'm in my second since finally moving on. I tried counseling, I've been sober for almost 18 months now. I've never been happier in a relationship in my entire life.

I suggest getting right with yourself. Find a spiritual outlet of some sort, get busy living an enjoyable life. Learn to communicate with her. If she doesn't want to put forth any effort then cut your losses. I'd rather give up everything and be genuinely happy than remain miserable with someone who won't put in the effort.

There's light at the end of the tunnel. Do it the right way and karma will reward you in spades.
Like · Reply · 2 hrs

2 days ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - Ask Me Anything: Husba... · 0 replies · +1 points

Dianne MacDonald Here's something that I didn't notice in the comments that I read. Sexual attraction almost always wanes over several years of marraige. He may have started to lose interest whether she gained weight or not. There has to be more than friendship, too. A marraige is a complex partnership that takes effort on both parts to keep it interesting both in and out of bed.
Dianne MacDonald's photo.
Like · Reply · 2 · 1 hr

Heidi Johnson Yes, it takes effort and being vulnerable and real. Comfy in your skin. All kinds of people are out having awesome and meaningful sex, both single and married! You gotta like who you are, to the core. That is sexy.... Confident... even when.
Like · 36 mins
Elephant Journal

Write a reply...

Martin Pender Dear dissatisfied, you're a male and it's built into your DNA and nothing, not even a woman, will change that. Not even silly one sided replies. you're one of many millions of men throughout the the world doing and feeling the same. Get over it, she will too !!
Like · Reply · 2 · 3 hrs
Azniv Angel It's awesome when a women leaves a man and takes care of herself, love yourself if your loved ones can't, no time for anything else in this lifetime...
Like · Reply · 1 · 3 hrs

Melissa Cain I'm glad I'm divorced. I'm sad that people are so amazingly ignorant. What a ... yeah. This makes me angry & sad & disillusioned because so many people are like this. If you can't see into the person you're with, you don't deserve to be with them... I may remain single forever & I'm okay with that, there are all kinds of toys on the market & they perform way better than any partner I've ever had (& I've had a few)
Like · Reply · 2 · 3 hrs

Adriana McBride I truly do not understand how people allow themselves to get grotesquely overweight when it's not due to health issues (which most of the time can be attributed to diet in the first place). No one just wakes up one day overweight...

I think everyone is beautiful and what's on the inside definitely matters more, but taking care of your body is THE BEST way to show gratitude for being alive/existing at all. Your body loves you so much and is always trying to heal you s and make sure you're okay, it's time to start loving your body back, ladies and gents. The human body is the most beautiful masterpiece.
Like · Reply · 2 hrs

2 days ago @ elephant journal: Yoga... - Ask Me Anything: Husba... · 0 replies · +1 points

Heidi Johnson My man is 50 and I am 45. We like our looks and our pounds and growing our own food. We love real food and we love for real. Gained about 20 lbs the past 13 years married, sex is incredible, more creative. More honest and open to being silly and frisky. So glad I did not marry a shallow man. So very grateful.
Like · Reply · 5 · 1 hr · Edited

Mark Flavin As an extremely overweight guy my wife dealt with the same feelings and I would be lying if I didn't say it hurt. After reflection I realized that I could empathize and appreciate her willingness to stay with me in-spite of those feelings. That said once she stopped riding me about my weight I have been able to make massive changes over a 100lbs lost.

Has it made a difference in our relationship? Less than you would believe. In the end we spoke through our feelings her of how I had let myself go, me how I felt hurt that she couldn't see past my weight. In those subsequent conversations we rediscovered our love and recognized that in spite of both issues we were and are madly in love.

She stopped harping on the weight and I stopped trying to justify my poor choices. Thank you for sharing your feelings and I hope yall can find a similar path to resolution.
Like · Reply · 5 · 1 hr · Edited

Nina Nixdorf If you concentrate on the wrapping after 22 years and possibly children that change a woman's body it was never love but just attraction. The wife is not a servant that has to stay attractive for sex if she cannot or does not want to. Not without understanding and care from her husband. Maybe she gained weight because he stopped looking at her long ago. He has never mentioned how many wrinkles he got, how much hair he lost or if he really wants to distract from the fact that his libido and fertility might be fading independetly from his attraction to his wife and he does not want to think of that.
Like · Reply · 19 · 3 hrs · Edited

Katie Martin Sex is arousal is biology. You can find yourself not physically attracted and still care for a person.
Like · Reply · 1 hr

Dagi Ha What one is or isn't sexually attracted to often has little to do with whether we care about someone. I have met women who desperately want to feel attracted to their men (I know a lot of inside stories, being a midwife....) and just didn't. It goes the other way around, too! And it's not that these women are just shallow. You can't turn sexual attraction on (pun intended) if it's not there.
Like · Reply · 1 hr · Edited

Catt Crawford my husband is the same way, its not your weight, but i know it is.he doesnt touch me or anything. i give up
Like · Reply · 3 hrs

Susan Spiegler This is all your problem. I feel sorry for your wife but not at all for you.
Like · Reply · 1 · 2 hrs

Nichole Kelly From my experiences with weight gain and loss, she's probably fucking miserable. And, with a husband who doesn't find his wife attractive no matter her size, who would blame her..
Like · Reply · 11 · 3 hrs

Jamie Berthold I put on weight and he became bald. Lol. It happens! Although I am not happy with my weight it doesn't help when he brings fast food in the house and donuts!
Like · Reply · 3 · 2 hrs

Julie Richards Does he know that, Jamie? Want me to come smack him around for ya? LoL
Like · 1 · 2 hrs

Jamie Berthold Yes Julie!!! His nickname is snacks! Lol With his metabolism he doesn't put on weigh but I do! It doesn't help only getting 2 hours of sleep a night.
Like · 1 hr
Julie Richards frown emoticon No kidding... I wish you could at least get 6 hours of sleep, for so many reasons! But you probably can't sleep even if Robbie is awake but with someone else, can you?
Like · 1 · 1 hr
Elephant Journal

Write a reply...

Jacques Malarkin Way too many variables. People seem too judgmental. All you women criticising the man when the majority of women think it about them selves and judge other women on there apearance. Im not saying hes right cause i dont know the whole storey but men are wired different. Hes thought about cheating and what no one in there long relationships have thought about it, geeze. 30 to 60 percent of partners cheat statisticaly. Out of all the people who commented has the sex died down the longer it got? Id guess thats a yes.
Like · Reply · 1 hr · Edited

Beth Ann Junod SSheprobably eats BC she is no longer attracted to you!
Like · Reply · 3 · 3 hrs