Ah, yes. It reminds me of that ancient Catalonian Christmas carol where all the users of the village's telephonic devices are encouraged to revel at the great celebration, shouting all the way, "Oh, I'm hungry! Two-score! Two-score! Two-score!" Which was the number of pies each of them felt like eating after a hard day of calling up all the other pie-eaters. "Oh, I'm hungry! [I could eat] Two-score [pies]! [I could eat] Two-score [pies]! [I could eat] Two-score [pies]!"

Thus was born Boxing Day, the day on which all the children who have telephones don boxing gloves and pummel each other in frenzied violence induced by the hypnotic thrum of advertising jingles which only the fiery Iberian commercialism of a Catalonian Christmas carol could have inspired.

So it was a short story with line breaks. Well done. I think you'll find there's more to writing poetry than arbitrarily deciding to hit Enter every few syllables. And it's meant to be: "Your defect, we correct."

I think this guy (http://www.essentialsolutions.co.nz/Free-Will-Kit... this reputable enough for me.

It's unfortunate that "Poe Toaster" looks almost the same as poetaster. I would rather be a "Poe Toaster" than the poetaster I really am. Then again, I'd rather be a Lamborghini Murcielago.

First off, this is the legendary Peter "One Dart" Manley, not Mr Porky. Second, Mr Porky is a fictional pig and brand of pork scratchings which sponsors Mr Manley. Thirdly, the reason he is facing away from the board is on account of crippling obesity.

O brächte Jupiter mir die vergangenen Jahre zurück!

By the way, the original Vergil goes, "O mihi praeteritos referat si Iuppiter annos". I could have attempted to preserve the metre, but I think few would have appreciated the effort.

Save those for later. You can make them into a really nice stock.